To ask if you are or feel lucky? Does luck have a lot to with happiness?

[HolyGuacamole28]

Light hearted post. I have challenges in my life - COL hit us hard - mortgage payment through the roof, both working full time, 2 kids in nursery so fees are eye watering, energy bills are stupid, quality of life decreasing etc etc. However, I know I’m also very lucky. I have a house, a husband, 2 kids born via ivf (1st time and then a first time frozen transfer: the odds of that are nuts) reasonable health (at least physical!) and great friends and supportive family. Had a lovely childhood and was encouraged through education to push myself into having a career. No stealth brag here, just want to know if others feel lucky despite the shit show that is this country at the moment. Is the lottery of birth really a deciding factor in destiny or can we change it? Is luck something that comes to all of us at some point? I’ve had 2 glasses of wine so apologies for the randomness :-).

I don't think this is a lighthearted post I can't get anywhere near an answer without some thought and careful wording. Either that or two glasses of wine

near on all of our lives are down to luck- you’d have to be completely oblivious to the goings on in the world not to recognise that. Born in the U.K. to relatively decent parents- I’m incredibly lucky!

I'm lucky. I think everyone who has a generally good life has been lucky. They may have worked hard but they have had the genetics, the opportunities and the ability to turn their efforts into good fortune.

I am lucky. Yes, bad things have happened to me during my life, but I’m really bloody lucky and very grateful for what I have. There’s things I’d like more of or wish I’d done differently, but nothing that I desperately need or want, and overall I’m good.

I don’t think luck is something that everyone gets at some point unfortunately. I suspect being born into a family that loves and cares gives someone a massive advantage over those who aren’t which isn’t fair. That’s not to say they can’t change the course of their life, but I think there’s a degree of confidence that comes from that initial ingrained security of knowing your family has your back, it gives a building block for life. A positive mindset probably helps with feeling lucky as one can see the good things amongst the shit, and a belief that if you hang on in there things will get better. Certainly when I was suicidal knowing that it would destroy my parents if I did it helped me to keep putting one foot in front of the other until things did get better for me.

Most people deserve good luck, not everyone is lucky enough to get it.

Yes I feel lucky, in the sense that I am grateful for the good things in my life.
Objectively I am probably pretty average. Single parent, lots of stress, fairly low paid job but I have amazing kids, a couple of wonderful friends, my own house (mortgaged!) and a job I enjoy. I’d say I’m very lucky 🍀

Yes, I know full well how ridiculously lucky I am. And yes, it doesn’t mean that I haven’t worked hard for what I have but I won the genetic and cultural lottery alongside having fab parents. I’ve also been in the right place at the right time frequently (most recently when a colleague had to resign for health reasons and I was tapped on the shoulder to apply for her role…which was one I’d been considering applying for elsewhere…wouldn’t have happened if I’d been lazy but a huge dollop of timing luck there).

Super interesting reading. Better to feel and be lucky than be told you are…

We are on a rock travelling around 1 of 100 billion stars. Our chances of being born are about 1 in 400 trillion. You're not special, but you are fucking lucky. Enjoy your amazing life. You'll never exist again.”
― Ricky Gervais
I feel beyond lucky with my existence.

I am lucky - I'm aware that things like a comfortable middle class upbringing with loving parents has given me a massive advantage. I have had bad things happen, made massive mistakes but things have turned out okay and I'm happy. I'm also aware that things could change - losing DH or one of the DC would be horrific and is always a fear - I don't believe the luck I've had so far protects me from that. But I'm also not stupid enough to think my privilege is simply a result of hard work!

I bought a book called Determined by Robert Sapolsky (which turned out to be enormous so I can't get through it) the premise of which is that you have no "free will" and that everything that happens is more or less "determined" by birth e.g., your parents, your genetics, where you live etc. I was born to parents who were/went on to be wealthy and successful, but I was adopted into a poor family with a LOT of issues, my dad was a functioning alcoholic, mum died when I was 13, so I am intrigued - how was that "determined"? What sort of luck was that? Surely just random?

I think being born into Western society, having access to healthcare, education, jobs, transport and (when I was young at least!) housing makes me very lucky. However, people I know would say its not lucky unless you have plenty of money too and that does annoy me.

"But I'm also not stupid enough to think my privilege is simply a result of hard work!"

@PlainJaneSuperbrainthe2nd yeah see now that's a good attitude I think. Obviously a carer on minimum wage works hard, but that doesn't really get them anywhere, they simply earn enough to live day to day (hopefully), so its not just hard work - there are other elements at play.

I think that sometimes ( and "sometimes" is doing some heavy lifting here) lucky/ not lucky is/can be a state of mind.

My sister once said I was so very unlucky to have had cancer three times. I thought I was lucky because I'd survived cancer three times, and never had to go through chemo.

I feel incredibly lucky every night when I climb into bed and I'm safe and warm, and my bedroom is clean, and my bathroom is private, and my house is secure, and my children are loved, and there is water in the tap and food in the fridge and tomorrow will start with a hungry cat and a coffee in a pretty mug.

I'm being genuine here. I feel overwhelmed by how lucky I feel in that moment sometimes - because it's just dumb luck that I have any of that stuff. I didn't do anything to deserve it other than get born in the right place at the right time.