Should I tell the school about this?

[AutismMum21]

My son is 7 and has autism. There was a serious incident today which could have very easily turned into a bad injury or even fatal.

He is known for bolting but there’s never been anything really awful happen, but today we was at a shopping centre near the entrance and before I had a chance to sort the bags and grab hold of him, he ran straight off and into the road outside causing a car to have to emergency break and screech across the road to avoid hitting him.

Obviously I am really shaken up by this and I don’t know if it’ll happen again, I’ve spoken to him about the consequences of what could have happened but he mainly understands things through visuals.

School are the ones who make these visuals for us but I feel like they also need to know because they go on outings regularly and it’s something for them to be aware of to maybe keep an adult with him at all times or a closer eye on him when out where they maybe wouldn’t have before BUT I’m really worried that they might raise it as a safeguarding issue because this happened today?

AIBU? I’ve had a few issues with the school (nothing safeguarding or anything like that) and I think that’s maybe clouding my judgement or making me overthink when it’s not needed

Yes, please raise it, especially if it becomes more frequent an issue. They will likely need to risk assess for him individually.

Yes definitely raise it. Is he at mainstream school?

It’s a good idea to share this with anyone who is responsible for caring for your son, as then they can plan and prepare better to avoid a repeat.

Sharing it in a - this happened, here’s what I’m putting in place to avoid a repeat, when you take him out then x, y, z is a really positive move and shows you are actively safeguarding him.

He is at an SEN school, I’m just worried they are going to think I wasn’t watching him properly when that’s not the case at all - you could keep eyes on him 24/7 and he would still find a way to bolt if he wanted to but obviously his safety trumps everything and I know if I don’t mention it I’ll constantly worry when they are out at school

Useful to let them know but also could you use a wristband connected to you in some way so he doesn’t have to hold your hand but is safe while you’re using your hands? This is what my friend used for her son who was similar. He’s at secondary now and grew out of bolting late primary.

That’s a great way of putting it thank you! The visuals I think might help as he responds well to them - I’ll have a look at the wristbands because obviously he is way too old for reins and things like that and he can walk perfectly fine so doesn’t need a ‘buggy’ sort of thing

Let school know, they may log it in their safeguarding system but not to cause problems just because it’s what is done.

you can get harnesses/wrist straps for older children that may be useful. Or if you have to take him shopping or similar can you use a SN buggy to keep him safe?

make sure you take some time to look after yourself too after such a fright

A SEN school will absolutely not think you weren't watching him properly so don't worry about that.

Please tell them: an SEN school will be used to this sort of thing. Crucially, telling them - & getting a wrist link of some kind - is safeguarding your DS, which they will recognise.

I’m really glad your DS is ok - I hope you’ve recovered from the shock of it.

I'm a retired special school teacher. We wouldn't have felt that you'd done anything wrong at all. We were only too familiar with children who bolt

We went out on trips regularly (giving children the life skills of going to shops and so on was an integral part of our curriculum and we had several minibuses to facilitate it) and we had well practised management plans for specific children's behaviours. They were part of our risk assessment for every trip we planned.

I would absolutely want you to let me know so that we could be aware of the specific risk and ensure that it was part of our RA.
We had wrist straps for some children, and named TA and child responsibilities confirmed before we left school.

Safeguarding can be about protecting a child from their own behaviour. The fact that your son is 7 and this is his first near miss speaks volumes of your care and attention to him. The schools needs to know so then can safeguard him from his own behaviour.

Yes tell the school. And investigate a weighted back pack. Max 10% of body weight I think. It can help the child to know where they are in open spaces - speak to an OT for further information

You must tell them.