Help!! AIBU

[Liverpoolmumof2]

So My brother and his partner hve decided to get married however they have chosen not to have children present. That’s totally fine with me-that’s their wishes!! But it just so happens that the children they are on about just turns out to be my children aged 15 and 10. I have took this totally personal as my other siblings children aged 16-22 are all allowed to go, I called my brother who then said to me “oh well if you want them there they can go?!

It’s not about me having them there with all the other family members it’s about my brother wanting his 2 nieces at the wedding considering his 3rd niece aged 17 is a bridesmaid.
My dad has agreed with my brother and said oh well it’s his fiancés big day and if she doesn’t want them their then there not going!
Now my dad is really really unwell so I didn’t even argue with him but to be honest I’m not going myself and sitting there with all my other siblings and their children, while mine arnt invited!
Am I being unreasonable?

I called my brother who then said to me “oh well if you want them there they can go?!

So take them.

But make sure the bride agrees they can go too.

I normally would have said uabu, but considering your kids are the only ones left out, it's very unfair, plus there's no difference between a 15 and 16 year old. What's your relationship with his wife to be like?

It didn’t seem like she wanted them to go! It didn’t feel like a positive conversation from his behalf. It’s like he is just saying that to keep the peace.
Now I don’t want to do that as it’s uncomfortable for myself, partner and children.

Well I thought it was pretty good to be honest, I take their DD out now and again she is only 4 but loves to play with my 8 yo. I have helped them out in the past with child care too when they have been caught short. If they need anything they call viseversa and it’s no problem. But past year we haven’t seen much of each other, tbh tho I was up there a few weeks ago while she (fiancé) was unwell and offered to make medicine etc for her. I don’t really get on with 1 of her friends but it’s never caused a problem before as I’ve attended parties while the friend was there. That’s all I can think of tho. I speak to my brother nearly every day on the other hand.

So My brother and his partner hve decided to get married however they have chosen not to have children present. That’s totally fine with me-that’s their wishes!!
or
but to be honest I’m not going myself and sitting there with all my other siblings and their children, while mine arnt invited!

So which is it ?

Also, how come your dc are 15 and 10 in the first post, but you have an 8 year old by 7 mins past 12 ?

I assumed the wedding is some time in the future when the 8 yo will be 10

Yes wedding is in the future

How old are all your children now and what year is the wedding?

So your nieces and nephews will be 18 - 24, therefore adults.

So that does seem a reasonable cut off then, where a family choose not to have children at their wedding.

All ages are the age they will be at the time of the wedding

The 3rd niece who is bridesmaid will be 17 at the time of wedding. There is 10 months between my DD & her cousin who is invited

I have took this totally personal as my other siblings children aged 16-22 are all allowed to go

How many of them will be 16 or 17? The rest are adults they are irrelevant.

How many of said 16 or 17 year olds are part of the wedding party, eg bridesmaids?

I honestly don’t know why people wouldn’t want nephews and nieces at their wedding. But it seems like they have used 16 as their cut off point as to what constitutes a child. And they have said they can come if you want them to. So just go and take them.