To be upset

[Fiona4444]

Went out for a family dinner for our adult daughter last night which finished at around 11pm.

As we were walking back to the car, husband said that adult daughter wanted to go for a birthday drink - I told them I would be going home as I'm tired, and sitting in a busy bar watching them drink wouldn't be fun for me at 6 months pregnant.

He said fine and they headed off to a bar while I drove home on my own.

Am I being unreasonable to feel upset at being ditched and left to go home alone when pregnant and after a nice night out together as a group? (Everyone else who was at the dinner had gone home separately afterwards)

(I know this isn't a big deal in the grand scheme of things & I'll get over it, but I'm genuinely not sure if I was right to be upset or not & I'm conscious hormones might be playing a part.)

YABU. They wanted to go for a drink and you didn’t so you went home. Being pregnant isn’t really relevant unless you’re due to give birth imminently in which case it would be more understandable.

But hormones are wild so not your fault YABU!

Kindly, yes a little unreasonable- they did nothing wrong in carrying on with the birthday evening, but you know this!

You had your car and were driving home so I don't feel they ditched you but it must have felt a bit sad arriving home alone after a lovely evening together.

Just one of those things!

Ooo pregnancy hormones can really put things under a microscope at times, I am irrational when pregnant first to admit it! I don’t think he did anything wrong to extend the night with dd and let loose tbh.

He made sure you got to your car ok that you where welcome to come etc if you where like 9 months pregnant big no no as anything could happen but in this instance I think you know yabu.

I think it's nice he went out with your daughter!

Especially since it's her birthday.

Yabu.
I really don’t see the issue I am afraid. I think it’s nice he went for a drink and you could have joined them if you wanted, but also leaving them to it and going home alone is also fine. Being pregnant is irrelevant.

I lived in a pub when I was pregnant, some of my favourite ever nights out were sober, pregnant ones!

YABU

its your daughters birthday and a Friday night.
I think hormones are probably at play here.

It's weird if you're annoyed to be honest, they did nothing wrong

I agree with other posters. You didn't want to go, no one pressured you to. You had a safe way to get home. Would you really want your dh to miss out on principle?

Ok I suspected this might be the case.
Now I feel worse for letting him know last night that I was upset & putting a dampener on their night 😩

Oh no!

Just apologise this morning I'm sure he realised you were just feeling sensitive.

Yeah you are definitely being unreasonable

Of course YABU. It's your daughter's birthday which happens once a year. If he wants to go for a drink to celebrate his daughter then lovely! Hope they had a great time!

No one should be coming home and terminating birthday celebrations because you're pregnant / feeling upset. I don't see what there is to feel upset about.

But hormones and pregnancy can mess with your rationale I know so don't beat yourself up about it. Just don't mention it.

Also just read your PP, you need to apologise to him. If you brought this up to him it's giving a whiff of controlling behaviour.

I'm sorry, but this is awful, and blaming "hormones" is just a lame excuse. Your husband wanted to spend time with his daughter, on her birthday, and you begrudged him that. That's really, really bad form. You owe him the mother of all apologies.

You behaved really badly.

It’s your daughters birthday and Friday night, I can’t believe not only did you not go for one drink but that you made a fuss about it and made everyone feel bad.

You definitely owe him an apology.

As an aside, I can’t imagine being pregnant again with adult kids. But it does do weird things to a woman’s emotions.

What kind of hormones make you act like a child and put a dampener on your own child’s birthday celebrations?

Awful