Many years ago I used to model for art classes. Occasionally the artists would kindly give me their sketches. One has been for years in DH room he uses to listen to music, hobbies etc and I always thought it was nice it was there. Just tacked up on the wall casually.
The classes were life drawing so I am unclothed, sitting on a chair, breasts and tummy are seen but it’s in no way a sexy pose nor representation.
DH has big problems understanding or connecting with other people’s feelings. Also to avoid drip feed, his issues with sex led to me feeling rubbish about my body. The respect and appreciation I got from modelling did a lot to help me heal.
This morning I found the painting torn up in a bin. I felt really upset and asked him why he had done it. He said he thought I didn’t like the painting and said I’d told him I didn’t like it a few days ago so he was doing it for me. I told him I was upset because it reminded me of a good period in my life - and that I was always happy he had it in his room. I denied ever saying I didn’t like it (why would I?).
DH then predictably lost his rag, shouted etc, told me it was my fault for giving him the wrong impression “, looked at his watch while I spoke, shouted that “this is a ridiculous situation”. To be clear, I hadn’t cried, got visibly upset, I just told him that what he had done had upset me.
He basically didn’t acknowledge that what he had done had hurt me and simply kept angrily repeating that it was my fault for giving him the impression that I didn’t like the picture.
AIBU - I should accept he made a mistake and suck it up
IANBU - He destroyed something I liked, and which had good memories for me, without consulting me, and is making it my fault.