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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Driven to distraction

7 replies

Cantseethewoodforthetrees44 · 29/02/2024 14:55

I've changed my username for this post & it describes the way I'm feeling. I should be grateful for my life, no real health issues or money worries etc. The problem is DH & I are self employed & we both work from home in 2 seperate 'office' rooms. I have good days & bad days. DH is an absolute trouper but to be honest a lot of people would describe him as a workaholic. He loves it but for me its just a job with up times & down times. Today I feel like screaming & pacing the floor just listening to him on the phone. I can hear him now sounding so motivated & happy & here I am feeling like tearing my hair out. We do have breaks & nights out but it still feels like work work work. Our children are at uni so no stresses there. I have one son who does call me a lot for support if hes struggling with his studies. I have a sister too who is always looking for advice about one problem or another. I've always been looked upon as the agony aunt in my extended family. That shouldn't add to my anxiety but it does. I also feel guilty for not generally working as hard as DH in day to day business but I take care of most of the household tasks although he does his share too. All in all I have a wonderful DH who I really love, a good home & should have nothing to complain about. I'm constantly anxious these days & today everything is literally driving me to distraction. DH just walked into my room & asked if I was. ok. He could tell by my expression there's something wrong. I had to breathe deeply so I wouldn't scream or punch the wall. He doesn't deserve that. This doesn't happen every day but it builds up & today is one of my bad days. Can anyone relate or AIBU.

OP posts:
idontlikealdi · 29/02/2024 14:58

Why are you feeling like tearing your hair out, because of your work or because he's annoying you?

How old are you? Peri?

Ofcourseshecan · 29/02/2024 15:08

With university-age DC, could it be perimenopause? Or do you just need a proper break from work (and being agony aunt)? It’s easy to work nonstop when you’re self-employed. Be a better employer to yourself! Take regular time off, and enjoy it with DH if possible.

Deafening · 29/02/2024 15:37

I came to ask about perimenopause. When mine hit I was a mess for quite a while.

Cantseethewoodforthetrees44 · 29/02/2024 15:57

I should actually be through the menopause but yes I still feel hormonal, worse at times than others. It's amazing how sharing this here has made me feel more relaxed. I suppose I should count my blessings. Thanks for the replies.

OP posts:
weekfour · 29/02/2024 17:07

Just because a few people have replied doesn't make the way you feel silly. You're allowed to say you feel pissed off.
I recognise myself here. I'm too the agony aunt. It makes you feel like others have it worse so you shouldn't struggle.

What do you enjoy? Can you spend some time doing exactly what you want?

Geebray · 29/02/2024 17:09

Maybe a change of scenery would help you. WFH doesn't suit everyone. Could you do shared work space? Or even a cafe for a couple of hours?

sunlovingcriminal · 29/02/2024 17:11

Do you think being self-employed that you are missing "something" that perhaps people working in other environments might have for at least some element of change and variety?

Could you work somewhere else a couple of days a week for the change of scenery?

Could you join some professional networking groups to give you some variety? Maybe a walking one to get you out of the house?

It sounds like you're stuck in a rut and getting stir crazy?

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