Laughed at this morning

[Evieee19]

As I went to put my LO in the car this morning there was a van parked behind me, they were parked close so made it harder for me to get out. As I approached my car it looked as if they were talking about me and laughing, smirking amongst themselves and it made me feel really uncomfortable. I could just feel their eyes on me and laughing. I’m just sure what at exactly but I could just tell they were

My self confidence is at all time low due to getting out of an abusive relationship and I just feel even more bad about myself

I seem to take everything to heart and I am a lot more sensitive now but I just feel like I’m a laughing stock

How can I stop caring what people think?

These men are not worth a nanosecond of your time. And what strangers think of you doesn’t matter. Well done on getting out of your abusive relationship, you should be proud of yourself.

When i gave up caring what others thought i started to live.
Now i couldnt give a hoot if people stare laugh judge talk they can carry on.
I really dont care about it.

Just feel sorry for the men.

They must have such miserable lives if all they can do is laugh at someone.

I’d imagine they are dickheads laughing at the fact they have made it difficult for someone (anyone) to get their car out. It wasn’t aimed at you in particular, just pathetic bored men, proud that they have made someone’s day a little harder.

Well done on leaving your relationship, that was brave.

Please don't think it is anything to do with you. It's everything to do with the puerile, pathetic inadequacy of some men who feel that they can behave this way towards women.

They never do it when they're on their own, they always need a 'mate'.

I don't know what can be done about it, I've had this myself when I've been getting in or out of the car or just walking, minding my own business. It's them, not me and not you. There's something wrong with them and any woman is a target for their irrelevance.

Ignore them at the time that it happens and don't give them any space in your head afterwards.

I doubt they were laughing at you. You can't "just know". It's your low confidence is making you think this. If your confidence was higher you wouldn't think this.

Ignore when you think this happens.

You are making assumptions about what they were talking about and laughing about. They were probably just chatting and laughing and it had nothing to do with you. You are feeling low and vulnerable and are projecting.

I would have asked them very politely to reverse a bit so I could get out. Often when you engage with people (not always admittedly) you'll find they're ok, and it can help to increase your confidence. If they are nice about it, you will feel good, and if they're not, you can have satisfaction in knowing that they're wankers!

Come off it, the OP isn't stupid and to put this down to her self esteem when she's already acknowledged that it's low, is just dismissive for the sake of it.

Women are heckled, laughed and jeered at. All day, every day. Not the same women and not all men but it doesn't happen the other way around, does it?

On balance of probability, what happed is what the OP says happened and I'll go by that.

I am 99% sure they were not laughing at you.

It always baffles me on posts like this the instant jump to attack men

This . You can't just tell.

Someone once got very upset with me and two of my friends because they 'just knew' we were laughing at her.

We weren't laughing at her at all. I hadn't even registered her presence, in fact. . We were just laughing about something completely different and my friend just glanced in her direction, just sort of looking around the cafe we were in.

So I wouldn't convince yourself that people are laughing at you.

They may not have been laughing at you, could’ve been anything; but they might have been as you suspect. Either way you are only concerned about it because of how you feel about yourself at present.

Your feelings of low self worth caused by your recent abusive relationship can take ages to overcome - after all it took time for your ex-partner to erode your self esteem so it will take time to rebuild it. Make a point of taking time to think consciously every day about all you have done to escape such a difficult situation to provide a better life for you and your child. Congratulate yourself on the mental strength it took to get out and the practical skills you used to succeed in that aim. Think about all of the small steps you are taking every day to improve your life and how capable that makes you.

If your ex-partner derided your appearance (common manipulation tactic used by wankers) focus every day on something you like about yourself appearance wise - doesn’t matter what it is, could be hair, ankles or gorgeous earlobes(!) and try to find different things all the time. Then dress/groom/accessorise to flatter whatever it is and make YOU feel better about yourself that day. Gradually you will feel better about yourself and get to realise your own value, caring less about the opinions of others.

Finally, most people are pretty nice. They are usually too wrapped up in their own issues to be giving strangers any more than a passing thought. I can assure you self consciousness dissipates with age, as someone 50+ I truly could not care less of strangers’ opinions.