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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

BaroqueInterlude · 17/02/2024 11:23

Some irony in using WhatsApp for this campaign 😃

coodawoodashooda · 17/02/2024 11:29

BaroqueInterlude · 17/02/2024 11:23

Some irony in using WhatsApp for this campaign 😃

That's what I thought.

Flamingogirl08 · 17/02/2024 11:40

No, it's nonsense. Smart phones are part of life, I'm on mine right now writing this.

Have healthy limits in place and educate yourself on cyber security. Speak to your kids about safety.

Banning smartphones doesn't solve the problem especially as they are pretty much needed for most parts of life now. They need to be taught how to navigate the world we live in not shielded from everything.

Hairspray123 · 17/02/2024 11:45

I would be 100% behind no smart phones for interacting to help with bullying but it wont ever happen as they are part of life

Whenwordsfail · 17/02/2024 11:45

As someone that uses a "dumb" phone there needs to be some pretty big restructuring of lots of things if we want to reduce the need for smart phones till a later age

Lots of things geared towards teens use social media eg our local teen mental health drop in advertises through Facebook and Instagram and you book online. Kids homework has an increasingly smart phone, app side to it

This week for example i couldn't check my bus times, order in pizza hut (qr code on table), pay for parking or pick up my cinema tickets without some difficulty due to not having Internet on my phone.

piglet81 · 17/02/2024 11:56

How did you find your local group?

sunandfog · 17/02/2024 12:52

@piglet81

@smartphonefreechildhood | Linktree The links to regional groups are here!

@Whenwordsfail I hear you - I also have a brick phone. My worst thing is paying for parking! But I feel overall I would rather face those struggles than have something in my pocket that I was clearly addicted to.

@smartphonefreechildhood | Linktree

A grassroots movement of parents uniting for a smartphone free childhood

https://linktr.ee/smartphonefreechildhood

OP posts:
MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 17/02/2024 13:02

My dd is an adult now, so this isn't really relevant to me any more. I do understand why some people want to ban smartphones for under 16s but I'm not sure that this is necessarily the best solution. I think it's much more realistic to invest greater efforts in educating both parents and children in order to help children navigate the technology more safely.

I was actually immensely grateful for dd's smartphone and social media in the lockdown periods... they were a lifeline for my extremely extroverted dd who would have otherwise struggled enormously as a result of having been cut off from her friends.

I tend to think that social media doesn't actually cause problems. Rather, it has the potential to exacerbate existing problems. Is that a good reason to ban them for all kids, including those who use them perfectly sensibly? I'm not sure tbh.

HelloMiss · 17/02/2024 14:11

They won't ever get this

Ridiculous

SmashedPrawnsInAMilkyBasket · 17/02/2024 14:15

Surely this doesn’t need a ban? If you don’t want your child to have a smartphone, don’t give them one. If a lot of other parents feel the same and do the same, then they’ll stop being a necessity. Problem solved without the need for legislation.

Laiste · 17/02/2024 14:23

Our primary school is experiencing problems with some pupils with smart phones showing other kids inappropriate stuff on the way to and from school.

It's all very well saying ''if you don't want one don't buy one'' or ''simply have the correct safety in place'' - but you can't police what other parents are doing. They don't seem to know or care what their kids are looking at or sharing.

We're talking about 8 year olds here. Primary aged kids don't need a smart phone.

HelloMiss · 17/02/2024 14:24

Parents need to parent their kids

And iPads are just as bad as smartphones

SongbirdGarden · 17/02/2024 14:31

I very rarely use my smartphone and my son never had one until he was 16, because he didn't want one, he wasn't interested, he said he wouldn't use it. It was never an issue, he wasn't bullied or ridiculed, he just had the confidence to be himself.

Anewuser · 17/02/2024 14:39

This will never happen.

Too many parents give their children smart phones without parental controls. They don’t care what their child looks at, are happy for them to have TikTok, instagram etc. They have no idea what their child posts on social media until another parent complains to school. Then they just defend their own child’s behaviour.

Laiste · 17/02/2024 14:40

Thinking about it more - primary aged kids wandering about with smart phones showing their mates stuff - it's like sending your kid to a house where you have no idea what they might put on the telly for your kid to see!

Porn? Horror? ... it's worrying. They're so young.

gamerchick · 17/02/2024 14:44

SmashedPrawnsInAMilkyBasket · 17/02/2024 14:15

Surely this doesn’t need a ban? If you don’t want your child to have a smartphone, don’t give them one. If a lot of other parents feel the same and do the same, then they’ll stop being a necessity. Problem solved without the need for legislation.

