To be thinking so much about a stranger??

[reallynotastalker]

I know this may seem odd .. I'm a gay woman. I was recently admitted to hospital (emergency) but I am fine and was out within a day.

Anyway, while there I was treated by a female doctor who I strongly suspect is also gay.
We spoke briefly. There was just something about her. Have thought about her a lot since. This was weeks ago.
Is this just mad? I don't know her name or anything.
I just wish I could see her again but there's not much chance really unless I'm admitted into hospital!

It’s very common when vulnerable to feel a connection to staff. Gratitude and fear amplify emotions. Essentially you are scared and staff do their job,you’re disproportionately grateful. Irrespective of whether the do is gay or not she’s bound by GMC code it’s pretty clear DO NOT get into relationships with the patient. It’s inappropriate and it’s an abuse of power.

Do not go looking for her , that’s actually very scary and unsettling, it’s intrusive.

This is spot on. Everything is heightened in A&E. A doctor who is kind to you can feel like some kind of saviour, one who is brusque can seem unbelievably cruel. The doctor was just doing her job and I’m afraid you’ll just have to try to put her out of your mind.

I was in hospital recently, the staff were amazing. I'm dropping a card and some treats in next week.
An option perhaps?

By all means yes,tbh it’s just nice and bit embarrassing when people say thanks . Glad you’re out and making a recovery

I really don't want to come across odd or stalkery ..

@ZekeZeke
Yes that did cross my mind but not sure if it would look odd. It was around 4 weeks ago I was there.

Well, honestly I’d say leave it, don’t approach her or attempt to initiate contact
No cards, no drop in,mo pretext to pop up or contact the doctor. For all reasons I’ve e given and the fact you felt a connection and want to see her again

glad you had good care, leave it as that

I used to do that, when I was a teen though. People I'd meet briefly on a night out. This was in the days before you could track people down via social media, etc!

It's your mind creating a fantasy, we don't know anything about these strangers or their lives.

After a while the thoughts fade.

@Cheshiresun
I am wondering if it is that. Creating a fantasy because that's all I've been doing - fantasising. Really frustrating. I was only there for a matter of hours and now she's on my mind quite a bit

All the above is true. Get busy/busier. Doing something new is even better. Anything enjoyable and absorbing. You’ll think about her less and at some point will think, “Yes, she was very nice to me when I was vulnerable, that’s why she stayed on my mind.”

Do you have form for this OP, as in do you often find yourself building castles in the air around strangers?

Definitely leave it, for you it meant something for the Dr.. Just another shift.

As a HCP it would put her in a terrible position because patient relationships are a real no go.

As a HCP I have had patients try to add me to social media, it totally goes against our professional code, it's a progressional breach.

I used to do this before I was medicated for (severe) ADHD... But also it's normal(ish) to create attachments to people who help us in a time of need. Just get busy and take your mind off it. I wouldn't drop anything into a&e as thanks.

@Selenaso
It has happened before where I've felt like this. It's awful really because it can completely take over my mind. I know it's a fantasy and I don't really know her.

It is a fantasy, beautiful doctor who saves during the emergency also you falls for your charms.

Did you say anything particular remarkable that she might have been taken by when you spoke briefly or did you look particularly ravishing?

So actually the issue isn’t the doctor it’s you, your reaction to them and subsequent intrusive thoughts and fantasies
You are creating a narrative and what if that has no factual basis. Getting preoccupied by the construct and what ifs
You have experienced thus before, what did you do about it? Did you see the GP, how did it resolve

I used to do this all the time, take a shine to a caring stranger and think about them for months. This has dwindled a bit as I've got older. I don't act on any of it, I'm just aware that my daydreams are a little pink bubble in the everyday dullness of life.
I also have daydreams that are completely based on fiction.
I think, OP that as long as you recognise that this IS a fantasy and don't do anything to try to make it reality, you'll be fine. She was nice to you at a time of crisis so you developed a slight crush. No harm in a daydream as long as it's not impacting your life and you have no intention of finding her irl on online.