To have rushed to the school or am I a neurotic parent??

[WanderingAroundandAround]

DS is 13 and was diagnosed with Type I diabetes 18 months ago. He manages it well in general but regularly ignores low blood sugars until he’s in a hypo. He has a blood sugar monitor and we try to drill into him to treat (with glucose) if he’s going towards a low rather than wait until he’s in one as obviously he feels like crap and it can cause long term effects if he regularly hypos.

Today I got a notification from his monitor that he was in a low and going further down, he also still had a couple of units of insulin onboard. I normally keep checking to make sure he’s treated it and is starting to go up again but he continued going down to 2.7 which is dangerously low. Lowest should be 4. I called the school to ask them to check he’s treated it and make sure he eats a decent amount to counteract the insulin he still had inside him.

They said they’d get him. He continued going down to 2.2 15 minutes later (lowest he’s ever been) at which point I panicked, jumped into car and drive to school with his glycogen injection (school have one but have had it since diagnosis and didn’t know if it was mislaid or whatever), ready to inject as expecting to have to call 999 and DS unconscious!

Got to Reception and said why I was there. The monitor was registering DS as off the scale low at that point. DH had called in as well from work as we were both panicking! Receptionist clearly raised her eyebrows as if to say that I was overreacting. I said she didn’t need to raise her eyebrows as it was a life threatening emergency. She denied doing it and said she was sorry if I thought she had. Kind of thinking now was I was rude but I was very stressed and know how serious it is, a lot of people don’t.

DS then came out with medical lady, who was a bit WTF, and he was laughing and saying I’m fine and very embarrassed saying why did you come to school! Looks like his monitor was wrong which is rare. Medical lady said it was natural that I was a bit anxious as still getting to grips with diagnosis. We have got to grips with it but he was in a life threatening hypo according to his monitor! I think I was right to be extremely worried.

Left feeling rather embarrassed and like I will judged as a neurotic mother and as if I caused a bit of an unnecessary kerfuffle with the receptionist.

I have never gone into school before because DS has gone into a low. Only called once before as he was very high for a long period.

Was I being neurotic? WWYD in that situation.

I started reading this thread earlier and have just had time to come back to it. I only had to read your first sentence to say "you're not neurotic"; as others have said you will always be right to be cautious, triple check things, make contact etc etc.

It sounds like this is a good opportunity to sit down and have several conversations around "what would we want to happen next time?" - so, sit down with your son and explore what he thinks should have happened, what he did and didn't do and why, what he could have done. And then have a conversation with the school - and with your diabetes nurse/team as well. A mix of knowing who should be contacting who, and when, and hopefully helping your son and key staff memebers (eg all teachers who teach him...) have the right priorities to keep him safe and to keep him well.

I was diagnosed as an adult and it took a while to get the hang of it. I use finger pricks to monitor my glucose levels.
At 13 he is young yet, but he does need to take more responsibility and unless he wants you showing up again needs to wear his Apple Watch if he won't use his phone, and do a prick test if the readings don't match his symptoms (or lack of). Eventually he will recognise the signs and get on it before he gets a proper hypo - I get to about 4 and feel a bit shaky, though have been below 2 quite a few times.
By the way I can't stand the glucose gel and the tablets (like Dextrose) aren't enough - I have to take several for any effect. Jam is actually quite good (a mini jar is transportable) and flat non Diet Coke or juice. But if he keeps waiting for the hypo to get very low he may also lose capacity to know what to do.
On a positive note I'm 20 years on, had another child after diagnosis and am pretty chill about it now. It does not stop me from doing anything (other than eating spontaneously)!

ALL the information you had indicated this was a genuine emergency... I would probably have called 999 en route to the school. Totally reasonable and - as a teacher - no one at my school would judge you for that. We have TAs doing direct checks on all our diabetic students throughout the day.

I would have done the same. Hopefully, it will make your son realise he needs to take it more seriously and turn the alarm on. If it was me I'd tell him I'd do it again if he didn't turn the alarm on his phone and send you a quick text to say he's ok after it has gone off.
Maybe the receptionist was a bit shocked and didn't realise you could keep tabs on your child's levels this way. I only knew about this monitor as my colleague's phone went off the other week. I've never heard of it. But still she was out of order.

Bit of an aside to this but all school staff should be at least basic first aid trained. How to use an epipen etc. Probably once a year. Please ask the school to include diabetes as part of this first aid training. If they don't agree, jump up and down. Also, see if your boy has a buddy who's prepared to help? I had a year 11 student who kept crashing (long story) but she had a good group of mates who knew exactly what to do.

