Overheard colleague talking about me

[user9870099]

I overheard a colleague talking about me today with some other members of the team saying she doesn't trust me and has hated me since the day I started.
I can't think of anything I have ever done to upset her, I just go in and get on with my work.
I was bullied when I was younger so this has bought a lot of memories back.

This says much more about her than you OP.
Continue going about your work, you don't need her approval to be yourself.

She sounds like a cow. The others probably think she is a cow too, but don't want to speak up in case she starts being a cow to them as well.

I'm sorry it's making you feel bad and bringing up some bad memories. Do you get on with others in the team?

Ugh. Awful behaviour. I'm sorry if this causes anxiety. This person does not define your worth and it says a lot more about them. Be friendly but keep your distance. I'd never initiate a conversation and would make sure I stay as far away as I could. Sending hugs OP x

She feels threatened by you in some way - she thinks you can do your job better than her, quicker than her and she'll get shown up, she's worried the others will like you better than her and she'll no longer be centre of attention, if you're all young and single she's worried that the men in the office will fancy you more than her, she's worried that Dave in Accounts who she's secretly fancied for months will ask you out instead, she's worried if there are redundancies they'll decide to keep her over you, for some reason you are a threat.....

Do you work in a care home? God, those places can get nasty.

I know it can hurt especially if you suffered being bullied when younger but screw her, so what, let he get on with it, she’s no significance to you and your life. I wouldn’t give her a second thought, she isn’t worth it and you’re not paid enough to worry about what she thinks about you. It says more about you than her.

100% threatened by you. Don't take it to heart, this is all about her bit personally, I wouldn't even be friendly and I'd be very cold towards her and focus on building relationships with your other colleagues.

They were probably very uncomfortable at her comments. I know I would have been. That sort of nasty talk doesn't make anyone feel 'safe' so chances are they now don't trust or like her.

She can sense your weakness and is taking this as an opportunity to assert her dominance in the group.

You have to try and ignore her and rise above it but it’s hard because she will take other opportunities to have a little dig at you. I’m in the same situation in a non-work group. My advice is to make friends with at least one other person so you have a good ally.

Just smile at her every time you see her, wind her up even more.

Says more about her than you.

Not being nasty, but the assertive thing to do here is to say something like
"X, I accidentally overheard your conversation with Y. Is there anything you'd like to say to me in person?"

Bullies (if this person is one) can't cope with being stood up to,
And if it was something else, they'd be happy to explain.

If it actually is they genuinely can't stand you, then you can agree a workable way forward together