Colleague stole my chair and is eating monster munch

[spanieleyes22]

Ok the chair thing I sort of get - we don't have our own desks just hot desk but i was at this desk yesterday and this morning the chair was gone - so I'm left with a wonky chair. Management problem really there are not enough "working chairs". The monster munch is getting on my nerves though. So noisy wit the packet and then the chewing and it's v early for eating that kind of stuff isn't it .

In a past life I was involved in an employment tribunal where one of the complaints was that colleagues gave the complainant filthy looks when he was eating his two egg sandwiches breakfast at his desk each morning 😂

Yes, monster munch early in morning is bordering on perversion. A double gin and tonic, on the other hand, is perfectly acceptable, so have one and the chair will not seem so wonky!

Do you have a Facilities team? If so go and see them, take food for them and they'll sort you out.

Swap the chair back the minute they leave the desk, and deny all knowledge, whilst eating Quavers with an air of extreme insolence.

I once told an ex that his feet looked like giant Monster Munch.

I regret nothing.

Microwave some fish.

Oh fuck that! Someone did that at work last week and honestly it smelled like someone died. And then the arsehole opened the kitchen door to let it air!

So the whole floor stunk of death.

too late today but nab a good chair on Monday.

I think they were joking.

Would I steal the chair when they went to the bathroom?

I absolutely would.

But also… start applying for new jobs, as you have one or both of the following problems:

1. Management only give a shit about profits and not employees (if you can hot desk, I feel like that means, you could easily work from home, especially if you’re working on laptops, AND if they don’t give a fuck half or your chairs are broken) OR
2. Management don’t have the money to replace the broken chairs or shitty desks, in which case, get out of that sinking ship ASAP, for the safety of your bank account and your back.

Good luck, OP. It’s a fucking Monster Munch-scented jungle out there.

It's supposed to be totes hilaires thread and we're supposed to be weeing on our children, waking our babies with our guffaws and spitting tea on our keyboards.

I think you kinda misunderstood the concept of hot decking, just as you had the desk yesterday doesn’t mean it’s yours today 😂

What a cracking breakfast!

They ABU for not sharing the monster munch.

Bastards

Sadly i suspect the OP is actually serious. Some people do seem to make fusses over nothing very much at work, though the H&S workstation issues need addressing.

There's a Victoria Wood sketch in this somewhere...

Assert dominance: Giant multipack of Doritos (with dips!) and a box of Maltesers.

The best!

Someone told me it was too early to eat a Twix at 11.30 am. WTF? It was an hour later than my usual morning chocolate bar and only 15 minutes before I usually have lunch.

Your employer has to supply items that are required for the job. If they won't provide proper safe chairs contact union asap