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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Lurking man, should I report the odd behaviour?

53 replies

deeplyspanish · 07/03/2024 22:38

So I live on the outskirts of a small city, residential area.
DH works from home, I work part time and study so we're both around a lot during the day and our house looks out onto the main road through our area.
For the last few months we've noticed a man who is always hanging around the area. He's there when the kids go off to school and is there until 5/6pm.
He has 3 different vehicles that he drives, alternating daily, sometimes swaps vehicles during the day. He parks nearby for short spells, drives 5ish times round the block, then parks in a slightly different space, sometimes right outside my house. Occasionally, he'll be there when I open my bedroom curtains and immediately drive away, only to return 10 minutes later.
He also parks a bit further away, then walks round and round, lurks near my garage, lingers in neighbours drive ways, looking around constantly. Always wearing a cap and shades.
One of his vehicles has blacked out windows, and he'll sit in the back seat for hours.
When he drives round and round He's often on his phone and almost knocked DH off his bike the other day.
WTF??? Other than the phone thing (that I have no proof of in terms of photo evidence), he's not technically doing anything illegal or anything, but it's freaking me out and pissing us off!
The odd thing is that he seems to stick to office hours. I've never been a regular hour kind of worker so I don't think this is to do with me or my family but is he stalking someone who works nearby?
The question is, do I 101 and report this or am I being a Karen and just getting narked by an innocent (although weird) man??

OP posts:
Honeydew19 · 08/03/2024 10:41

@Sapphire387 I agree. I did find some information regarding it

Physical surveillance
In some cases, the DWP chooses to physically surveil people. They are expected to record in details the purpose of their surveillance mission and their observations, as below.

Amount of time observations carried out
Distance from person observed
Visibility
Obstructions to sight
Known or seen before
Time between observations and recording for example, reasons for delays in recording
Errors or discrepancies for example, differences from description given.”

The surveillance team can gather photo and video evidence.

swayingpalmtree · 08/03/2024 10:42

Sapphire387 · 08/03/2024 10:35

Jeez. What an utter waste of resources if this is true. Would cost more in wages of that member of staff than the amount of 'benefits' fraudulently claimed, surely.

Maybe thats why he's so bad at it- they chose the cheapest option they could find 😂

deeplyspanish · 08/03/2024 11:06

There is a factory sort of place just down the road, so maybe that's what he's watching. He's been lurking for months and months though, like probably since the end of summer!

OP posts:
fabio12 · 08/03/2024 11:15

I'd report him anyway - if he is a DWP investigator presumably they need to know he is shit at it. My worry is that he might be stalking an ex, and we all know how that can turn out. He clearly doesn't want to be seen in the area as you say.

I had an experience in the woods last week with a man dressed head to toe in black lycra including full head balaclava (!) standing stock still with his arms out to his side. I walked along a path behind him for a good 4mins assuming he would move, but nope. I then did a loop of another 15/20mins and came back and he was still there silently rooted to the spot, not even turning his head as I went past. Another couple passing a bit further on asked what it was all about as all of us thought it was odd. I mean, what do you do in these situations?

swayingpalmtree · 08/03/2024 11:18

I had an experience in the woods last week with a man dressed head to toe in black lycra including full head balaclava (!) standing stock still with his arms out to his side

Sure it wasn't a scarecrow?

ButWhatAboutTheBees · 08/03/2024 11:22

It sounds odd and if you have concerns do report (especially as he uses his phone whilst driving and has nearly caused an accident)

If he knows he's been clocked though, it does seem unusual for him to keep returning if he's up to no good.

fabio12 · 08/03/2024 11:23

That is exactly what he looked like and the couple and I joked that we had thought it was a scarecrow until we got closer and saw it was a man, with a bag etc. So weird!

fabio12 · 08/03/2024 11:24

ButWhatAboutTheBees · 08/03/2024 11:22

It sounds odd and if you have concerns do report (especially as he uses his phone whilst driving and has nearly caused an accident)

If he knows he's been clocked though, it does seem unusual for him to keep returning if he's up to no good.

That's what worries me about it, as if he can't resist. If it's not for work it's a compulsive thing...

swayingpalmtree · 08/03/2024 11:24

fabio12 · 08/03/2024 11:23

That is exactly what he looked like and the couple and I joked that we had thought it was a scarecrow until we got closer and saw it was a man, with a bag etc. So weird!

How weird, that would have freaked me out too!

Sapphire387 · 08/03/2024 11:26

Honeydew19 · 08/03/2024 10:41

@Sapphire387 I agree. I did find some information regarding it

Physical surveillance
In some cases, the DWP chooses to physically surveil people. They are expected to record in details the purpose of their surveillance mission and their observations, as below.

Amount of time observations carried out
Distance from person observed
Visibility
Obstructions to sight
Known or seen before
Time between observations and recording for example, reasons for delays in recording
Errors or discrepancies for example, differences from description given.”

The surveillance team can gather photo and video evidence.

