Sick of crap house layouts

[Naptrappedmummy]

A moan thread but probably deserves to be on AIBU…

Looking to buy, 2 kids (boy/girl) so need 3 bedrooms. Every single house without fail either has 2 bedrooms plus a room so tiny you can’t fit a bed and wardrobe comfortably in it, or they’re 4 beds and slightly out of our price range.

Add to that rubbish uphill tiered gardens where you’ll trip and nearly break your neck every 5 minutes, a lack of storage in almost every house (no utility rooms, cupboards, pantries or porches), and just absurd layouts in general which make no use of the space they have and are completely counterintuitive.

All I want is an actual 3 bed with some storage, an ordinary downstairs layout and a flat garden capable of holding a swing and some chairs. Why can’t I have it????

My other bugbear is when the house is ‘detached’ - by about 30cm. May as well be semi/terraced, get an extra foot of width and share heat. It’s ridiculous. We don’t have loads of stuff but need somewhere to put Christmas decorations, our tent, and a few of the kids things, plus somehow downstairs for the hoover and mop. I saw a 3 bed earlier that wasn’t even a 3 bed - the third ‘bedroom’ was a cubby off the master bedroom, 1m by 2m, and didn’t have a door, just 50cm or so of partition wall and a big gap. It’s crazy!

@AntonFeckoff that is def the case for many in the south east- my son has worked out a 2 bed SO will cost around£1570 at the moment- he currently pays £2200 rent (nice bit of London) and most certainly wouldn't ever save enough to buy on standard market and he wants to stay ideally in London or London edges for work reasons - I think the thing with SO is get one in the best area you possibly can - some are far better than others.

The problem is that most people are complaining about the housing stock.

What they are really complaining about is they can't buy what they want for the money they have.

Bungalows tend to be higher priced. They tend to be on larger plots and often offer less space for the money (but more garden). So they don't really represent a good value solution to people getting what they want, especially when often you are competing to buy them against older people that often have more money.

You should see what my fuckwit neighbour just got planning for. Turning a two bedroom bung in a tiny plot, with a small extension, into two three bedroom bungs! One just about double, two singles, no storage. One bathroom, open plan kitchen living. He has met the minimum sizes for each room. It's awful that space like that is acceptable.

I hope it works out for your son. There's more protection in place for shared owners now, too, like allowances for repairs. A lot of people on here turn their noses up at SO but many of us don't have a choice, so we do the best with what we can.

Unfortunately there's not an awful lot on the market where I am at the moment. Plenty of 2-4 bedroom houses going up in the middle of nowhere but very few 1-2 bedroom affordable flats anywhere near town or city centres. A luxurious development went up in my city a couple of years ago and for some reason they've made a sizeable portion of it SO, presumably as it wouldn't have got permission to be built without 'affordable' options otherwise. Their 1 beds start at £450k full market value, which even for this area is laughable. No wonder they aren't shifting them.

I hear a lot of complaints from people about how these blocks of flats are going up and sitting empty so there's obviously no need for them... err, no, it's that even people who are desperate for a home can't afford them!

Isn’t this just a case of not affording what we want?
When I moved to my first house after a series of flats, I could only afford the type of house the OP is describing. Only when I earned more did I get to trade up.
I would also love to work and live in central London. I’m thinking Chelsea or Marylebone would be lovely and would save me having to commute to work. Sadly I can’t afford it so am destined to live in the suburbs. I’m only joking of course but you get my point.
But that’s life! Full of compromises.

I don’t think it’s a budget thing because even if I remove the budget limitations, the 3 beds are still as I describe, just with fancier gardens or a massive kitchen. They still have a tiny third bedroom, not much storage and probably one or two other issues.

That is just shit UK architecture for you. Double taps, windows that don't open and layouts so bad that they make you want to cry. I never in my life saw so many badly designed houses as when we were house hunting, with cupboards beign advertised as double bedrooms etc. that plus horrific prices... I think unless you build yourself, you are going to be looking for a long while for something decent.

Yes you might share the heat, but you also share the noise.

If you have never had noisy neighbours then you wouldn't appreciate how much difference having a detached house makes even if it is only 30cm.

Had a look locally what's around and I think this is the kind of layout OP is probably after - proper 3 beds - but roomy generally - I do agree it's not that easy to find but they are out there. The best ones are often 2 beds that have done good loft conversions and also extended downstairs. Have you actually put 2 bedders into your search OP- once found a rented house that we let advertised as a 2 bedder but also had a downstairs dining room as well as a large lounge and a great garage conversion

www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/142993148

Don't look at new builds

All the ones near me have no room for ironing boards (I use one!), hoovers, coats, shoes, more than two dresses or any cooking gadgets (and definitely no books!)

