To ask the CMS for a review even though I already receive a lot of money from ex?

[PilgorTheGoat]

I receive £1,200 pcm in child maintenance. I appreciate this is a lot of money. Ex doesn’t contribute anything else. I pay for all clubs, hobbies, etc. I provide a bag of clothes for when the children stay with him.

This amount was agreed 3 years ago. It was the amount recommended by the CMS calculator at the time. My ex has earned a substantial promotion since then.

I am scared to speak to him about money. He was abusive towards me throughout the majority of our marriage.

AIBU to ask him to review the amount he pays in maintenance? I honestly don’t know either way.

How many children do you have? I don't think mine have ever cost that much outside of paid childcare.

In my very recent experience the CMS would sort this out for you quick sharp and if he didn't agree they would do a deduction of earnings.

1200 is a lot is there a reason you want more? (Other than it being fair).

Is he self employed or anything like that where he could hide earnings/declare earning 0 which would jeopardise the 1200?

Of course you should do it, if you can't ask him directly.

Just because some women get less, that doesn't mean you shouldn't get what you're entitled to.

I don't think mine have ever cost that much outside of paid childcare.

Thats not the point though is it?
He obviously earns a huge amount. The children should be able to have a good standard of living and not miss out.

do you know his salary? CMS only takes into account up to about £155-160K or something so it could be that he’s already over that and his pay rise won’t make any difference to the amount

Wow and I get £6.72 a week 😂

This amount was agreed 3 years ago. It was the amount recommended by the CMS calculator at the time. My ex has earned a substantial promotion since then.

Do you know how much he's earning now - or thereabouts? Have you plugged it into a calculator to see the prediction of how much you think you should be getting now?

My ma got diddley squat for me. Doesn't mean that someone who's earning £££ shouldn't pay a proportionate amount for their kids.

Not unreasonable at all and it's the children's entitlement so you'll be doing it for them. It doesn't matter if you're already receiving what some might consider a good amount. The children have a legal right to receive financial support commensurate with the absent parent's ability to pay.

Yanbu. And I say that as someone who hasn't had a penny in CM for nearly 11 years.

The max anyone “has” to pay is £1454 irrelevant of whether they earn millions

I don’t know what he is earning now only that he has had a substantial promotion.

I don’t need more money from him but if nothing else I could save the additional amount for DC in the future.

We have 3 DC and he was earning just over £100k when we divorced. The children see him every other weekend.

Really?? That's shocking.

Well, in view of the above, I would think carefully about whether you potentially want to stir up a hornet's nest over £254 pm, @PilgorTheGoat . Especially if he has form for being abusive.

Well it’s actually £1575 if the dad never has them overnight but £1454 is based on the dad having them 1-2 nights on average per week

I was not aware of that upper limit. Thank you for sharing

under CMS there may be an upper limit, but it’s simply not true that the highest possible child maintenance amount is £1.5k. A application through Section 1 of the children’s act is required for higher amounts so there is likely to be material legal fees (which in limited circumstance may be paid by the maintenance payer). If you aren’t doing this amicably, then he would probably need to earn well above £150k and with material assets, and/or the children are very young and there are many years of maintenance required for the legal fees and the emotional cost to be worth it.

maybe speak to a family solicitor who specialises in higher net worth clients to see what the costs and potential increase in payments are.

Is he self employed? Because I wouldn’t risk it, you could ask with hopes of more and end up with less and he could get away with it. My ex is self employed and on child maintenance’s end, they claim he has no income and no benefits and doesn’t have to pay - all because he files his tax return to show as minus income each year. He pays me outside of CMS £160 a month even though he earns a decent wage. I’m not saying what you get is a lot, because in terms of raising three children and childcare, it barely covers anything - but in terms of ‘the system’, it is and it could backfire!

He is employed by a large, international company. He could still up his pension contributions in order to decrease his income though so I’d need to consider that too.

How old are the children? For instance if you have triplets who turn 18 and are leaving education this year probably best not to rock the boat

As he's abusive I'd weigh it up carefully. Would he be likely to want to have the children more to reduce his payments?

Also are you working because you may get the argument of he's contributing X amount so your supposed to 'match' that amount too

And?

OP you should get what your kids are due

Maintenance should be in proportion to his income, doesn't matter whether you "need" it or not so YANBU. However if he has form for being an arsehole would you want to risk it.

And before all the "you're so lucky I get nothing" comments start, don't bother, just because your kids father is a shit bag doesn't mean everyone else should just roll over and accept it too.

That’s not accurate at all. CMS isn’t a half contribution. It’s purely a percentage of the NRPs income. It’s irrelevant if the Op is contributing the same, much less or much more. There’s no 50/50 split expected

@YetMoreNewBeginnings

I meant she may get that argument from HIM not CMS