To think niece is being taken advantage of?

[wevegotthepower]

My DN (age 10) is like a DD to me since my sister died a few years ago. I support her and my BIL and am quite protective.

To get to the point.

Their neighbours have two cats and DN was recently asked by them if she'd pop in and leave some food for the cats (all provided in tins) while they were away one night. DN was delighted to help, think it made her feel grown up to be asked.

This was repeated a week or so later. DN again happy and helped out.

Neighbours have now asked her to feed the cats morning and evening over four nights and change their litter box too. She's still keen to help but has clubs etc so I said I'd help too (her dad doesn't like cats at all).

But I can't help feeling the neighbours are now asking too much of her. What do you think? No payment has been made or thank you gift ever offered.

If asked again should I or BIL suggest it's now a cat sitting duty and should be paid for? Or is it teaching DN responsibility and leave well alone?

AIBU thinking DN is getting taken advantage of?

They are asking too much of a 10 yo - esp cat litter, wtf. And for no reward.

I'd be saying no thanks now.

They can pop cats in a cattery for 4 nights.

I think that is perfectly acceptable as the favour is being returned and is the sort of thing neighbours do for one another.

it is too much of a responsibility for a 10 year old

Ideally she should be paid or a gift when they return

but it’s a balancing act as long as she’s happy and doesn’t feel like she’s been thanked advantage of . She’ll probably love the responsibility and enjoy it so I’d leave it

wouldn’t say anything but thing neighbours tight

My cat sitter is half the price of the previous person but still agree they are taking advantage. I’d see what happens when they come back as they may get her something in recognition of what she’s done but if not then it stops would be my opinion.

We pay neighbours teen £6 per day to feed ours but see we are being too tight!

Reciprocal arrangements are entirely different- this is one way.

My teens got paid £20 for popping in twice a day over a weekend to do this for a neighbour. I did it myself for another neighbour and was given a box of chocolates. They are absolutely being mean and taking advantage not to offer your niece some form of payment.

£32per day to say hello to a cat and give it some food??
Hastily writing card for newsagents window offering such service (£50 per day, London prices)
And yes, i am that old!

Given that she's only 10, surely they should have asked her dad if it was OK. I wouldn't be pleased if someone asked my child to do something like that without clearing it with me. What if they had other plans?

I think her dad needs to talk with them. He should suggest that a gift, or £20 would have been a nice token of appreciation. From now on they're to check with the dad, if she can do it. Tell the niece to explain next time, I'm not sure, you'll have to check with my dad, in case we have plans. Because she's just a kid who wouldn't know, if the cat sitting interferes with any plans they might have.

This really is up to your BIL to resolve. I doubt he’ll appreciate you criticising his parenting, which is what you’re doing if you say he’s allowing people to take advantage of his daughter

I would say that you don’t feel it’s appropriate for her to be emptying litter trays. That the odd day here or there is fine but anything more then they need to find a professional. It’s great your niece has you to look out for her.

They are being very mean, and really majorly taking the piss here! I dont think you can get involved though ,its up to BIL really. A little girl shouldnt be cleaning up the litter tray either ,its not hygenic!

They are CB.
My teen feeds our neighbours cat if they go away , they give her £20 for a weekend.