To think there’s not much you can do about early wakings

[Toooooearly]

DS woke at 530 for a year and it nearly killed me. I tried all the gro clock, treat as a night waking, later bedtime and so on and it didn’t work. He sleeps slightly later now but not much. Now the second one has started. AIBU to think some children just do wake very early 😴

Sorry that was in answer to PP who said all kids do this - not just a statement of smugness!

A wise friend of mine once said that children are either larks or owls and that never changes (until they have children of their own and become programmed to get up). DD has always been a lark. No matter what time you put her to bed she’ll be up at 5.30 am. Friends wouldn’t believe me but there is nothing you can do to stop her waking at 5.30. It’s just the time her brain tells her to wake up. We have all learned to live with it!

Mine both went through a phase of waking at 4am which was horrendous. 5.30 was the norm for years. I always used to wake at 6am even though my parents were real night owls - going to bed 2 or 3am. I'm sure genetics play a strong part.

I had two years of never sleeping past 5.30 am. Gro Clock didn’t work, as I did not have an obedient toddler. I am lucky that I am good with 6 hours’ sleep, though. I would just do stuff early in the morning that most people do in the evening (cleaning, laundry, etc) and made the best of it. DS is year 1 now and sleeps until 6.30 most days, although he gets excited at weekends and is usually up by 6am.

I think shifting the whole day later is the only thing that works. People put their toddler to bed at 7 but lots of toddlers can't sleep more than ten hours so wake at 5.

Those on this thread who say a later bedtime doesn't work, have you actually tried putting your toddler to bed at 9 following a 7.30 dinner for at least 3 weeks?

In real life people value their child free evening too much to do this!

I can assure you not many children in Spain or Portugal for example are waking up at that time, it's cultural habits, not inherent to the children! But then of course they're not having dinner at 5pm or being in bed at 7 or 8pm....

One of mine was a 5 o'clocker for years. Eventually grew out of it only to start swimming competitively so needs to be up for training at 5 am five times a week 😩

I have three kids under 6 and if they stay asleep past 6.30am it’s a good day 😂😂 they used to wake up at 5am though so I’m taking this as a win!

Yes exactly, this is what we do and they never wake before 7.

@Fairyliz my DD never woke up early. I always had to wake her up. Some kids are sleepers.

It was this that made me decide I was one and done.Hated those horrific early morning wake ups.

This thread makes me feel slightly better about my owl kids. We sometimes sleep in until 9 on a weekend.
On the flip side my 4 yo can stay up until 10 quite happily 😅

My son woke at 5.30 every morning till he started primary school at age 5. Didn't matter what we tried he was still awake. We adjusted our own sleep pattern so we were rested and not exhausted. It worked out fine

I don’t want to seem arrogant, but no.
my 2 yo wakes around 7am. Sometimes even 8, usually 7. Always has done, except of course when he was a newborn.

however some nights given naps, what we’ve done that day etc, sometimes he won’t go off until close to 9pm.

Agree!!!!

a lot of people seem to think a 7pm bedtime, or even earlier, is ‘ideal’ for babies and toddlers.
eh? Then by the time it’s been 10 hours you’re looking at 5am!

people have to resort to the fact of if you want an entire evening to yourself, you are going to get a horribly early wake up. Toddlers can only sleep a certain amount of hours!

there are of course, exceptions

I think it's always worth trying things, but some children just don't sleep well. Between the ages of 1 and 4 DD went down around 11pm-1pm, woke during the night, and would be ready for the day around 6-7 (though there was the particularly wonderful patch when she went down at midnight and was regularly up and out at 5am). I had it up to here with people telling me if I only let her sleep later (when?!) she'd be better in the mornings, or, conversely, that if I only got her to sleep in (how?!) she'd go down earlier.

The good news is that she is rising 7 now, and these days goes down between 9 and 10, and reliably sleeps through to 7 most days.

The average toddler needs 12-13 hours sleep every 24 hours. If you've got an early riser after an 8-10 hour stint and they still nap in the day, it might be time to phase the day naps out.

DS1 was a dream sleeper. He did 7-7 (and occasionally much later) from a fairly young age. How smug we were

DS2 essentially didn't sleep for the first 2 years. We tried everything to no avail. In fact, I was so broken I can't even remember how we eventually got to the point where, 14 years later, he'll sleep in till 10 am on Saturdays.

Incidentally, DS 2 the non-sleeper, suffered from night terrors from age 2 - 8. I don't think it's a coincidence that he had a sleep disorder and was a dreadful sleeper as a baby.

Maybe I’m bucking the trend a bit, I’m a single mum by choice and I am a bit lazy by nature, as in not a morning person and like a lie in….if my daughter woke at 5.30/6am I would feed her and put her straight back down again and I just didn’t entertain getting up at that time at all….as a baby she’d then sleep on until 9/9.30 and now she’s 8 and she sleeps until 9 on a weekend. I do empathise with those who don’t have good sleepers but I kind of think she learned to stay in bed from being a newborn…we are both very active but we’re not morning people at all

This.
It's either long child-free evenings or later wake ups. I chose the latter, hands down. The thought of arriving at work having been awake for 4 hours already... no WAY

My eldest always woke at 4am, it did not matter what time he went to bed, how busy/relaxed our days were, he simply did not sleep past 4am. And he didn’t take any coming round either, he was bright eyed and bushy tailed from the get go. I remember sitting and waiting for CBeebies to start! But he was an absolute angel and so smart so would happily play and do puzzles quietly etc It was like his brain just would not switch off for very long. He would also politely ask to go play football and get outside at around 4.30am which I would politely decline until we got to a more reasonable hour.

Over the years he started to wake closer to 5am and once slept until 9.30! I got so much done that morning but checked on him frequently as I honestly thought something was wrong with him. He’s 14 now and is a pro at getting up for secondary school without any help from us and I’d say over the past 18months, he will sometimes sleep in (on weekends) until about 7.30am! Very rarely he’ll sleep until about 10am!

He was diagnosed as autistic at 11 and he has crippling OCD so he has a strict toileting and personal hygiene routine/ritual he follows each morning which takes a lot of time so his early wakings are now a necessity for that (OCD was diagnosed at age 6). His OCD makes my heart break for him, he is such a wonderful boy and I wish I could take that away from him.

I totally agree with this. And you can change when children go to bed and sleep, but you have to do it gradually.
Or do peoples children not adjust to clocks changing either?

i think a lot of babies / kids wake up early. Mine never has, and would stay in bed all day. He doesn’t go to bed early either, and has been like that since tiny. There would be no point in bringing him, as he’s just not ready for sleep (naps aren’t even a factor in this). My sister’s son is like clockwork 6.30 bedtime, up at 6.30 or earlier. She thinks we’re crazy!

My waking hours still revolve around my kids and my eldest is 15. He's up at 6:30 every morning because he always has to shower and do his hair before school. He slams his bedroom door, bathroom door, airing cupboard door, elephant feet up and down the stairs. There is zero point telling him off, he's just living life and is loud. I adjust my bedtime accordingly.