Mat Leave and Career Panic

[Eddieegg]

I’m 32 weeks pregnancy with DC1.

I’ve been feeling really down about my job for a while. Feel completely stuck, waiting for a promotion but the company is squeezed financially so all are on hold. I moved teams recently and feel micromanaged. Keep seeing my peers passing me by and earning more.

Now that I’m going on maternity leave I’m really panicking about how my career will pan out when I’m back. I find myself spending hours on LinkedIn/indeed torturing myself over jobs I could apply for but can’t as I’m almost due, or panicking that when I go back after mat leave there won’t be any new jobs around.

Is it normal to feel conflicted like this? I want to enjoy time with my new baby but wish I had got further in my career before I got pregnant. I’m 34 as well so feel like time is running out for my career!

I think it’s pretty normal to feel like that about your career. Obviously your career will change once you have a child, as you’re balancing childcare, possibly reduced hours, likelihood of needing to take days off when your baby inevitably picks up all sorts of sickness from other kids etc. But to be honest there’s not a lot you can do about it until baby is here - you don’t know how you’ll feel about work once you’ve got a child. You may be looking forward to getting back to work and want to do full time, or you may want to spend some days with baby and go part time instead and for a few years your career just not be as important. It doesn’t mean that you’ll never progress or find another job. There’s lots of women in the workplace who have children and are in managerial / well paid positions etc. So don’t worry too much.

In all honesty I would just be prepared to embrace change.

Maternity leave and having kids does affect things;

Going back part tme

Lack of sleep

Being stuck in a company after you go back because you have stay for x months after getting enhanced mat pay

Taking more time off because your kid is ill, especially when going into childcare for the first time

Both times my job has/will have changed completely after returning to work. Has happened to quite a few of my friends as well.

Also i can assure you when the baby arrives, you won’t be thinking about work.

I felt the same. When you're at work you can't imagine not being there but once you have your baby you won't be able to imagine going back.

Completely normal imo x

To add a different slant, I felt like this pre maternity leave and it gave me the kick up the backside to do something about it. From about 6 months in I started polishing up my CV, set my LinkedIn as open to opportunities, and went back to a new and much better paid job. Give yourself some grace for now but keep the opportunity in the back of your mind (and check enhanced mat pay payback first).

Take the mat leave as an opportunity to rest and reset. My career has flourished since I had kids - I went back full time, baby at about 8m old after both my pregnancies.

What's the situation with mat pay where you are, will you have to repay any if you don't go back?

It’s a good package where I work, over 6 months full pay and I don’t need to pay it back. I think I’m just catastrophising that after my mat leave there won’t be any jobs out there! Probably just starting to feel more real now that baby is nearly here.

Honestly, no value in worrying about this over the next few months.

You aren't going to move before the baby is here. Then mat leave.

There are going to be plenty more jobs around to find in future. Try to put it out of your mind.

It probably is. In all honesty after having my children work has, at best been a thing for myself out the house and a money earner. At worst (and quite a lot of the time), a ginormous pain in the a**e with all the other things I have to do/ know about. A lot of the time a mix between the two. I’d go on the mat leave, see how you feel when you’re going back. You might want a career change or to take time off with you child. you might go back around work and be super efficient and get all the promotions then . Maybe stop comparing yourself to others…..

As long as you don't get laid off during your mat leave you will be able to come back to work feeling tired but refreshed. Do you miss out on any performance reviews whilst you're off? If so, do you get a 'default' rating, or do they take the last rating you got as an indication as to how you'd perform if you were at work?

Interviewing immediately after returning from mat leave is hard work as you're out of the loop and therefore out of practise in your field, but you can get there.

I’m 34 as well so feel like time is running out for my career!
You'll still have about 30 years' worth of work after you return from mat leave 😆

I returned from mat leave three years ago. My career has gone from strength to strength since I returned despite (or maybe because of?) working part time for most of it. Having a child made me so much more focused, so much less inclined to take any shit and gave me confidence to apply for what has been my dream job. My career has progressed more in the few years since I've had a child than in the 15 years before that.

It's not something however that you should be worrying about now! You should focus on yourself and your baby. The career stuff can come later.

One thing I did that was very helpful to me from a career perspective though was to obtain an additional qualification while on maternity leave. It kept my brain engaged but I didn't start it until my DS was over 6 months old (and I was starting to get bored)

It’s natural to feel like that. You’re taking probably the biggest break of your career. But you will still have a job to go back to and you can do something about it later if you’re still not happy. Your mat leave will fly over and before you know it you’ll be facing going back to work and just wanting more time off with your little one.

I remember being so stressed when I went on Mat leave as my FT contract ended halfway through and no one could tell me if it was going to be renewed. I had visions of living on LinkedIn and job sites when I should have been caring for my newborn. I ended up getting told about a promotion opportunity at work (for a permanent role) when DS was 10 days old. I applied immediately (believe me, writing a job application with full blown baby brain was not fun). Had an interview when he was 6 weeks old, got the job and they held it open for me until I went back full time after 9 months off. I never would have believed that could have been possible, but it shows things can and do happen out of nowhere. So please don’t feel your career has to suffer because of your maternity leave or having a child. That’s not the case at all if you don’t want it to be.