to think some people enjoy babyhood more than others?

[FunnysInLaJardin]

I didn't really properly enjoy my DS's when they were babies.

I had a very short maternity leave with DS1 - 3 months- and had to go back full time after

With DS2 I was desperate to get back to work and did so after 8 months.

My niece has just had a baby and it seems to me she is loving it and is enjoying every minute.

My babies were and are beautiful but I have to say on the whole I am enjoying the teen years far more

I think everyone's different and also it depends on the baby! I'm absolutely loving the baby stage with my 7 month old but I must admit she is a relatively easy going baby.

I'd have 20 babies if I could, I love them. Up until about 4/5, then I could do with someone taking them away until they are about 12 😆. Love babies, love teens but not so keen on the bit inbetween.

Edited to add - that didn't mean I also wasn't desperate to get back to work. I love working and went back around 8 months each time, part-time for a while.

I had PND so the baby years were bitter sweet. I really struggled but absolutely loooveddd how adorable they are and how quickly they change. I don’t think I enjoyed the newborn stage that much, but loved seeing her cheeky personality as she became a toddler. Although I have friends that have absolutely loved this stage, breastfed past 1 etc.

The child years are nice. The teen years are fun, it’s like living with a mini adult sometimes and we have great chats (better than some convos I have with some adults).

I'm not that keen about other people's babies, so I was surprised by how much I enjoyed mine. DC1 was a very demanding baby, and the first couple of years were by far the hardest, and many parts of it were difficult and unpleasant, but it turned out that caring for a baby involved lots of stuff that I was good at, which really boosted my confidence in my ability as a parent which I think set me up well. I'm finding the teenage years much less work and stress, but also less fun and excitement.

Honestly loved every stage so far, she's 7, have to say makes me slightly worried what i might have to come when she's older....

Of course. It's a combination of inherent preference (some people just like babies more than others!) and also the baby you get. It wasn't my favourite stage with either of mine but I liked it a lot better with the one that slept! But yes, we're all different. I adore toddlers and don't understand why they get such a bad rap - I think they're a million times more fun and interesting than babies and so much more enjoyable. I know lots of other people who loved the baby time and endured the toddler time. Neither of us are right or wrong!

You do get the odd person who only likes the baby bit (and often seems to have a lot just so they keep having it) and loses interest after, and clearly that's not healthy. Nor is the old-fashioned, mostly dad attitude of 'they're not interesting until they're about 8 so I won't have much to do with them before that'. But having preferences and favourite and least favourite stages while being an engaged parent who can appreciate the pluses of all the stages is very normal and fine!

I hated the baby stage for all three of mine. Didn't help that I didn't have good sleepers but even so I think I would have found it boring. I generally found my kids easier the older they got.

Can't say I was a fan of small babies...my favourite years were when they were toddlers. Learning something new every day and we had a good social life!

My best friend is the opposite, loves newborns/babes in arms.

I loved the baby days and toddler. All of the stages. I sobbed in the car alone, when each of my DCs started school, because I didn't want those lovely days to be over. They are teens now. This is fun too. But the baby days are extra special.

Loved the new baby bit, struggled with toddler years. Absolutely have loved the teen years. We're all different and you shouldn't feel guilty for struggling with certain bits and enjoying certain bits more than others. I was never particularly maternal and found being at home with a small child beyond tedious much as I adored him beyond belief.

I hated the baby years with DS1. Loved the toddler years with him. Loved the baby years with DS2 (which was also when DS1 was a toddler). But the toddler years with him were absolute hell.

I've really enjoyed 7+ for both of them. They are independent. They sleep at night. They entertain themselves. But they still wanna spend time with me, have a hug and want a bedtime story. DS1 will be 11 soon and I'm not looking forward to the teen years TBH.

My mother said she loved the first three months of baby the best. “They can’t go anywhere dangerous, they feed and sleep and love you.” None of us were colicky, I note.

I’m finding 6 really tough - actually 3, 4 and 5 was 🤣🤣 but 6 is a whole new level. He’s got extremely stubborn and is a gob on a stick. Anyone else found this?

Yes. Some people love it. I was riddled with anxiety and trauma from the birth. However i loved the toddler years when you get much more back

I didnt cope well with the sleep deprivation and drugery.
But it gets better.
But yes if you have support and feel well some people really enjoy the baby time, cuddles, feeding etc. I struggled.

I was talking to a friend about this yesterday. We both have two children, however I'm also pregnant with my third and she expressed how she'd love a third but only if she could have them "ready made" at age 3+. In general, I really like the baby stage whereas she absolutely loathed it. I think it's completely normal to prefer (and/or be good at) certain stages more than others.

One other thought... there can be a stigma around saying you're not enjoying your child/a certain stage. Your niece might seem to be/say she's enjoying it but equally she might be putting a brave face on. Although I did enjoy the baby years, there was a stage where my first DS was incredibly high needs and I had PND; to most people (family and friends included) I looked like I'd nailed it and was enjoying every single moment, but I was really struggling for a while. Appearances aren't always what they seem. Then again, with DS number 2 I was genuinely just getting on with it and enjoying it, so I guess the key thing is that all experiences are different and that's fine/normal.

Adored the baby and toddler years but I love being a mum and enjoyed every single stage and age. Our ds is 18 now, 19 this year and he's still really close to both of us. He's an amazing lad - kind, mature, responsible, fun, talented and bright . The teen years are great too. I'll always love being a parent even when he's 50! You never stop being a mum/dad.

I love the baby stage. The little faces! The cuddles! I like school age but toddler years were horrific. I’m curious to see if they’re easier with DS than they were with DD, as she was a surprisingly vicious toddler (so much biting!) and we went into lockdown when she was 2 so I think that made it even worse.

Thank you @LiarLiarKnickersAblaze that seems to totally describe where we're at now!

I didn't enjoy much about the baby stage (apart from the cuddles). Partly because I was so anxious about being completely responsible for the survival of this tiny person, and partly because I missed my old life terribly.

I loved the baby and toddler years! But it seems most people on MN hate them. I’ve personally found the school years the hardest. I would love another baby again just whilst it’s a baby but don’t want another child / teen 😂

Have been thinking about this some more. Personal circumstances at the time (eg finances, health, relationships etc) massively affect how much you enjoy each stage. For me, a difficult birth, a high-needs baby and a lack of local friends/support (we had recently moved) really didn't help. I think I would have struggled anyway but these things made the baby stage worse.

I had an easy baby and didn't particularly enjoy it, they are boring and progress is slow! 1+ is much better, especially now she is talking.