To hate weekend mornings/days

[Moanalot2]

Literally every weekend day, DH gets up, goes downstairs and lounges around on the sofa falling asleep until we decide to do something. It annoys me so bad as i am running around doing breakfast, sorting clothes out etc. He tells me this is what everybody does on a weekend morning. I like Mon-Fri as he has to go to work so I dont have to witness it but my god I have never seen the guy rush, if he was any more laid back he would fall over. It really angers me looking at him snoring to the point my blood is boiling and I dont understand why it gets me like this, obviously he think IABU.

So he's selfish, lazy and now overweight. I bet you can't wait to jump the man come bed time. It's really not ok to lie around while one person does everything for the kids. I find it much easier as a single parent - no seething resentment.

Throw him out, he sounds useless

I just needed to know it wasn't just me. He has been out 3 nights this week, including last night but that isnt the point, I find it pointless him being here when he is here as I do everything. I am so sick of saying can you get up and help me. The kitchen cupboard door has been hanging off now for 3 weeks, I have tried multiple times to put it back myself and he just is not bothered about anything, then says to me why dont you look at me and say aww and come and give me a cuddle instead of moaning!

I know the kitchen door is a not a big deal by all means but you get my drift

It is actually this simple. I wish younger me knew this!

Ok fair enough it's different if he is sitting there and learning everything to you rather than just chilling out with the dc but still parenting.
Just tell him exactly what you have said here.

Tell him your life would be easier if he moves out and has the kids all weekend. And you get CSA too/rest time

I would spend the next couple of weekends getting up and out the house with the kids and having a lovely time. And then tell your partner how much happier you are without him and kick him out!

I love my life now it’s just me and my son as his dad was very much like yours!

He's sleeping a lot more than usual and putting on weight? Has he been checked for diabetes? Also, sleep apnoea could be causing a problem with inefficient sleep at night. Get these checked out before condemning the poor guy to the trash heap!

I am honestly convinced he has sleep Apnoea, he stops breathing in his sleep and then gasps for air. can you buy a machine to help?

You are raising a third child.

Leave him and be happy.

I am going to look into the sleep Apnoea thing first

My parents used to wake up on weekends at 12, although my dad did nights
I wanted them to wake early, have a relaxed time and family breakfast but fully dressed and sharp and alert, not having the morning shower at 4pm Is this what you mean

This would absolutely repulse me. Put him in the bin, you are basically a single parent anyway.

he tells me everyone does this ..

But you don't - ask who does he mean by everyone?

Ive made him an appointment as he wont do it himself.

Shove DC into the same room as him and go out to get your nails hair done

At the start of your post, I was thinking you were expecting you both to rush around doing housework and admin and getting everyone up and out for a brisk walk or a weekly food shop by 8am or something, and that I was going to think YABU... but it actually just sounds like you're literally just expecting him to share the normal stuff any parent of small children has to do in the morning, in which case YANBU at all. As you say - it's not like you have any choice about stuff like giving your kids breakfast, wiping bums etc. I'm not saying he (or you!) should be at your peak of productivity on a Sunday morning but there's a bare minimum a parent of a five year old and a toddler needs to do every day, and he's not even managing that. I would be annoyed by this too. I'm pretty laid-back and I'm not a morning person, but I'd accept that if I had kids I'd obviously need to get up and deal with them - even if it was just making them toast, getting their teeth brushed and then letting them play in their pyjamas! So yes, he needs to step up.

He needs to at least try to investigate potential medical problems as it's not normal for a healthy adult to fall asleep like that.

I am not exaggerating here, as soon as he closes his eyes he can be snoring, like within seconds, its quite impressive!

When our DC were babies I literally couldnt trust him to not fall asleep with them. I did all the night waking's, I was BF anyway but I felt so isolated. He just said he could not wake up and we had to play to our strengths.

The thing is though, if he goes on a night out, he manages to stay awake until 5am with his friends. I could not do that and I dont have sleep issues!

Well, if he doesn't see the kids because he works late then thats a pretty good reason for not seeing them?????

You sound like you're looking for excuses, sorry. Split some jobs to make it easier but the tiredness of 3 days is way less than 5 full days and some lates. You might just have to chill out a bit.

Ahhh you should have started with this. Give him jobs.

@Moanalot2 What I don't get is why have 2 children with someone who has been like this for as long as you have known him? Snoring as soon as his head is down? What has changed in you? I cannot see any changes in him?