Well that would make too much sense though.

Laiste · 17/02/2024 14:48

SmashedPrawnsInAMilkyBasket · Today 14:15

Surely this doesn’t need a ban? If you don’t want your child to have a smartphone, don’t give them one. If a lot of other parents feel the same and do the same, then they’ll stop being a necessity. Problem solved without the need for legislation.

A lot of other parents DO feel the same. It's the odd few, as usual, causing the problem. Sadly the school has no control over what the kids use the phones for before arriving and after leaving the school grounds.

Laiste · 17/02/2024 14:49

I just want to reiterate, that in our case we're talking primary age kids.

SmashedPrawnsInAMilkyBasket · 17/02/2024 15:26

Laiste · 17/02/2024 14:48

SmashedPrawnsInAMilkyBasket · Today 14:15

Surely this doesn’t need a ban? If you don’t want your child to have a smartphone, don’t give them one. If a lot of other parents feel the same and do the same, then they’ll stop being a necessity. Problem solved without the need for legislation.

A lot of other parents DO feel the same. It's the odd few, as usual, causing the problem. Sadly the school has no control over what the kids use the phones for before arriving and after leaving the school grounds.

Do you honestly believe that, given their behaviour now, those children and those parents would adhere to a ban? It’s like the ban on dangerous dogs: those people who adhere to it aren’t the ones that are causing the problem. It’s not going to change the behaviour of the people who need to change, but will impact negatively on others. It’s parenting that needs to change in this instance, and you just can’t legislate for that.

Laiste · 17/02/2024 16:05

Oh ok. We won't make any legislation around child safety any more because 'some people will just ignore it anyway' 🙄

Not even because maybe the school could do with a leg to stand on trying to protect their pupils? Including the ones being given the smart phones.

10ThousandSpoons · 17/02/2024 16:07

BaroqueInterlude · 17/02/2024 11:23

Some irony in using WhatsApp for this campaign 😃

Yes as I was reading it I thought it must be a spoof!

RawBloomers · 17/02/2024 17:14

I’d be really pissed off if you banned my kids from a useful tool that make their and my life easier and better because you can’t handle teaching them how to use it and supervising it. My kids use the “smart” bit of their smart phones to get around on public transport, do their school work, manage their money, talk to their family abroad, arrange to meet up, learn Spanish, keep their schedules, and read books, amoung many other things.

They also use a fair bit of social media. I realise a lot of teens have problems with social media, but it’s not universally bad. I’d get behind a campaign that tried to look at the pockets of kids that are using it well (like my teens and their mates seem to) and try and replicate those practices. Also campaigns that, with the appropriate evidence, regulated how social media companies work. But not a ban on something that keeps them connected to peers and lets them pursue interests.

What’s the point of just banning social media until 16? Plenty of adults who never had smart phones as kids seems to be unable to use it well. How are we developing good practice by just banning?

FloofyBird · 17/02/2024 18:41

Maybe parents should lead by example....

EarringsandLipstick · 17/02/2024 18:43

Flamingogirl08 · 17/02/2024 11:40

No, it's nonsense. Smart phones are part of life, I'm on mine right now writing this.

Have healthy limits in place and educate yourself on cyber security. Speak to your kids about safety.

Banning smartphones doesn't solve the problem especially as they are pretty much needed for most parts of life now. They need to be taught how to navigate the world we live in not shielded from everything.

👏👏👏👏

Absolutely this.

Different families & children will have different requirements and reasons for having / not having smartphones.

This silly collectivism is really annoying.

EarringsandLipstick · 17/02/2024 18:44

RawBloomers · 17/02/2024 17:14

I’d be really pissed off if you banned my kids from a useful tool that make their and my life easier and better because you can’t handle teaching them how to use it and supervising it. My kids use the “smart” bit of their smart phones to get around on public transport, do their school work, manage their money, talk to their family abroad, arrange to meet up, learn Spanish, keep their schedules, and read books, amoung many other things.

They also use a fair bit of social media. I realise a lot of teens have problems with social media, but it’s not universally bad. I’d get behind a campaign that tried to look at the pockets of kids that are using it well (like my teens and their mates seem to) and try and replicate those practices. Also campaigns that, with the appropriate evidence, regulated how social media companies work. But not a ban on something that keeps them connected to peers and lets them pursue interests.

What’s the point of just banning social media until 16? Plenty of adults who never had smart phones as kids seems to be unable to use it well. How are we developing good practice by just banning?

Great post. Agree 💯

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