When did your baby grow out of their 30 minute catnaps? What did you change?

[user666555]

Hello,

Not really an AIBU question, however, posting on this board for traffic.

My 14 week old has cat naps pretty much all day. She only sleeps for 30 minutes maximum. She won't even make it until the end of the wake window (as she's so tired - understandably) before she'll be tired, irritated and harder to settle.

When did your LO grow out of this? What can I do to help?

She does occasionally sleep for longer when we're out but I can't do this for every nap, I also unfortunately can't use a baby carrier as I have a really bad back.

When did your LO grow out of this and what did you do?

Her naps aren't in her crib (they're in her Joie swing - supervised, as she has CMPA and the swing would help the tummy aches when she was on the wrong milk - we've just changed to a better one)

Thanks

When you say "her wake window", what are you basing that on? What a book says that should be? Because it sounds like she's being stretched way past it.

My son was like this (and the naps would only be on me) until I realised at a similar age that his wake window was much shorter than I thought. When he showed tired cues, he was already overtired and wouldn't settle.

I shortened his "wake window" and started putting him down for naps earlier. Suddenly, he was napping properly. It seemed crazily short, he was around 4 months and I would literally set an alarm for 1hr 45m from waking to start getting him ready to go down 2 hours after, and instead of him fighting a nap for ages then barely sleeping, he'd go straight down for a much longer one

@CocoPlum thank you for your response.

I'm basing her wake window off of the Huckleberry app. Although, after reading your post I'm now starting to wonder whether or not the app is accurate for my daughter as the wake window is based on her age, not her individual sleeping needs. She was born three weeks early so I'm not sure if the app takes this into account?

However, I'm willing to make changes if it helps her sleep. I'll aim for shorter wake windows.

I've also just put her down for a nap in her crib and she fell asleep herself within five minutes. She usually has red light and white noise on overnight too and I've replicated that.

I'm just worried that she won't be able to tell the difference between day and night if I replicate her sleeping environment to match what it's like at night (she sleeps better at night than she does with naps).

However, it's making me wonder maybe she isn't able to link sleep cycles during the day because the naps aren't in her crib and are not in the same conditions that her night time sleep is?

Not sure if I'm making any sense whatsoever!

Ok, I think that might be the first issue. I don't know if it accounts for babies not born at exactly 40 weeks but your baby is not a robot baby who can be measured by an app! She is a little person with her own sleep needs. Ignore what that is telling you because just from a couple of lines it's clear that your baby is not managing those same wake windows.

Honestly, all babies are different and some will nap in same conditions as at night and differentiate fine, and some will do better if you keep things a little lighter/noisier in the day but honestly, whatever works for you is fine, especially when you are trying to get her to nap better.

You are heading into.prime sleep regression time so don't panic if her night time sleep becomes way more disturbed too.

DD - when she went to 1 nap at 15 months
DS - when he went to 2 naps at 9 months, first one of the day was only ever 30 minutes though.

I'd put your app down and follow your baby's lead. Chances are you might not get a longer nap for ages but at least you won't be driven slowly mad by wake windows and expectations based on what an app or a book is telling you.

Delete the app immediately.

At that age, your baby will probably fall asleep after a feed or with a little cuddle/rock. They might take 4 or 5 naps a day of varying length and you'll rarely be able to predict how long each one will be.

Lean into it. Relax and enjoy your baby. Don't stress about naps or sleep, there's no joy to be found there.

Are the short naps actually a problem? Some babies just prefer lots of shorter naps.

My LO has short naps on the whole, with one longer nap in the afternoon.

She sleeps well at night so I’m not stressing about it, just taking her lead.

Her wake windows are fairly consistent at about 1 hr 45 mins. She’s 11 weeks.

@Mushroo I'd say they're a problem because when she wakes up after 20 ish minutes she starts getting cranky because she's still tired. Yesterday morning by some miracle she did have a longer 2hr nap and she was in a much better mood all day. However, all other days where she has these short naps she's very cranky. Doesn't want to do tummy time etc either.

She just cries x

@user666555 bless her! If the crib works I’d keep doing that for a couple of naps so at least she’s not over tired.

We have the opposite problem - she naps fine in the pram and on me (usually about an hour) but attempting the cot normally only gets me about 20 mins.

I think just lean into what works whilst they’re so little

my first catnapped until she went to 1 afternoon nap at about 12 months. My second is only 21 weeks but seems to like a longer nap. He's pretty textbook when it comes to Huckleberry though (didn't use it for first) it's set to either 3 or 4 naps and he usually gets grumpy in 'the sweet spot' and will have a nap. I'll stop using it soon once he has more predictable naps but I've found it really useful to not have to keep clock watching and second guessing if he's tired enough to sleep or not

She will be getting much better quality naps in her cot so definitely do that if she will go down happily (that’s amazing in itself for many!). Likely she has just outgrown the swing sleeping now she is more alert and can’t get herself through the light phase of sleep at 30/45mins. Night sleep won’t be affected.