They're ridiculous

Not always... I had a semi detached and had the unfortunate issue of having the drains run down the drive and the main access/connection was in the back garden... Would have probably cost far more to alter the drains than the side extension would have cost... Even with a build over agreement, the length of the drains meant it was too risky.

yes I second this. I have almost given up looking for a 3 bed flat as most have a tiny third bedroom. Thinking of moving to a larger 2 bed approximately 75 sq metres instead but i already have a small 2 bed so seems quite wasteful!

there are lots of large 2 bed flats but no 3 beds with large bedrooms. Those that exist are more expensive than a house. I am buying a bigger flat because i don't want to spend money on property in a housing crisis yet i cannot wait a lifetime for the government to solve this housing crisis so have to somehow get on with my life.

I own a small 2 bed flat (which we bought when we were a young couple in our 20s in our first jobs) and would like some more space but don't want to pay th house premium (and want to stay in London near work and family).

The new builds near me are riddled with en suite bathrooms. Two bathrooms and a downstairs loo in a 3-bed house, so the third bedroom is tiny. Baffles me every time.

What they are really complaining about is they can't buy what they want for the money they have.

I agree, OP you seem to be complaining about everything, moaning about detached houses not being detached enough but you don’t want a terrace as they don’t have parking, if you want a large detached house in its own plot with a flat garden and driveway parking you will just have to increase your budget or look at a cheaper location.

I hate an en suite. Would never have one. If I we ever moved and bought a place with one, it would first thing to be gone! I just can’t imagine how it doesn’t feel like taking a crap in the bedroom 😂

We live in a village with no newer builds, but also very little on street parking which is frustrating. We bought a terrace with a front garden that we made into a driveway; would that be an option?

When DSiS was looking for her new build, she had a massive budget for the area and a decent range of villages with lots of developments to choose from, yet the layouts were odd. All open plan too, which sounds nice in theory, but with children planned all she wanted was a play/family room for all the toys to live in.

YANBU

We’re not talking about the typical box room that I grew up with, that fit a single bed and wardrobe. I could live with that. The three bed houses around here have the third bedroom so small that they literally don’t fit a single bed in them!

Some beautiful new builds near us. Gorgeous big bedrooms. Lovely downstairs space. But they've gone for garages and not office space 🙄

@AntonFeckoff This drives me insane. My DC are starting to looking at SO properties and the vast majority of flats with just one living area and virtually no storage but sky high prices.

Who wants a kitchen right behind a sofa. The noise alone would drive me insane. Washing machines are not as quiet as they are made out to be.

We're in a SO house. I think the people who are very anti don't know the protections there are in place now (such as the 990 year lease and allowance for repairs etc).

Our house was never meant to be SO, but the developer couldn't sell it post-Truss, so the HA bought a load from them to shift on to the likes of us. It's a style and spec not usually offered to SO (and ours is the ex-show home, so we got it with carpet / Amtico / vinyl for bathrooms throughout). The developer of the apartments you mention may have done similar (there were always SO on the development, but it wasn't intended for there to be so many).

When we were looking a couple of years ago, we found that the 4 bed houses were almost as useless as the 3 bed ones. They usually had 2 double bedrooms, and 2 tiny bedrooms. You’d have to knock the 2 small ones together to get 3 decent bedrooms! But at that point you’re massively devaluing your house, and paying a huge amount of money to do so.

We ended up with a 1950s 3-bed semi, and I’m pretty happy with it. 1 big double, 1 ok double, and 1 good single (you could fit a double bed in if needed). And it has a good hallway! So plenty of space for shoes & coats. Downstairs loo, & a separate kitchen (I loathe open plan).
The 1930s ones round here have the tiny box room; the 1950s ones have a more usable 3rd bedroom.

Modern houses are rubbish. They also put no thought into the layout. For example instead of house layouts being e.g stairs/hall/bathroom against the party wall to minimise noise they put bedrooms against bedrooms or living rooms against living rooms which can cause problems especially if one side decides to do something shite like mount a telly or speaker on the party wall.

@Thriwit yes I’m contemplating buying a 4 bed and knocking 2 of the bedrooms through (we are viewing one on Friday). Hallways are also very underrated. Ours is really narrow, you have to squeeze past all the coats hanging up to get through!