I'm the oldest in my job

[Kjones27]

I just turned forty. And I just started a new job.

I'm the oldest by a good bit. I'd say the second oldest is 28, and the majority are around 25.

This is the first time this has happened to me. Usually there were people older than me in the job.

Obviously I'm getting older, and this is part of getting older. That I will begin to be one of the older colleagues.

However this is the first time its happened to me. I'm not sure how to socially navigate. They obviously all have more in common with each other, so they chat to each other. They're not rude to me. But I think they just see me as different and kind of leave me out.

What did you do when you became the oldest in a job, to make it easier?

They’re also a lot cheaper! I’m the oldest in my office and a similar age as you. I don’t tend to socialise with my team anymore which I used to really enjoy.

My friends are equally split older/younger than me about 5-10 years either side, though.

After he said he was the old man of the team, what did you say?

I work in a Building Society, in the Head Office. There is a complete mix of ages in my department and around the building. I’m 46 and there are plenty of people older than me.

I wonder if you work in a ‘new’ bank eg like Monzo, rather than somewhere traditional with long term staff.

Most people here don’t tend to leave the organisation. There are lots of internal moves, but most people stay here until retirement!

I'm also the oldest at 55. Next is 45.
After that they are all 20's.
I feel ancient.

It's weird. I'm 40 and about average age in my place but the boss is in her mid 20s. Very mid 20s shall we say too. It's like a teenager in the room. But maybe that's 40?

I've got this in my new job-I'm
In week 3. I'm finding it a bit lonely-they are all nice enough but I'm not included at lunch or whatever (not that I would expect to be) and having never had that before it's a bit discombobulating. At times I find them a bit immature and a tad annoying as well (though very careful not to show it). Hopefully I will get used to it and they will get used to me. We'll see.

The last job I worked in I started at 54.
I worked in my profession until retirement age and was proud to do so, usually with much younger people. I had an enormous breadth of knowledge which can only come with age and experience. I didn’t really socialise much with the others out of work, but found that I was in demand in work for help with difficult issues. It really didn’t bother me as I had plenty of friends outside of work. I think as long as you have other interests outside work it shouldn’t matter, OP.
But I do look at team photos now and wonder where all the older people are. Do they all take early retirement?

You can only be yourself and that, including your age and life experience, brings unique qualities to the place and the work. See it as a positive - not a negative. Age doesn’t come on its own 😊

I've had this when returning to work after a break and I sympathise. My strategy was just to crack on- be friendly and chatty with colleagues and unembarrassed about the age difference, eg I'd ask my colleague her weekend plans and she would be going clubbing and she's ask me mine and I was taking DC to softplay 😂 And it's fine, no one cares. I think it's really tempting to project your own feelings about age onto other people but generally no one is thinking about it as much as you are (or that's what I used to tell myself!)

No, I’ve never been in that situation. But I can’t imagine thinking about it like that, I don’t care what age people are. I’m regularly the youngest or the oldest in the room for some meetings, but wouldn’t fixate on it.

My workplace has people aged 21 to 70. Most are in their 20s and 30s however. I don’t give it much thought. I just have a bit of a laugh and chat to any Tom dick or Harry

I work in Data Insights and Transformation for the NHS, and the age range is early 20s up to 60ish. I'm 44, so smack bang in the middle. My 4 closest friends are 29, 30, 50 and 55. Not many of my colleagues are younger than me though, so I still feel young 😁

I worked in a young sector I get what you’re saying

In my team the ages range from 35-60. Although we have the same boss we do different roles (all heads of various departments). I think because I’ve been with my company for a while, my peers have also risen up through the ranks so it feels about right. I socialise with people in their 20s and 60s (I’m in the middle) and have no issue with it, we have a great time.

I haven’t yet had a boss who is younger than me, it shouldn’t be an issue if I do, but I know I’d find it weird (I may have a bit of an issue with authority in general!).

About your point about people feeling old, some people definitely do! Especially in here, I see posts such as, ‘I couldn’t dream of having a baby after 36, I’m so old and tired’, or, ‘I can’t possibly meet a friend in town for a drink at 20.00, I’m too old for that!’.

It's disappointing that your organisation obviously doesn't know the meaning of the word diversity if they don't have older members of staff.

A diverse and healthy blend of experience and people starting out on their career plus some in mid-career really creates a vibrant and supportive workforce.

it's one reason I'm glad to work for the Civil Service, they're really good at it.

Even if it's so called "young industry" eg creative arts, advertising, marketing, there will be a load of talent in the older age bracket that they're missing out on. Their loss!

I'm not sure if I'm the oldest, but probably am now I think about it. I'm 57. It doesn't bother me. I make jokes about my knees and when talking about music, films, news events from the 70s, 80s and 90s say "before your time dear." Mind you I am sometimes shocked that people I expect them to know, they don't. The day Shane McGowan died, I said I was sad but had it expected it for years and they're all "Shane Who?" Another time I told a colleague that Jarvis Cocker, John Lydon and Kathy Burke were on my Fantasy Dinner Party Guest List and she had no idea who any of them were!!!

Mind you they like the fact I'm very experienced in the field.

Yes it’s bad to exclude older people. I’ve missed out on working with people over fifty generally

I'm still in the middle at 40yo.

Oldest is almost 60, youngest ones can be early 20s upwards. I feel I bridge the gap quite well and can relate to both.

I feel strange no longer being the young one though.....

My hiring manager for this job looked about 23.

Soon I'll start to sound like my mother who said to me "they gave me a doctor who looked like he was just out of school"

I'm quite a bit (10 years plus) older than most of my colleagues, I'm also in quite cutting edge tech because I've constantly developed my skills. So there are quite a lot of younger people in my field as older people haven't necessarily kept up with the changes. I never let it worry me. I'm good at what I do and I don't feel the need to be sociable with people from work though. I have friendships outside of work, I just have a professional relationship with those in work.

in the non profit section I’ve found!

I'm a nurse. The oldest in my team is 72. There are others who are late 60s too. There are about 6 or 7 in my team who are of pension age. The youngest people in my time are late 30s,

About 3 years ago a longstanding colleague retired. A couple of months later I was sitting in a team meeting and realised that I had more experience in my role than everyone else in my team put together, including the team leader. Coupled with losing out on the Team Leader job to someone literally half my age, I decided it was time to move on. 2 years later I am two grades more senior.

I sort of smiled and said not any more. We got on well and there was never an age problem. Well my line manager had to have a 1 to 1 with me (and everyone else) once a month, a standard question was "What are you ambitions in this comany?". I used to reply that my ambition was to stay in my rather junior post until I retired.
I had dropped from a salary of a bit over £34,000 a year to the living wage and my responsibilites and stress dropped even more dramatically.

In accountancy it's sadly still commonplace for older people to be "managed out" to make space for the younger people to be incentivised to climb up the pyramid.