Sorry not helpful I know but my 11 month old has pretty much done 30 min naps since about 10 weeks and still does 😬 she sleeps well overnight but just does 2 x 30 min naps in the day. It’s the same length if in cot or pram. Or sofa.

Sometimes she might have a longer afternoon one but that’s rare, and she can be a bit cranky later if that happens.

Your baby might grow out of it but some babies just have low sleep needs. Mine is one of them.

Personally I would try to accept it and be pleasantly surprised if it improves, one thing I found torturous about baby sleep was telling myself ‘she might get better next month/next growth spurt’ etc and then being disappointed when nothing changed. I found it easier to accept my baby and her ways than hope they changed. I just run around like a mad woman tidying up for the thirty minutes she’s asleep, or accept the chores can wait and treat myself to a cuppa and a biscuit 😄

As an example she woke up at 1:07 from her nap and is now falling asleep again (48 mins later) however she started getting cranky around half an hour after waking. So it feels as though she's constantly having mini naps, waking, getting cranky then wanting another nap within the hour.

When he was about 17 months. If I was you I'd just roll with it and stop hoping for it
Mine was the same, short naps and wake up tired and crying/grumpy.
I tried crib60 it didn't work - he'd just cry hysterically if I didn't get him.

@teksab exactly! When I first downloaded the app it was more to track her feeds. However, I found the sweet spot feature really useful. Back then she'd have much longer naps. Then suddenly for the past 3ish weeks she's been having these 30 min catnaps and is just cranky ALL day due to being tired. I feel like she'll be behind with things like tummy time and strengthening her neck muscles etc because she's always so cranky that I can hardly put her down for tummy time without her crying hysterically.

He's 20 months now and usually has a 2.5 hour nap in the day and wakes up so happy and cheery, it's such a contrast 😀
I'm so used to him waking up crying and me having to spend about an hour singing to him to cheer him up and get him out of that exhausted/cranky stage.

My son hasn’t ever slept much in the day. He’s 6 months now and generally has 2 naps, morning and afternoon. Sometimes just 1. They can
be anything from 20 minutes to an
hour. He sleeps 12 hours at night now with one wake. We got into this routine just naturally, I’ve never done any sleep training or anything like that. Breastfed so always just fed
and napped as he pleased. Just could be an option to try and see if baby makes their own routine.

I find if he has had a 'crap nap', then I do need to bring the next one forward a bit. It's frustrating but I've found since 4 months he has lengthened his naps a bit- specially the lunchtime one where he'll have a good 2 hours. We have not mastered cot naps yet though! I currently let him nap on walks or on me while I watch tv

I remember longing for a longer nap with my DD. I just looked it up and she did her first long daytime nap at 19 weeks old. It was when I put her down in her travel cot (with a proper cot mattress) rather than her next to me crib. She was a big baby. I think a more comfortable surface made all the difference to her.

I feel like she'll be behind with things like tummy time and strengthening her neck muscles etc because she's always so cranky that I can hardly put her down for tummy time without her crying hysterically

OP, the ONLY point of "tummy time" is to ensure babies don't spend all their lives lying flat on their backs. ANY time not doing his counts as "tummy time" - time lying on your chest, time being cuddled, time in a sling. You do not need to put her down alone on her front on the floor or a mat or whatever AT ALL. She's clearly communicating to you that she doesn't like it, so I'd stop it right away 🙂

What about a motion nap in the buggy or car?
Sometimes my son (now 21mo) would get into this pattern you describe of poor quality short naps, waking unrefreshed, going into next nap cranky and overtired, repeat repeat. I found if I spent a couple of days doing something different to really get good naps, things went back to normal and he could then nap in the crib happily again for 45 mins or so. So I'd do every nap in the buggy or car or sling with very short wake windows so as not to miss the crucial window to go to sleep happy rather than overtired. I understand you can't use the sling, what about her dad over the weekend?

Have had an absolute nightmares with the naps today. She's been so unsettled, straight after her little 30 min catnap she'll become fussy again within half an hour and rub her eyes and yawn etc. No idea what I'm doing wrong but it's SO tiring.

DP works 7 days a week as I only get maternity allowance and financially he's taking care of everything which means he has to work 7 days a week.

Have no other help, I'm drained mentally and physically. I just feel as though I have an unhappy baby and it's my fault (I cried a lot during pregnancy due to various factors). She also has CMPA and we've just changed her milk as a hydrolysed formula wasn't working