Teacher arrested for attempted murder

[Bottomofthebarrel]

This week a teacher at my DD’s secondary school was arrested for attempted murder. He stabbed a woman in the head and neck in broad daylight, and I believe he was only unsuccessful in killing her because other people intervened. She is in a critical condition in hospital, so he could be looking at a murder charge. This has all been in the news, including the BBC.

This man was teaching my own child until very recently. She was given an after school detention by him for being very slightly late to his lesson, and the detention was just him and her sat in a room. That sends shivers down my spine now. I can’t get the whole thing out of my head.

This must be so disturbing for all the kids at the school. I feel that the school are potentially going to struggle more with behaviour control from now on - this man was employed as one of their role models so I can’t help but feel they’ve lost the moral high ground. Not to mention the effect on those who are in their exam years and are now minus a subject teacher.

How the fuck does someone like that become a teacher? I must say in the last 9 years since my DC started secondary, I’ve come across a few - all of them male - teachers who have got my back up and seem to be definite ‘power tripping know it all’ types, and not particularly bright to boot. There’s another male teacher in another local school who was in the news, having to pay £200,000 damages to his neighbour after a childish bullying campaign which went on for years.

Is this the best we can do? I get teaching isn’t the most attractive profession, but it actually terrifies me that these people are supposed to be guiding and leading our children, sometimes on a one to one basis. My worry is that with the current shortage of teachers, and desperation to fill vacancies, the standards are going to sink even lower.

This isn’t a general teacher bashing thread, there are many truly wonderful ones out there, and I know it’s an incredibly difficult job. Just feeling very shaken by what has happened this week. My DD really didn’t like this man and I assumed it was her being a stroppy teen, now I feel awful for not taking her seriously.

Op, you're processing. This thread probably might not be particularly helpful for that because people who haven't experienced something like this simply won't get it.

It's a huge shock. You left your child with someone who turned out to be dangerous, whether they were a direct threat or not to your child is beside the point - that is going to shake you up and that is 100% understandable. In your post I can tell you feel guilty and you're replaying events - all normal. Alot of different things over the next few weeks will come back to you, and it will for a while. You may want to talk about him, almost obsessively, for a while and you may try to make sense of it by aimlessly trying to figure out who to blame, or you turn inwards and try to work out what's wrong with you that you didn't sense he was wrong and should have prevented it. (You couldn't have but you may think like that).

It's all normal.

It's a shock. And it's unreasonable for anyone to have a reply of - oh well there's dangerous people in all professions - because while that's 100% true this one was far too close to home for you.

You think you live in a safe place in the world - logically you know the world can be a dangerous place - but emotionally you think your street, your school, your workplace etc are safe and sometimes something happens that makes you question everything. This is one of those things.

I have experienced something similar and it left me really not quite right for a while. Although I'm over it now.

Try and find some safe people to talk to, not people who roll their eyes like you're being silly. Finding out one of your kids teachers tried to murder someone is not a normal, every day occurrence. It's entirely normal that you'll be left feeling really wobbly about it all.

Talking to a therapist can help. Im not saying you need weeks of intense therapy but one or two sessions with a private therapist can just help you make sense of what's happened.

When it happened to me, I got lucky, I suppose. My DH was largely dismissive. He didn't understand what I was experiencing. But then the next day told a couple of co-workers down the pub, and one of them did, and it was then it dawned on him what I was going through. He came immediately home in a state, full of apologies that he'd been so dismissive the previous evening, because he didn't get why this would upset me. I spent the entire weekend obsessively talking about it, couldn't sleep, read everything in the news I could find. For a good few weeks I just couldn't stop thinking about it and I had a few panic attacks. But in time after I processed it, I came out the other side.

Massive hugs. This isn't a normal thing and to repeat, it's entirely normal and understandable that your mind will be all over the place.

You're right, I misread. Still doesn't change my view of OP's posts.

I think it’s normal to be shocked when someone in your community commits a heinous crime, but it drives me nuts when people make loose connections and decide it could have been them. It’s dramatic, self centered, can cause anxiety and is so disrespectful to those who’ve been involved. Imagine being that person who was the victim and hearing others bang on about how it could have been them.

I do agree with part of this, see the Nicola Bully threads but in these particular circumstances I understand why the OP was rattled & trying yo
process it.

Obviously we don't know the circumstances as yet but abusive and violent men don't commit these acts of violence because of mental health issues, they do it for power and control.

I hate the trope that this is because of MH issues, he may have comorbidity with some MH conditions but usually violent men are perfectly aware of what they are doing and do it anyway.

