Pushy parent or neglectful nursery?

[MadnessMummy]

Help a FTM… is this normal?

LO started nursery two weeks ago. He’s 9 1/2 months.

On several occasions LOs came home with a soiled nappy.

Today, as usual, LO was there for 9 1/2 hours. They offered LO one bottle. In this time LO normally has 3. LO did eat their breakfast and dinner. However, LO normally eats this and drinks three bottles. I wouldn’t have an issue if LO only drank one bottle and left the others my issue is LO wasn’t offered.

I’ve asked nursery to not let any nap exceed 2hours. Today instead of two naps LO had one sleep for 3hours.

When I collected, LO was exhausted as they had been awake since 1 so LO fell asleep before we even got home which made tea time and bedtime a nightmare!

When we got home LO drained their bottle and cried for more, something LO never done (cried for more)

Is this normal? Is this what I am to expect from a nursery? As there are so many children to care for?

I wouldn't be happy with that

At my sons nursery we give them a breakdown of the normal routine and they try to stick to it as much as possible (they do have a disclaimer saying it might not always be completely possible in terms of exact nap times, etc as it partially depends on others children, etc). Our nursery have said they aren’t allowed to wake the children up from naps,
I can’t remember why, they’ll try to make extra noise, etc to wake them but they can’t physically wake them up.

I think not acceptable and you're not being pushy.
Baby shouldn't be sent home in soiled nappy - that's not ok. Of course a one off but for this to have happened multiple times in just 2 weeks isn't ok.
Regarding the milk - baby's still very young and they should absolutely be listening to your requests on how much to feed them (or at least offer).
Sorry you must be feeling crappy about it.
The nap one is tricky as they have multiple children to deal with but one nap for a 9.5 month old is normally not enough.
Follow your gut and if you're not happy, move them x

Are you sending milk? Usually under one they expect you to provide.

That is not considered good practice for children this young

I'm usually quick to defend childcare settings but I wouldn't be happy about this at all.

They should be offering milk feeds as close to normal routine as possible.

Being sent home in a dirty nappy should only be a rare occasion, you'd expect them to be close enough to smell a lot of the time! I only worked in a baby room briefly but we also checked nappies before handing over - we routinely did them morning and afternoon and then just before the end of the day for those that did full hours, but would still check at home time to make sure!

Naps.. I did work in one setting that had a policy of allowing children to sleep as long as they needed up to 3pm (if I remember right), so would not wake them sooner. That would be a conversation to have with the manager - is it policy or is their life just easier when baby is sleeping?!

I think it’s little one. Annoying his many times it appears in one post !

To answer some question and clear things up. 😊

Yes, I send milk in.

He still needs/wants the bottles he was hysterical when he got home last night. He has slept through the night since 3 1/2 months (yes I know I’m very, very lucky) last night he woke up hysterically crying for a bottle and drained it) he’s never done that!

He still needs the second nap. He fell asleep in the car in less than ten second’s because he was so exhausted.

When looking around nurseries this nursery told us, without us asking, they’ll stick to nap times and feeds. I myself am not religious at sticking to times. He might have a bottle at 9 or 10.30 but it’s around that time and he’s offered it and always takes it.

Nursery, work with lots of children and I would believe they are qualified to make the best judgment to care for my child when I’m not there. I don’t believe I should micro manage but from his behaviour when he got home? he clearly needed another sleep and more milk. So I can’t understand their rationale. When I went to pick him up he’d been awake 4 hours. He was absolutely exhausted and starving.

That's awful. I'd complain to the manager and even considering switching to a different nursery.

Poor baby. Definitely speak to the manager.