Overweight Daughter doing dance- any dance teachers on here?

[Bibblybumblebee]

My daughter is 9. She is very tall and also overweight.
She comes from big stock (me and husband are not petite)
We try to keep her active and we are all working as a family to eat healthier.

She has discovered a dance group- majorettes - baton/pom poms.

The girls in her group are all small and she does stick out a bit. The costumes are all like sparkly leotards.

No one has been unkind and she really enjoys it!

Are there any dance teachers on here? Is it ok for bigger girls to do dance?
Does it affect anything? Groups not doing as well in competitions?

Please no one come at me- I love my daughter and want to protect her- I feel like putting her in the dance world may open her up to bullying.

She is 9 and wears age 12-13 clothes (mainly for length but also for her tummy)

I don’t see why not, if she enjoys it and nobody in the group has treated her badly?

My DD goes to a cheerleading troop and they also wear tight sequinned leotards. Whilst my dd is quite petite, there’s a few larger girls in the troop and I don’t think anyone bats an eyelid and everyone works together really well and are all very supportive.
I think you should encourage if she has found something she enjoys doing.

Dance life on Prime is good watching for her, as the girl who does best at the end of term is also the one that’s slightly larger / heavier set than the others :)

Also? If she’s still just nine and is doing an active hobby, her fitness level and weight might right itself anyway, especially given she’s still going to grow height wise.

Lizzo did a reality show about recruiting for her big girls dance troupe. Not the deepest show, but good for body positivity and raising profile of bigger dancers.

It’s great for her to be active, no matter her size.

I used to dance when I was younger and was overweight as a child. I never had any issues with it at your daughters age. All I will say is that if she has any aspirations to dance professionally, then her size will become an issue as it did with me. But just for Saturday morning classes, she will be fine.

If the group suffered in a competition because of her size, I would be questioning the competition organisers/judges, not your daughter. She should continue if she enjoys it.

My DD was in majorettes for years and at competitions you’d see girls of all shapes and sizes. The league they competed in did seem to be really supportive tbf. More about the teamwork, enjoying all the rhinestones and the dances than being uber gymnastic bunnies.

It’s fantastic that she is enjoying a healthy and active hobby.
Keep up the diet and exercise, no junk food and the weight will fall off her.

My daughter is in a dance group at school. It's only 6 girls who perform. They have danced and performed since kinder *US and now are in 8th grade so teens. The best dancer is a very large girl. I have never heard of her bullied and by far she is the most talented. I know it's so scary to feel you are offering up your child to bullying but if she enjoys it give her a chance. Sending you a hug because it's so clear you only want the best for her

If she can do the dance to competition standard why would it affect the competition

Good for her! Girls can become self conscious when they're older, regardless of size, so let her enjoy this innocent, fun time

Ah this could be my DD too. She had the same shape as me at that age. Both of our tummies went in a lot just before puberty. Regardless though, let your DD enjoy it and don't worry about her weight going against her. She's so young. Classes and groups at that age are to have fun and be active. If so much as one nasty person thinks otherwise, wipe the floor with them!

I think you should encourage her in the dance class - its great that she has found something she enjoys, and which can help her develop confidence, coordination, and team skills. As long as she enjoys it and is in a supportive environment with the other girls its very positive for her future fitness and development.

Your daughter is just on the cusp of puberty with all the physical changes, growing self conciousness and social pressure - many girls give up exercising/performing/dancing at this age - the more you can encourage her to continue hobbies and exercise during this stage, the better.

I was this kid - I did ballet, tap, jazz, lyrical etc and loved it. I honestly never had any bad comments about my size, I was a good dancer and treated like anyone else (although because I was tall I had to do the “boy parts” a lot but I found it quite funny tbh)

funnily when I hit puberty at 12/13 I suddenly lost a lot of weight and went on to be a professional dancer/dance teacher. I can honestly say at that age I was treated no different but I don’t know if I could say the same if I had maintained that shape as I was a teenager.

you sound like a lovely mum and I hope your daughter lives her best dancing life xxx

I will also say that out of everyone, my friends from dance classes are the ones I still talk to and spend time with many years later. Much more than school friends etc… you might be setting your daughter up with friends for life!

Good for her, keep her going. Everyone can dance if they want to.

My SGD is 11 and is a bigger girl. She cheerleads. Fitted costume but heavy fabric. Full makeup and bows. She is primarily a “ base” and helps lift the other girls. It takes strength confidence and a protectiveness to carefully lift to avoid injury. An essential part of this team sport. She is always always in the back. She loves it. It has been a good experience for me to see the roles opening up and being more inclusive. I saw the same in cross country running. Last two in very overweight but others came to cheer them in. The alternative would be what…sit at home alone and watch tv? It’s great experience encourage and support it and believe in her.

I wouldn’t be worried about the other children but more about the teacher being supportive. I used to love dance around the same age until another parent asked mine in front of me why I was never onstage at the performances. Turns out the teacher was positioning me directly behind the curtain as the sole “big girl” of the group. My parents were trying to have it out with the dance school without me realising. It was crushing and I didn’t return after that term finished, as well as triggering body issues.

I've been to a panto two years running that has a dance troupe and there's a bigger girl (maybe 17/18 and a size 16). She's really good! I'd say it's clear she's been doing it a good while and she seems happy and one of the better dancers. She looks naturally bigger but healthy. I'm really glad my daughter hasn't just seen skinny girls dancing.

Thanks everyone you’ve made be feel a bit more at ease.
Luckily the teachers have been brilliant and the other girls are really nice.
Shes not a brilliant dancer but loves it and has fun.
They’ve even asked her to join in a competition next weekend.
I love her so much and I try not to talk about loosing weight but just eat healthy As I don’t want her worrying about calories at such a young age. Was just so worried that I’d be exposing her to an environment that would make her feel bad about herself

I wonder if there are any other taller/bigger girls (or parents of them) who have dropped the idea of dance because they were self-conscious about their size but would go along if they knew there were others like them there. Has she got any taller/bigger friends that she could invite along too so she's not the only one and so that the word spreads that dance is for all.

If your DD has a tummy and is overweight at her age, you need to actively reduce her portion sizes and encourage healthy eating. Limit sweets, crisps, biscuits, chocolate, fizzy drinks, etc. Your DD may not have a petite frame but she need not be over-weight.

Harsh as it sounds, it won’t be long before someone in the dance group. Etc comment to her about her size, she will also begin to feel self conscious when she notices she’s fatter than others. Obviously, no-one should comment but they well - be certain of that.