Ah and now the mental health card to excuse the savage attack of a woman. Wow.

Most of the country have mental health issues they don’t walk around stabbing women in the neck.

What an odd statement from the school.

"A domestic incident". You'd think he'd broken a plate or something.

Ah and now the mental health card to excuse the savage attack of a woman. Wow.

Its fucking weird

It’s bloody disturbing that there are teachers EXCUSING attempted murder.

It’s bloody disturbing that there are teachers EXCUSING attempted murder.

Im hoping they aren’t actual teachers & they are just being contrary because they are bored or whatever!

Minimising and down playing this horrendous incident. The kids won’t care, it’s fine, you are being that parent op. Must have mental health issues etc etc.

Its despicable.

Jesus Christ.

Nope I recognise some of them sadly. They are always on here.

For the shock, for sure. It’s understandable to be shocked and shaken up, but I don’t think it’s okay to start the ‘It could have been me’ stuff, especially when there are children around, or the ‘who shall we blame’ stuff - the one to blame is the man who committed this crime. He’s the only one to blame. The school and the teachers will be suffering, they don’t need parents publicly blaming them for his actions. The students, teachers, school and mostly the lady and her family need the support, not the gruesome stuff that always arises with these incidents.

So you think all the kids, including your impressionable daughter, are going to follow his example and start stabbing people. I like to think that 99.9% of adolescents just aren’t that stupid!

Don't be so goady. OP is the one who has made the murder attempt all about teachers in general and people are responding to her comments. Would you like everyone to add a line saying "thoughts and prayers to the victim" with a flower bouquet at the end of their comments?

Plus, the impact on the pupils should be minimal in that the attack didn't happen on school grounds, none of them witnessed it. Yes, they'll be shocked, but it's hardly going to cause life-long damage and make them mess up their exams.

Unfortunately there are bad people in all walks of life and no amount of screening is going to catch every single one. As others have said, teachers are just people and there will be good ones and the odd bad one. I'm sure the school will want to address what's happened with their students and offer any support needed to any students who are really disturbed or affected. I don't think the school has 'lost the moral high ground'.

You know teachers are just people . We just live lives like everyone else. We don't go back to a silk lined cubicle every night and think pure and uplifting thoughts until tomorrow.

How the hell do you know what the impact will be to the children? On pupils already struggling with anxiety and stress. It’s an horrendous situation, stop minimising!!

Really don’t get your point? It is a teacher bashing thread. What exactly do you suggest is done? Teachers are actual human beings despite the Mumsnet crowd feeling they are scum who should do as they are told. What this man has done is despicable. But unless they invent time travel to look into the future before hiring- what do you want? Is being a murderer in anywhere else in society ok? No. Why focus on the teacher part?

We expect a certain level of stability, safety and dignity - absolutely. Not unreasonably.

I don't think we should tar teachers with the attempted murder brush at all but somehow threads on here about the police can talk about institutionalised sexism/racism and that is fair game but when someone raises about whether we are vetting teachers properly or toxic behaviour from teachers in schools we aren't allowed to do that? Why?

I think there should be no more female nurses since the Lucy Letby case.

I think all DBS checks should be carried out by people who can predict the future.

This is effectively what some posters are saying and it's ridiculous.

A guy I was in uni with murdered his dad and a former client was jailed for manslaughter. While upsetting & disturbing, I didn't develop any similar murderous tenancies. This man's pupils are unlikely to too.

There's good & bad in every walk of life. You can't eliminate that. However, it is a tiny minority of people.

For the shock, for sure. It’s understandable to be shocked and shaken up, but I don’t think it’s okay to start the ‘It could have been me’ stuff, especially when there are children around, or the ‘who shall we blame’ stuff - the one to blame is the man who committed this crime.

The students, teachers, school and mostly the lady and her family need the support, not the gruesome stuff that always arises with these incidents.

The OP didn’t imply she was in danger, she said the fact her dd who was a student had a detention alone with him & gave her shivers which I think is understandable.
People like to think they can judge characters & see red flags etc it’s comforting when in reality there often aren’t any. And blame is human nature, of course the man who committed the crime is to blame but I would think it was odd to not question if all the correct employment checks etc were carried out. After all parents lose trust in schools for a lot less than have an attempted murderer as a teacher.

This post borders on being disrespectful to be honest.

Of course we have female nurses but we’ve also changed things at a procedural level to try to prevent these sorts of crimes taking place.

I am wondering if anyone else remembers Ian Huntley and Soham. Very easy to be flippant when it isn’t your child in the same room as a violent, unpredictable man, isn’t it?