Fuck's sake. I should make it clear I am not committing benefit fraud but it makes me glad I have a concealed front door within a block that has multiple entrances!

Anyway OP, I would report to 101. It looks wrong to you, and it has been months now. It's really creepy.

starfishmummy · 08/03/2024 13:07

Do you have neighbourhood watch? Chat to tjem. Also where I am there's a neighbourhood policeman who does "surgeries" we could chat to about it. Anything like that where you are?

Candymay · 08/03/2024 13:08

deeplyspanish · 08/03/2024 10:19

Thanks all. I don't think it's drugs, I also thought maybe he'd lost his job and was pretending to work, but it's the different vehicles that confuses me.
Re neighbours, we're the only house with the right angle of view that could see him, but I will check just in case.
We did think about asking him directly, but if he sees us, he immediately drives off, so we never get near him!
It's been going on for a few months now, same pattern - weekdays, work hours, so maybe private detective? Although he's really crap a stealth if he is!

What if you crawl along the pavement hugging the curb and then only stand up when you’re next to the window. What would he say then?

Shesmyhero · 08/03/2024 13:14

I would report it - there was a man who looked like he was stalking someone and I was able to send photos and the police dealt with it straight away.

deeplyspanish · 08/03/2024 13:40

fabio12 · 08/03/2024 11:15

I'd report him anyway - if he is a DWP investigator presumably they need to know he is shit at it. My worry is that he might be stalking an ex, and we all know how that can turn out. He clearly doesn't want to be seen in the area as you say.

I had an experience in the woods last week with a man dressed head to toe in black lycra including full head balaclava (!) standing stock still with his arms out to his side. I walked along a path behind him for a good 4mins assuming he would move, but nope. I then did a loop of another 15/20mins and came back and he was still there silently rooted to the spot, not even turning his head as I went past. Another couple passing a bit further on asked what it was all about as all of us thought it was odd. I mean, what do you do in these situations?

Omg!!!!! I'd not be back in those woods anytime soon!!!

OP posts:
deeplyspanish · 08/03/2024 14:07

Right, reported to 101. I'll update if anything happens. Thanks all.

OP posts:
Trulyme · 08/03/2024 16:12

It sounds as though he is working and it’s more convenient for him to be close to that area.

GasPanic · 08/03/2024 16:35

Sounds strange. I would be surprised if he was a PI, as they probably charge by the day and it would cost a fair amount of money to hang around for that long without producing some sort of result.

Three different cars suggests some significant resources though. Did you try putting the plates in to see the tax and mot status ? What sort of cars are they ? All relatively new and well maintained looking or a variety of age and types ?

BrokenBonesStixStones · 08/03/2024 16:45

Could he be a PI watching someone?

BrokenBonesStixStones · 08/03/2024 16:45

Maybe for insurance fraud?

SailingStormyWaters · 08/03/2024 16:45

He is a car dealer?
Doing it on the quiet?
My old neighbour dealt in second hand cars, he was forever moving them around as didn't have enough space to park them all. Is he waiting for a customer to come and view them, if they're dodgy, he won't want to sell outside his own home. He will pretend he lives where he's parked the car.

ALongHardWinter · 08/03/2024 17:04

swayingpalmtree · 08/03/2024 11:18

I had an experience in the woods last week with a man dressed head to toe in black lycra including full head balaclava (!) standing stock still with his arms out to his side

Sure it wasn't a scarecrow?

This was my first thought!

JennyForeigner · 08/03/2024 17:11

It's drugs - bet you.

We were nearly hit by a very boring looking car flying down our road. I was so angry I followed it and reported that the driver was parked at the end of our street.

The police eventually came back to us and explained that the cars are leased and parked on a shift system. You do your 8 hours, hand over whatever and then the car moves on so the risk of a particular license plate or whatever being badged as a drug car owned in someone's name is much lower. They had picked our area as a convenient base for people to come to and collect their stuff.

In our case an arrest was made and then led to a bunch more and a big thank you for calling it in from the police.

theemmadilemma · 08/03/2024 17:15

Could be drugs. He could be mtg people as he drives around quickly.

deeplyspanish · 08/03/2024 18:05

GasPanic · 08/03/2024 16:35

Sounds strange. I would be surprised if he was a PI, as they probably charge by the day and it would cost a fair amount of money to hang around for that long without producing some sort of result.

Three different cars suggests some significant resources though. Did you try putting the plates in to see the tax and mot status ? What sort of cars are they ? All relatively new and well maintained looking or a variety of age and types ?

1 van, 1 fancy electric, 1 SUV. All new ish, very well maintained. Only ever those 3 cars though, and he's never out of them long. I didn't know you could put plates in to check those things, might try that.

OP posts:
deeplyspanish · 08/03/2024 18:07

I just want to bloody know what he's doing!!!! It's driving me mad wondering. If nothing comes of 101 I'm going to have to sneak up on him and ask 😬.

OP posts: