Partner going on abrubt week ling work trip.

[Dylon]

Hello, I am new to this, i didnt want to use reddit because those people are crazy. I'll try to keep this short, but basically my partner last week said that they have a photoshoot to go to for work, they bei g the graphoc designer, is going to california for a week with the photographers. I cant help but feel u easy about this, as this has never happened before, and that seems like a long photoshoot. I dont know how to bring this up without sounding unreasonable. Things to be aware of is, they get very upset if i so much as work late, but doesnt seem to get why i dont love that they are leaving for an entire week. Is being very vague about it all, and generally does not like me doing things without them. But when the shoe is on the other foot, i just need to be okay with it, and be happy about it. Its partly that theyre leaving, but mostly the principal that if it were me, it would not be kindly accepted. Am i being unreasonable with my feelings about this? Should i just stay out of their business?

Do you and 'they' have kids together?

in addition to the kids question, do you live together? Do you share finances? Have you met this persons cousins?

I think you need to concentrate on how they react when you have/want to do things without them

It’s not so much the going away but that ‘the partner’ would object to you doing the same.
Are you happy in the relationship @Dylon ?

It depends on where you are living ?

California is a long way from the UK so a week for a photo shoot is nothing.

but there is more to this than meets the eye, isn't there.

I had an international job for years, before I had ds, and a week away in the US was completely normal, just part of my life.

But I didn't object to my partner travelling for his work. That would have been completely unreasonable. Everyone has a career and if travelling is part of it, you have to accept it or find someone else. Have you asked her why she objects? Is there a backstory of you doing daft stuff while travelling in the past?

I had one very short term boyfriend who tried to insist I leave my job or that he travel with me, which was obviously not going to work so we went our separate ways.

In my role I travelled a lot until a couple of years ago. One trip was to Singapore with three days notice. My wife was not in the slightest put out, as as soon as I knew she knew. But if the shoe had been on the other foot I wouldn't have ha Dany problem.

@Dylon your other half is a selfish twat. And a fucking hypocrite.

How come this is good enough for them but not for you? Moaning if you so much as work late, FFS.

DH and I always used to travel a lot for work. He once had a two week trip to the USA with very short notice and that was because somebody else resigned. These things do happen. I wouldn’t be so bothered about the trip itself, but the way he reacts when you have to do anything is not on. Neither of you seem to have much trust.

Well his or her attitude to you is not ok, but that doesnt mean you match it and go worse.