to ask why ponce-tastic-ness is only "okay" at Christmas? And what else are you prepared to admit to the other 11 months of the year!!

[PoncingIsNotJustForChristmasButForLife]

So I have in the past lurked unsuccessfully I hasten to add on the poncey threads at Christmas, you know the sort of thing: -
the sloe gins carefully started in September the previous years
the homemade marmalades,
the paper whites carefully grown in tasteful vases etc
DIY wreaths
elegant tables
elaborate cakes
magazine worthy wrapping etc etc

Now of course, Xmas is the most wonderful time of the year so a bit of poncing is somehow “allowed”.

But I am wondering how much other stuff happens that is ponce-tastic year round and why we (I) are attracted to that poncy stuff?
Why do we want to do it?
I ask this as a self-confessed wannabe ponceur/ponceuse who has a house filled with items that haven’t quite managed to ponce with. I see evidence of my attraction to it in my house - Sarah Raven catalogues, aspirational cookery books, fountain pens for my correspondence. I’m not Lizzie Bennett but a p/t working mum with a string of whatsapp’s to answer and loads of laundry to fold and not iron.

I also feel that there's a whole pile of other “preenworthy” type stuff like this that others must do. Is it to feel “grown up”, to impress others, to feel smug .
e.g. I know I feel some bizarre sense of smugness baking a cake, even if it’s not elaborate!
AIBU to ask what it is that makes us want to do this kind of poncing?
And then also the self-deprecating laugh/ jokes that come alongside it.

I wish I could be more poncy(sp?).
It feels like it takes time I don't have right now but.....just you wait until the kids are grown and I have retired!!

I want to be poncey. I want a spring wreath and an easter tree. I want special jars for my Daz tablets.
Closest I've got at the moment is a glass hand soap in the ensuite. Gifted to me by my aunt who didn't like the glass. I love it and have already bought a refill.

(I already have a gin glass, wine glasses, cut glass wine glasses, champagne flutes (mine are really special beautiful ones and only come out on super poncey days), shot glasses, tumblers and pint glasses)

I love the carafe of water - but need to get a proper bedside table first.

I adore the poncetastic thread! Excellent thread @PoncingIsNotJustForChristmasButForLife ☺

I'd love to be a dedicated poncer and I was years ago but one of my DC (autistic) can't cope with Sensory overload for Xmas etc so we keep it low key. He'll be quite upset by the tree etc so it's all very minimal.

That said, please share my joy, for valentines day he tried some heart shaped potato product from lidl. My heart almost burst. That was my most recent ponce attempt and for this house, a roaring success!

I do level up the ponce for Christmas food though and my favourite chutney i make (Mary Berry recipe) I use cinnamon sticks with some red and green twine to decorate the jars for my neighbours gifts.
Maybe I could look for a spring alternative, jam maybe and decorate my wee jars with pastel coloured twine?

I'd love a house like a selina lake book, when my wee lad ill have one room for my poncey haven that if it overwhelms him he can choose to not go in, I will spam you all with my ponce!

@Mumdiva99, I love glass. Back when I had money & energy for poncing (it takes both), I collected the most fabulous hand-blown wine, champagne and cocktail glasses. The most amazing ones were Czech, very thin and decorated with different colours of glass or gilded.

I am a clumsy person. Not a single one of my delicately unique works of art for imbibing lasted two years: several got smashed first time out 😳 I can't bear keeping beautiful things For Best; they should be used and enjoyed ... but repeatedly, not destroyed soon after creation!

I buy glasses from supermarkets. Even if I could afford lovely ones, I wouldn't have them now. My ownership was a form of expensive vandalism.

Jo's a friend of mine from the olden days. While her style isn't my style, she very much fills her world with beauty! Behold, poncetastiques of Mumsnet:

I don’t think there’s anything “poncetastic’ about making home-made food and drink! (On the entire thread, only the chicken coop having its own door wreath qualifies, and decanting your washing up liquid into crystal!) And Lizzie Bennet is no ponceuse — she’s the unpretentious one who prefers a plain dish to a ragout, gets tanned when travelling, and walks three miles cross country to see her sick sister, and shows up at the Netherfield breakfast table all muddy…

I've done one since we lived in Germany, I try to find pussy willow but usually end up with something else, and I have a 45+years old set of wooden Easter decorations for it. If that makes me 'poncey' so be it! Definitely no fluffy chicks in sunglasses though.

Ooh I loved that book - you should get that OP

I used to have a real lifestyle porn thing going on - never did any of it that I can recall just fantasised about it.

But I have long accepted that in fact I am the most CBA person on the planet and now just focus on experiences. I’d recommend it

I do this a lot. I have a cutting flower garden and an antique trug that used to belong to my granny. I ponce about with vases and flowers all the time. I grow a lot of herbs and use them a lot in cooking and wear a linen apron to do it in. Makes me so happy!

I think I might qualify for this thread!!
I have crystal decanters with whiskey in them (dh drinks it)

A painted armoir in the kitchen with a collection of glases (my weakness for the past 30+ years)

I refurbished my grandparents china cabinet & it's in my kitchen housing an entire collection of super pretty PiP Studio table wear

I have a special cupboard for tablecloths & napkins

I decant my washing up liquid but using crystal is a level up for me- v inspiring!

