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AIBU?

Hygiene; Single v family

26 replies

Jeannie88 · 28/02/2024 00:32

Just wondering really, no judgement, just observation. I find my friends who live alone compared to those who don't all live a much more slovenly lifestyle. Meaning piles of unwashed dishes, thick dust, bathroom could do with a clean etc. Though conversions also, oh I couldn't be bothered to shower at the weekend, need to do a wash now I don't have any clean underwear and some have actually ordered new pants on amazon because they still cba!

So aibu to think wow life really is so much easier on your own in many ways, just having to look after yourself.

Or aibu that this really isn't good and too easy to slip back into being a teenager?

Pros and cons of course, personally of DH away I won't clean up as much every as no one to answer to.Self pride yes but it slips a bit. X

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Aussieland · 28/02/2024 00:36

Wtf. No weirdly as a single person I was perfectly capable of keeping my house clean, clothes washed, healthy meals cooked and body showered.
Yes it’s easier than when you have kids of course but you don’t suddenly become some manky troll when you are single. Jesus

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Aquamarine1029 · 28/02/2024 00:38

I find my friends who live alone compared to those who don't all live a much more slovenly lifestyle. Meaning piles of unwashed dishes, thick dust, bathroom could do with a clean etc. Though conversions also, oh I couldn't be bothered to shower at the weekend, need to do a wash now I don't have any clean underwear and some have actually ordered new pants on amazon because they still cba!

That is really, really grim. I don't think I could be what I consider to be a friend with a person like this. You're friends with several people like this? For an able-bodied person, unless serious mental health issues are involved, there's no excuse for living like this.

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ComtesseDeSpair · 28/02/2024 00:41

I suspect your weird friends are single because they are filthy, not the other way around.

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FiveShelties · 28/02/2024 00:43

What strange friends you have.

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Back21970 · 28/02/2024 00:48

I tend to agree, there’s less urgency and maybe less incentive to clean up when it’s only you at home.

Would rather not be like that but do find myself slipping into bad habits since becoming single.

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Blackcats7 · 28/02/2024 00:58

I am single but my house is always spotless because that is how I like it.
I have married friends whose homes are a mess and some whose homes are immaculate.
It is down to personal preference and standards not whether you live alone.
What a bizarre post OP.

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Fleetwoodmac23 · 28/02/2024 01:01

🤣🤣🤣🤣.
i think it’s vice versa perhaps you can’t see through the waves of toys and your husbands shit everywhere

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Babla · 28/02/2024 01:08

Judgy post

Do not judge all single people who live alone by the same standards as the people you know!

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ouch321 · 28/02/2024 01:58

In the past few days on threads on here, I've read of a husband who kept weeing and getting it all over the floor and leaving it for his wife to clean up and another who was fed up and split from her OH with one of the reasons being that he kept leaving poo stains on the bed sheets from not wiping properly.

So what does that tell you...

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EmpressaurusOfTheScathingTinsel · 28/02/2024 02:56

YABU and generalising on the basis of a few people.

As far as I’m concerned one of the bonuses of having my flat to myself is that I only have to clean & tidy up after the cats & me, & none of us make that much mess.

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Rosindub · 28/02/2024 03:10

I've found the opposite. People with kids use it an excuse as "the kids will just mess it up again." So no point cleaning or tidying.

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Meadowfinch · 28/02/2024 03:37

My house is definitely cleaner since I had dcs.

I think that says I care for my ds more than I do myself. Also that I am home more often.

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Lurkingandlearning · 28/02/2024 04:25

The thing I found most grim about your post is that you do more cleaning when your husband is around because you have him “to answer to”.

Surely when he is there you would do less cleaning because he would be doing 50% of what is needed to maintain your home to your shared standards.

Do you think you have things closer to home to think about rather than your friends hygiene?