Well said! People can be cruel for no reason

I suggest you write a letter to the head, explaining the situation and apologising if you were rude to staff as you appreciate they have a lot to deal with on a day to day basis. Emphasise how serious the condition is and wouldn’t want to put his staff in a position where they had to deal with a life-threatening situation. Also comment on how, as he/she knows only too well, teenagers are reluctant to draw attention to themselves and therefore your son might play the situation down, so you are reliant on his/her staff keeping working with you to keep him safe.
That way, you’re keeping them onside while reminding them of their responsibilities. Good luck with it all.

Definitely not OTT OP! A low like that is very dangerous & very scary as a parent if you're away from them.

YANBU I would have done the same thing.

Would have absolutely done the same thing, you can't mess around with diabetes and going into a coma! Ignore anyone who thinks you overreacted. I have a best friend whose Mum lives a way away and when she couldn't get the usual response form her or she sounded slurry she rang me and I went immediately. Mostly she had turned herself around but there were a couple of times I had to take charge otherwise she would've gone into a coma..xx

Your a mother!You did nothing wrong!

The poster telling the son to grow up has clearly never dealt with teenagers deciding they want to be like their mates and not wanting a chronic condition anymore.

You are in no way neurotic. You were terrified. The school secretary raising her eyebrows was disgusting. Imagine, God forbid , how she would feel if your son had been really poorly and there’s xx no point the other woman saying you are an anxious mum. We would all be anxious mum’s in that scenario because a deeply anxiety provoking thing had happened and I’m sure you would feel the same way if it were to happen in a few years time. It is the condition that is anxiety provoking. You did exactly the right thing and I hope all is well now.

YANBU my 34 year old brother died almost 2 years ago from severe hypoglycaemia. His blood sugars went dangerously low while he was asleep,he fell into a coma and died. People think because diabetes is common it isnt serious, not at all true.x

You did the right thing, but I do think the poor receptionist got the brunt of your stress….. an acknowledgment of your stress and possibly a box of chocolates would maybe smooth things over and build a few bridges! I would imagine the raised eyebrows were an attempt by the receptionist to process the situation, not make a judgement about your parenting.

Apologies for what exactly?! No way OP you did the right thing

No apologies or chocolates needed! You did absolutely the right thing .

You absolutely did the right thing. As the former 'medical lady' I have dealt with similar scenarios. I expect he has the CGM linked up to his own phone/ device to hand too so both he and the medical lady would have seen that it was reading so low. Did he do a finger prick test to double check the reading? If so I would (and she should) have called you to let you know the CGM was malfunctioning and that his blood sugar was absolutely fine. I would possibly check the training of their medical staff/ designated first aiders to ensure they're trained in type 1 diabetes and push for this if they're not, if there hasn't been a meeting with your DS's diabetes nurse and school then they're should have been and I would suggest something about what to do when they suspect the CGM is malfunctioning is added to his IHCP to make sure you're called in future.

The staff member on reception clearly has no idea about type 1 diabetes and what an emergency looks like in that scenario, but the medical lady doesn't sound too well versed in communicating with parents either especially with managing chronic conditions like this!

My husband has been Type 1 for 54 years and recently was prescribed a CGM (as advertised on TV) which took him a while to get used to but it's so much better than the finger pricks which he only did if he thought he might be going high or low. Does your son not qualify for a CGM? Well worth checking because although they are hellishly expensive Type 1 diabetics are by far the minority these days and have others have said it is a far more difficuly condition to live with than the self-inflicted Type 2 diabetes which was non-existent in the 70s when my husband was diagnosed (at the age of 13 like your son)
Good luck to him

No bloody way were you overreacting.

So sorry for to hear that@DeeDoyle. I came across reports about this when DS was still in hospital and it totally terrified me. I wanted to ask them to keep him in. Still does hence why I have never slept properly since. No idea how we’ll cope when DS leaves home. It truly is a cruel disease. You can work so hard to manage it and still something like that can happen. So sorry for the loss of your brother xx

I would have done the same but kicked the door down 😂😂 don’t doubt yourself

You’re not being unreasonable. And I don’t think you should care what the school thinks. Your child comes first

You need to find your own "real" from experience. What do you trust in terms of monitor warnings? Do you trust your son? What do you need in terms of reassurance from the school? They just have to manage your expectations. Your son will become an independent adult. Your main concern is working with the school to make sure he has the skillset to manage his condition without you or the school.

I would have done the same, including putting receptionist in her place!