This issue has been discussed often but looking for opinions on how to proceed.
Been close friends since the start of uni, I got married and had kids before her but always remained close..she moved further away an extra 2 hours further north just before I had my kids. I still went to visit her for the occasional weekends despite having young kids. She asked me to be her bridesmaid I made every effort to travel for all.the appointments etc..except now she has a child it's like she cannot leave him even for a few hours to catch up half way between us (there is a city we can both travel by direct train line, roughly halfway).
I didn't mind the first few years as I understand some people are very reluctant to leave their child but he is now almost 6.
I don't push at all but every time we are in the phone it's.'I must get down to you, must get organised ' etc.
I would prefer if she just said nothing as I would love to see her but I've made the effort the past 6 years (not last year as we.had a family bereavement). Her partner is supportive. We had a weekend trip organised by me for our 2 families just after covid, she was unwilling to leave her son to even go for a coffee alone together while our partners minded the kids. She was very enthusiastic about the trip. But it wouldn't have happened unless I organised it. So essentially I have not seen her alone since she had her son.
We get on so.well and have such a laugh (now solely on the phone) and I do really lover her but it's just a phone friendship and I feel let down that she doesn't want to catch up properly in person.
Should I say something the next time she calls and says we're coming down or leave it? I say to her I'd.love to see you all you are more than welcome just give me a heads up on date but then nothing and then nothing...
Thanks for reading.