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Rolosaregreat · 28/02/2024 10:51

Are they single parents? I’m a single parent and I had a friend visiting comment once that I was lucky I could live how I wanted to and have a messy kitchen (we had lots of washing up stacked up after a busy week)…. And I didn’t know how to tell her how much of an incredible effort it had been that week to stay vaguely on top of things and limit the life chaos to a messy kitchen!!!!
things are easier now but not when the kids were little
if single without kids - no idea :)

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GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 28/02/2024 12:52

Of course you can’t generalise in this way! Of course some people will be like this but it’s not a trend I’ve ever seen or would expect to be the case. If anything I’d expect the other way around.

Also, why would you tell anyone this if true?

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SoRainbowRhythms · 28/02/2024 12:53

Strange assumption. My house stays cleaner for longer because I live alone.

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TheCompactPussycat · 28/02/2024 12:58

Oh look! Another thread about whether people shower often enough. That's at least the third in as many days. It's becoming an obsession!

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Jeannie88 · 04/03/2024 16:59

Huge apologies, my wording wasn't the best and I didn't think it had actually posted as my last new thread didn't work!

I had a few days off work, DC at school, so made a real effort to catch up with some friends I don't see very often. It was 3 different ones, they are single and when I went round they all had the same sort of 'mañana' attitude to piled up clothes, cleaning, washing up etc. Think I felt a bit envious they could just leave things, not be frantically every evening trying to keep on top of it all. Their mess is just their mess! I think I was struggling mentally, fed up, exhausted and in need of some downtime, which I rarely get.

Sorry, I really didn't mean to sound judgemental at all, I am my own worst enemy. Have had a reality check, got to do what you can and not beat yourself up for not being able to balance and juggle everything every day.

Lots of background to why I was feeling like this, the past couple of years of one thing after another. I shouldn't have posted such a stupid thread, feeling down after a few wines, lesson learnt! Xx

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Jeannie88 · 04/03/2024 17:03

TheCompactPussycat · 28/02/2024 12:58

Oh look! Another thread about whether people shower often enough. That's at least the third in as many days. It's becoming an obsession!

I'm all for not showering every day, unless particularly hot and sweaty! Every other day fine, same with washing hair, 2 or 3 times a week. Oh those nights of not having to bother are bliss lol 😆 xxx

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HauntedBungalow · 04/03/2024 17:11

Are your friends living in house shares? Ime they can become a bit grubby round the edges (the houses, that is) because there isn't that same sense of 'home' and some areas aren't 'owned' by any particular person.

Other than that, one person can only do half of what two people can do, and is less likely to have a complete skillset for everything that needs doing in a home. It's harder logistically and financially to be single than in a couple. Weird that you would think it's easier - it definitely isn't! Eg you can let things go for a few days if unwell but after that there's no one else there to sort your shit out that's built up and you have to get on with it. It's hard.

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Isitisit · 04/03/2024 17:14

I’m cleaner when living alone or when my husband goes away. It’s nice knowing that I can clean the house and it won’t get messed up in 5 minute’s by someone else. I feel less incentivised when someone else is in my space.

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PawsisShady · 04/03/2024 17:37

Aussieland · 28/02/2024 00:36

Wtf. No weirdly as a single person I was perfectly capable of keeping my house clean, clothes washed, healthy meals cooked and body showered.
Yes it’s easier than when you have kids of course but you don’t suddenly become some manky troll when you are single. Jesus

That! I get nothing but comments on how lovely my home is, how nice it smells, even my picky dad said (exact words) "I'll say this you keep the place nice" HmmGrin

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Treehuggingmutherfunkin · 04/03/2024 17:46

No people with families are way dirtier I wouldn't eat at some peoples homes that have several kids

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Treehuggingmutherfunkin · 04/03/2024 17:46

Single people have more time to clean themselves and their homes. This thread is absolute nonsense and you know it

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PawsisShady · 04/03/2024 17:49

Here's part of my home currently. It looks like this most days, kitchen gets messy when I batch cook but it's all tidy within a few hours

Hygiene; Single v family
Hygiene; Single v family
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