To moan about DH, and ask if anyone else’s partner is the same!

[Myhavethatone]

DH has been moaning about mess, to be fair so have I. But every time I try to clear it he starts stopping me.

’but don’t you want to keep that in case …’
’won’t ds like that when …’
’why don’t you just put that in the …’

basically he won’t let me throw anything away, take it to the charity shop or whatever. I do but I have to wait until he’s not around. It’s really frustrating. We have very limited storage space as it is.

Yes. My husband always questions whether we could reuse something rather than chuck it, but calls me a header (I'm really not)

Yep. My husband is more likely t hang on to things than me, I am always trying to reduce cluttter, but he wants to keep just in case.

DH is a bit like this as it may be useful

He is a lot better since he did some DIY at his Mums and realised just how much stuff she has.

We contemplated moving a few years ago from a 3 bed to a 4 bed but I pointed out stuff used up space so it was therefore money per square foot and you are paying cash to keep crap. That did help as he doesn’t like wasting money.

Get him to watch that Stacey Solomon show called sort your life out.

Oh god yes. So much stuff. 😬

My exH was, and tbh so was I when I was with him. Now I am very tidy and really good at throwing things away!

I'm a bit more like your DH and I know how much of a wind up it can be. However I think my DP is too far on the other end of the spectrum - I agree with less clutter and getting rid of useless items, obviously. But he does not see the sentimental value in (anyone else's) things and that can be a bit upsetting at times.

So I don’t know if this is a serious suggestion but would anyone’s DH actually honestly be amenable to this 😂😂

I have married a man who is very similar to my dad in that he hates to throw anything away either because it might come in handy or has sentimental value. My parents have two spare bedrooms and one of these is my dad's snug which is full of the stuff that he won't throw out. I dream that one day we can afford a bigger house so that my husband can have his own snug!

My DH is the same. He was recently diagnosed with ADHD and has been having coaching sessions. Apparently it is a common trait- he tends to get quite emotionally attached to objects and is also very creative so can always think of a way to repurpose something even if he never has time to do it. He has an entire garage full to the brim with all kinds of everything that he won’t throw away- I can’t even set foot in there.

It can be frustrating and I feel like I’m constantly battling against a rising tide of random items all over the house. It is a constant source of friction in our relationship. I don’t know what the answer is but you have my sympathy op!

Has he got a shed? Or part of the garage?
I wouldn’t mind but mine used to want to keep all sorts of shite, then couldn’t find anything that would actually be any use.

Yes! You should see our 'garage' aka Steptoe and Son's yard. If he wants to keep it, it gets relegated to the big-doored junk hole.
I'm personally ready for a 'death clean', although hoping death isn't coming just yet 😬

My dh was bad at throwing things out but also really good at reusing stuff, also he didn't buy much and only bought good quality, and he looked after his stuff.

I'm really clunsy and careless wuth things so they break, and I just become unable to sort or make decisions if I'm stressed or feeling a bit lazy

I know which is more functional.

Think about who is bringing more stuff into the house. Imo that is the major issue. If your dh is a car boot, ebay, 'it was a bargain' type or someone who shops for a hobby, then that's a problem and it's probably more important to tackle that.

yes we both watch

All your doing by hoarding stuff is making it someone else's problem when you die.

It's selfish and wasteful.

Keep as little as possible, enjoy what you do have and live your life.

Mr Monkey doesn't really have emotional attachment to stuff, he is just really crap at throwing things out or storing stuff properly. It is infuriating.

Yesterday I found two sturdy brown paper envelopes neatly folded on top of a box of new shoes on the floor of the spare room. He decided they would be good to keep for when we next need to send a parcel. Which they are. We have a full height double built in cupboard in the hall way that has a pull out tray where envelopes, boxes and present bags are stored. 🙄

Im a minimalist it would drive me mad to live with someone thats becoming a hoarder.
Im brutal i dont have what im not using.

I once had an ex that was a clutter bug i couldent cope with it.
Always the same i might need that im using that might come in handy ffs bin the crap im talking boxs of crap.
After a 2 year i was done with more and more crap coming in i told him sort it out or get out.
Im single best thing ever.
It took me two bloody days to clear all what he left It all went to the tip.
2 boxs of old broken phones/ cords/ wires even a box of scrap paper.
3 black bags of t-shirts 4 bags of jumpers god knows how many coats.
A very large box of over 40 cups and glasses.
That was just the side of the bedroom.
Even a large 4foot bird cage didnt have a bird.
The cheek of it was he wanted me to look after it i said take it or it goes to the tip.
6 year on i still think how can one want so much clutter.

Mines the same it is MADDENING.