Kid keeps picking flowers from garden bushes - shall I say something?

[Primmyhill]

The last few days a girl, about 7 years old, and her mum have stopped outside my house, presumably on the walk back from school, and have reached over the railings and picked some flowers from some of my hedges. Today she must have picked about 10 and then dropped them in the street while walking off. Am I being petty to be p’eed off? I don’t want to seem like an ogre and upset a child if it keeps happening, but surely an adult should be teaching the child that this is someone’s property and not encourage it. AIBU?

Sorry, you're right, it was @HelloMiss who didn't believe there were any flowers out in the UK at the moment.

I take your point, but taking the longer term view - interacting with flowers, including picking them when they're abundant (and Plantlife's "pick 1 flower out of every 20 rule is a good one) will mean you have children growing up valuing them, and that in turn makes it more likely that their habitats will be cherished. If they're told to keep off, they will lose interest, and once they are the generation who are voting, it will be easier for flower rich habitats to be destroyed.

Thanks everyone. As I thought, but my very laid back husband said, ‘oh, but they’re just flowers that will fall off and die soon, at least she’s getting some pleasure from them’ That’s not the point though, he doesn’t get it.
I’ll keep a look out today and will be ready to pounce - will go in polite but will up the ante if I need to!
For those that asked, there’s a variety - camellia, blossom and some small yellow flowers on a hedge but I’m not sure what they’re called.

Please don’t “pounce”. I used to let my non verbal ds walk along the top of a low bank outside some houses where there was no pavement. It was a poor choice on my part but it got him to school safe and happy. One day one of the owners came out and asked us not to really crossly. Ds was terrified and also didn’t understand. The knock on fall out was horrific. If you could just say it calmly I’m sure the mum will be really embarrassed and change.

I agree with your husband @Primmyhill
We should be encouraging children to experience nature. I know it might be annoying if the child drops them after picking them but as your husband says, flowers drop naturally anyway.

Say something.
I absolutely hate passers-by attacking my hydrangea. The stems and branches are of the flexible, stringy kind and don't break easily, so at some point there are wilting, half-broken flower heads just hanging on the pavement side.
People are fuckwits.

Can we only experience nature by picking it and discarding it to die, then?

No @fitzwilliamdarcy

YANBU OP. I see this happen all over - the worst at National Trust places with parents watching fondly or taking photos as their kids pull out all the flowers.

There are some keen gardeners on my estate and woe betide the parent who doesn’t step in and prevent their kids from pulling up flowers. Which is as it should be - if parents aren’t going to do any parenting then don’t complain when someone else does.

Do it for the bees. Say
Please don't pick my flowers they are there specifically for the bees and for everyone to enjoy

This is terrible that the mother is standing by and allowing it! It is stealing. It just is. Children have to be taught, and to learn.

Here's my story - I used to walk along a quiet residential road to primary school. I don't know what age I was, maybe 7. Anyway I saw a flower - a hyacinth I think - in someone's garden rockery and thought my mum would like it, and picked it and took it home. Instead of delight I got a lecture about stealing and she marched me straight down to the house, stood at the bottom of the drive and made me go up and ring the doorbell. I was terrified but I did it. A woman answered and I told her I'd taken it for my mum but now realised I shouldn't have. She took it back but was a bit bemused I think, and said it was fine. But there you go - lesson learned!

Wait outside tomorrow. Ideally spring up from behind the bush and ask them to stop.

This.

I can't believe how some pp are blatantly missing the point here. It's your private property and no-one has a right to take it from your garden. We planted Laurels in the front of our house which took several years to establish well. One day I caught a teen standing idly picking the leaves off them and dropping them on the floor, I told her to stop as they were private property. What's even odder in your case op is that mum is helping this child and then letting her discard them in the street, they weren't even taking them home to put in water or anything! Definitely say something and make it clear you're not happy.

What's the relevance of this anecdote?

I’d go mad. Camelia’s are so pretty you don’t want the flowers just abandoned.

Definitely say something

I would kill with kindness. Since you know the time they pass by give them a lovely bunch of flowers and say I noticed you like the flowers on my bush. Please don't pick too many or the bush won't look pretty any more.

If someone picked all the flowers off my camellia I would be raging!

Your husband is wrong. The flowers are there for everyone to enjoy - in situ. People can’t go around taking whatever they want.

Hide behind and shout get off my flowers....

That telling the mother without “pouncing” or sounding angry would be a good plan. Honestly in hindsight I can see we were being annoying and it wasn’t a good idea but at the time I was just doing the best I could. I would imagine flower picking child’s mum thought it was a fun thing to do and “no harm”, but it’s obviously not what OP wants going forward.

😂

Water pistol and say sorry thought there was a cat 🐈‍⬛ 😜

There you go again! 😂😂

I have the same issues once my peonys flower at our front wall, we live near 3 schools, so along with enjoying having my drive blocked I also get my flowers picked. Feels petty to be annoyed but a lot of love and nuture goes into my garden, and others just come along and remove them before I have a chance to enjoy them!

Oh give over Miss Trunchbull! 😂. Bit far don't you think.

I'm in UK. We see roses, daisies, daffodils, crocuses and many other flowers on a daily basis. We blew at a dandelion yesterday. Granted, we live rural so less damage from cities and pollution. Many people are totally disconnected from nature. They look at the man-made calender and assume they know what nature is supposed to be doing.