This tainted what was meant to be a pleasant evening

[HelpMePleaseeee]

Okay, it didn’t ruin my night, but I went to a candlelight concert last night. It was in a cathedral and it was tiny and intimate, a string quartet played a mixture of modern songs with candles around them. It was so cute and it was a cheap but different activity with DP.

The guy next to me was scrolling through his emails the whole time, with his phone glaring into my eyes.
Everyone in front of me kept filming every song. It’s a tiny venue and we were right at the back so it did affect my view. Phone screens left right and centre. Also, on the other side of the room, constant red flashes from someone’s camera.

When did this start happening? There can’t have been more than 200 guests and it was a string quartet in a tiny venue. Why couldn’t people just listen to it?

Am I wrong here??

YANBU. I would have been annoyed. But the venue should have also enforced the rule that there's no mobile phones, the same as a theatre.

Yes I agree. Many people cannot seem to live in the moment. They film it, to watch later?! But they never do! Filming shouldn't be allowed at events.

Oh my goodness, that sounds beautiful OP.

And YANBU at all.

Yanbu @HelpMePleaseeee Its one reason we don't go to the cinema anymore, and if we do I really don't enjoy it.

I have recently seen an ad for a candlelit concert in a local church, or it may be the cathedral, where a string quartet are playing ABBA songs! I'm quite tempted to go

Well, say something rather than festering in silence!

I was at an opera last week, and a woman in front of me was on her phone. I tapped her on the shoulder and said ‘Please put it away — the light is distracting’. She did.

With a bad grace, but if it was a choice of her evening being spoiled or mine, I know which one I’d choose.

It's the light I find distracting. I went to a festive light show in December and the light of a person's phone next to me phone screen ruined the whole effect.
FuzzyManul. no need to be so defensive. There's nothing wrong with sipping water quietly. There is with people who loudly slurp any drink (in my experience usually soft drinks) throught a performance. Particularly if they are determined to suck every last drop through a straw.

Totally with you, fair enough take a quick pic but people who film it, do they actually ever watch it again? IME no. Like going to the theatre and someone next to you has an asda bag full of food and drinks rustling and slurping all the way through! Didn't ruin my night but did annoy the f**k out of me! We want to absorb the show, not see all the glaring phones or watch someone scoffing all night. I mean really, is it normal to have dinner and then constantly eat 🤔

I went to see Jonathan Pie this week
and he made a big deal about people
keeping their phones off. He’d had issues the night before apparently to the point where he had had to restart. I was completely on board with this and wish more artists/venues would do the same.

I have exactly the same thoughts, but recently I took the children to an outdoor event where they had dances and demos on. Just in the town square so not overly large, but big enough we couldnt get out theough the large crowd. There was no stage so all ground level. We barely saw anything, there were so many kids on their parents shoulders so they could see and the only saving grace so my children didn't get bored and because there was no way I could heave them up on my shoulders was the fact that so many people had their phones out and we watched their screens 😂

Take an aerosol can of black paint with you next time.

It's the only language they understand.

I have found my people! I have just got back from watching a West End play with a well known actor in one of the lead roles. I had someone in the row in front of me consistently lean forward in their seat and blocking my view. I had to tap them on the shoulder and indicate they sit back (gentle tap and gesture because, you know, the play was in progress so not appropriate to speak). They then proceeded to move around causing intermittent blocking of the view for me and others. After the interval they then got into a series of text conversations on their phone. Again, gentle tap on shoulder to ask them to stop (after a neighbouring theatregoer asked them to stop and was ignored) because it was a crucial scene in the play. I was told that they had to urgently answer so I gently replied that if it was so urgent they needed to retire to the lobby of the theatre. Funnily enough after that it was no longer urgent. After the play ended they then tried to engage me in conversation and say that me touching them on the shoulder was invading their space. I suggested they familiarise themselves with theatre etiquette and not ruin the experience with their own self absorption. It was such a shame as a brilliant play was significantly impacted by their behaviour for the entire time and they were oblivious of the impact on not just me but others next to me who, afterwards, expressed their unhappiness. It was a shame it wasn’t picked up by the stewards but I fear that this is the least of their problems nowadays.

I’m so cross about it that I felt the need to sign up to MN today when I saw this thread to share my experience!

Don’t moan to the venue. The rules on filming are up to the production company, the venue generally get no say.

Its fucking infuriating.

Agree 100% .
I would love venues to do this!!!!
I can’t understand the point of visiting a gig and then spending the whole time behind your mobile. Madness!

I went to the theatre recently and the man in front of me had his phone picking up the audio and transcribing (a bit like subtitles on his phone).

The backlight was so bright it was distracting me from watching the play so I asked him to dim the screen. He did, then in the interval I was told by the usher he had a disability so was permitted to use his phone so the second half of the play he turned the brightness back up. I left before the end because of it.

Just for context, my brother is Deaf (since birth) and I teach BSL so am not intolerant of adjustments!

It's been an issue at gigs for a while. Sometimes to the extent that I can't even see the big screens for people holding phones up.
They can piss off with their making memories by destroying everyone else's.

Because they want a memory to look back on?
No one is as obsessed as taking pictures/videos in concerts as people are on MN.

I sympathise OP. This drives me mad! Whether it's at a big venue,where I'm trying to see through about 200 phones being held up,or at a smaller venue,where the guy in front of me was constantly looking at his phone with the light distracting me. I don't honestly know what the solution is.

Would love to see phone lockers at the entrance to every venue.

100% agree OP

I'd feedback to the venue, they could request phones off at the start, that's v common practice

That wouldn't stop filming

I always think ‘you haven’t got enough life left to rewatch all this stuff’.

I went to a candle light ballet performance and it was the same, no photos until the very end performance. I was so pleased as I have had many events that have been diminished by the constant use of phones.

I hate this, I go to as many concerts as I can as I’ll be completely deaf within a few years. I love music and I’ll be sad when I can’t hear it any more. I’m short aswell,
I normally take a few pics and videos at the beginning but then phone goes away so I can enjoy the show, however all I ever see is phones! It’s really distracting for the artists aswell. People dont seem to be able to enjoy the moment any more without getting a device out.