I have a yellow glass fronted yellow bedlinen cupboard in our bedroom for our sheets & duvet covers

I saved & lovingly collected a set of cushions for the sitting room that were so ridiculously expensive that I won't let dh use them. He has a special skill of utterly destroying cushions & pillows by totally bunching them up - he'll regularly use the top edge of the pillow to lie on instead of the flat part (hard to describe). I walk in to admire these cushions regularly!

I, too, must have the correct glass / cup/ plate/ bowl for the the food & drink & I've (mostly) trained dh too now. Of course I'll gratefully accept anything given to me in sometime else's house. I do judge bars / restaurants & love to receive a drink in a beautiful glass if I'm out. I'll take a photo.

I always have at least 2 vases / jugs of cut flowers all year round. Usually seasonal ones from Aldi but at the moment I have 2 beautiful vases of flowers - red & white roses from valentines day & white & purple birthday flowers. They being me so much happiness every time I see them

I have a very old antique chaise longe in my bedroom inherited from my grandparents who bought it at an antique auction when they were young.

I have a lot of antiques & vintage objects mixed into the more modern furniture. I live in a house that's almost 200 years old

I ponce all year round, in hundreds of different ways.
But it’s entirely for me, it makes me happy and brightens up my day. I can’t remember the last time we had visitors, and my family just deal with it as I deal with their eccentricities.
Cooking for celebrations, home made wreaths and plant decorations, using containers and cutlery and vessels that feel nice in my hands…changing my throws and bits and bobs as the seasons turn and reusing things as the appropriate time of year. It’s my hygge.

@Garlickit I love the sound of hand blown glass. (You should check out the local charity shops to start collecting again).
In my old house I had a glass cabinet in the kitchen to display glasses. Husband moved in and filled it with crap - receipts, keys, medicine, Chang etc etc I was never filled with the joy again.

One day I will have a place to show it off. (Needless to say that will unfortunately be when I am alone 🤣 Husband doesn't get poncey. He thinks a picture on the wall is unnecessary.)

Mumdiva, why wait?
You need to talk to him, and he needs to find another place for his stuff.
My family aren’t bothered about endless celebrations and plants and my garden, but they respect my need for them and accommodate it without mocking or eye-rolling.
In the same way that I don’t see the need for some of their nonsense, but it matters to them, so we make space for each other. Physically and mentally.

The Rita Konig book is called Domestic Bliss. It’s great.

I do this stuff year-round. Don’t particularly see it as poncey though and don’t do it to impress other people (how would they know, anyway?) I’m always planting daffs in a tub or foraging for a wreath or painting eggs and hanging them on twigs. Just a sort of low-skill crafting 🤷‍♀️

Thanks for this thread, OP! I love a bit of poncery and there are some inspired ideas on here.
I'm looking at my pink glass carafe and water glass right now.
I am also a minimalist so sometimes there's a bit of a clash, unfortunately.

I have a tea cup and a mug for my work tea in the office. I travel a lot so everytime I fly through Heathrow I grab a box of fortnum and masons silk bagged Earl grey. Because it’s my favourite. The Earl only gets drunk from the tea cup. Only tetly from the mug.

I also have a thing for nice stationery. For meetings I only use a moleskine notebook. That’s my ponce. For Al other things it’s a regular spiral bound pad.

I aspire to poncey but never achieve it! This thread is wonderful though, living vicariously through you all. I’m vividly imagining my imaginary wreath for my imaginary chicken coop… it’s looks fantastic, I’ll have you know 😁

Don't be using the world 'ponce' in East London, will you? It means a whole world of difference.

I stopped growing vegetables and changed my kitchen garden over to flowers for cutting. I have a vase of fresh flowers on my kitchen table all through the Summer and give flowers to friends and family when I am invited for lunch. Gives me enormous joy.

I can only wish to be more poncey. I'm too disorganised to remember to buy a spring wreath (or make one) for the front door. By the time I'd get organised enough to make one it'll be autumn and I'd need a different one. I had friends who used to change out the hand towels and door wreaths etc for each season and holiday. Rabbit ornaments appeared at Easter and Autumn leaves bowls and cups for September.

I found some lovely shaped pegs in a charity shop. I painted them a suitable colour to match the other ones in my cloakroom area and fixed them to the wall. They are at small child height and are just for my grandchildren to use. My grandson comes every Monday. He's nearly 2. He was thrilled that he had grown up pegs for his coat and bag and a space for his shoes underneath. They look so lovely and so cute. He spent all day wanting his coat on and then off so he could hang it up by himself like he has seen all the adults do. It's totally poncy and unnecessary and I could just bung his things anywhere but it makes me smile everytime I walk past it.

😁 I'm reminded of that scene in Withnail and I. "PONCE!"

I grown my own herbs and salad vegetables. When I ask one of the kids to fetch some sage from the garden I feel 50% smug, 50% knobhead, which I reckon is about what the MN Poncetastic Venn diagram would look like.

I ponce therefore I am.......

@Ciri @PoncingIsNotJustForChristmasButForLife
@PyongyangKipperbang

This is excellent, could we please have a poncing throughout the year thread? With photos. It could do wonders for the mental health of all of MN and indeed the nation.

I have a love of coupe glasses for champagne cos my granny and great aunts had them. Somehow it never occurred to me I could spring them from their mid century prison and have them myself!!!