My friends and my name!

[Nameoe]

Honestly need to know if this would annoy anyone else?
I can't say my real name, it is very uncommon and outing but for example let's say my name is Izabel spelt with a z.
All of my friends will write Isabel when speaking to me. My name is uncommon and I would have no doubt spelt it out when we exchanged numbers etc years ago, I am on their social media too.
They constantly write Isabel instead of Izabel!
I have corrected them in the past but nothing changes, it can't even be autocorrect because my name is so uncommon.
It sounds stupid but it makes me feel so insignificant to them that they can't even be bothered to spell my name correctly.
Would this annoy anyone else or am I unreasonable here?

Dying to know what her name is?! Did you not come across it with other people and question why it was spelt that way? Also how did you find out you were spelling it wrong? So many questions!

Oh it wassss pheobe! It’s late…I read that as a separate comment haaaa. Yes it’s a difficult one to remember- like Phoenix. Feels like it should be the other way round 😅

Yep, I have an uncommon name that 99% of people get wrong both in spelling and pronunciation as it's similar to a common name. It really pisses me off when both my email address (my name), plus my signature at the end is right there in front of them, then they reply with the wrong fucking name. When people call me the wrong name, I do correct them, but some of them don't seem to understand that my name is different to the name they are saying or writing. Honestly, I find it so rude.

Because I've had this my whole life, I always make a point of making sure I get people's names, spelling and pronunciation correct. It also really irks me when people keep writing "Claire's Law". It's so disrespectful, when her name was spelt Clare, so Clare's Law.

🤣🤣🤣

TBH if it's one of the letters in the middle of my name I don't really mind. For some reason I hate when they use the wrong first letter. (it could be one of 2).
I never even type people's names really when I'm texting them. I don't understand why all of them keep doing it when you keep telling them the right spelling though. Do you think they are trying to do a gentle wind up?

This used to happen to me regularly at work. Every time I replied to someone who had mis spelled my name, I deliberately mis spelled theirs. I tried to be fairly creative about it and it was a bit of entertainment on a dull day. Very few people made the mistake next time they emailed me,

Yeah I get similar. In my case it's a shortening that is completely different to my actual name and is a horrible old lady name.

Even more annoying is my auntie who calls me by a boys name which literally nobody else has ever used. She does it both verbaĺly and on birthday cards etc. She's known me and my name since I was born!

yanbu. My daughter has a name that’s not unusual but can be spelt 4 different ways and even my family (daughter’s grandmother) spells it wrong. Not In birthday cards etc but over text, which is more than likely autocorrect but I find it quite hurtful they don’t make the effort to spell it correctly.

My Mum (who sadly died a few year ago ) and my sister have never spelt our surname correctly. It’s very simple but has an extra L . I really haven’t got too worked up about it!

I found it very rude when I had a boss (nightmare, but that’s a whole other thread) who could not be bothered to spell my last name (not common but fairly simple phonetically although there could be a few variants) correctly when hers was a East European name which would not be that obvious to British ears but I had learned the spelling before I started working with her!

As you can see from this thread you are not alone. I have an uncommon name and to top it off, there are about 5 different spellings of which my version is the very least common - google has found 2 others in the world with my name! To me it's about respect. If someone that is more than just a fleeting moment in my life cannot be bothered to not only learn how to spell my name but also pronounce it (i've heard all sort of random letters thrown in) they do not respect me. So that's how they want to be treated by me.

And don't get me started on emails where it's right in front of them no less than 4 times and they still get it wrong!

My name is constantly misspelled and mispronounced. It's Welsh. Let's say it's Eleri. I get Elerie, Ellery, Ellerie, Ellie etc.

Most of my friends spell it correctly though. A few do mispronounce it but all my good friends get both spelling and pronunciation right.

Maybe because of my own name I've never struggled to remember who is Catherine and who is Kathryn, or Claire and Clare etc.

Although lots of people do seem to struggle (looking at some of DH's family and friends who still mispronounce and misspell my name, 17 years after we got together).

I have an unusual name and so does my daughter. Both are regularly misspelled by friends, family and others as well. