To think this isn't right

[Idk0]

If you were at a playgroup, and a mother kept getting physical with a child that wasn't hers, what would you do?

The mother in question keeps going up to a particular toddler and snatching toys off the child to give to her own child. More recently she seems to take toys off the child that her own child doesn't even want. She prises the child's hand open and it makes the child cry and writhe to get away from her. It looks painful. She's not hitting or shouting at the kid, but this behaviour makes me really uncomfortable. What would you do if this was your child, or a child you knew?

Where is the child’s parent/ carer?

I’d tell her to get the fuck off my child

I’d stop her. Where’s the parent? If it’s you you sit or stand by your child and tell her firmly to stop touching your child. I’d also complain to the group organiser.

My child?

"ERRRR. EXCUSE ME? TAKE YOUR HANDS OFF MY CHILD!!!"

Someone elses child?

"I don't think we should be touching other people's kids, do you?"

And I'd expect the playgroup leaders to ask her to leave

The lady used to be nice to the child, and the child seemed to really like her, as her child and this child seem to be friends. Since this behaviour, the child doesn't really engage with her anymore, but it's like she wants to do this to the child, as she moves over to where this child is if the child is not nearby. The caregiver is next to the child, but just looks shocked and doesn't do anything. The lady hurting the child has a bit of a reputation for spreading gossip and being unkind to other parents by stealth.

I would be taking things back out of bully mothers hands to be honest.

If you don't feel you can speak to the child's parents I'd mention it to staff. Although really it's the parents choice

So the child's own parent does nothing? I would have a word with the leaders of the playgroup as this is bullying and quite frankly abusive behaviour. The parent may be timid or afraid but something needs to be done to stop this now!

Poor kid.

Why not raise it yourself when it happens?

I can’t bare parent so weak that they can’t find their voice when witnessing a child being hurt by someone else.

Id also be reporting the parents to social services, they can reach out to give help and advice as if they’re willingly allowing their child to be harmed in public id hate to see what they tolerate in private

It is absolutely bonkers to me that the child’s parent or carer doesn’t say something at the time but I guess the next best thing would be tp speak to the group organisers. I’d be pretty savage about it if someone hurt, bullied and snatched toys from my child.

Call her out on it. Ask why she’s doing it but also speak privately to the ‘caregiver’ (mum?) and ask if they are okay and do they need support with this.

If the parent was sitting there quietly watching I'd speak with the organise after the session and befriend the parent/carer next week, ask her to sit with you.

So this woman is targeting one particular child? If the parent cant/won't intervene, the playgroup leader needs to step in and tell her to cut it out or leave.
If my child was being abused like this the woman would be leaving in an ambulance

How strange. I would be concerned that the person caring for the child appears unable to advocate for her, which is very worrying in itself. I would certainly, at the very least be mentioning it to the play leader. Adults cannot just stand by, and do absolutely nothing. If that was my child, that behaviour would not have happened twice.

Well, the mum finally had enough and told the lady to leave her child alone. Cue the bully mum storming off crying. I don't know what will happen now, but I'm pleased someone did something.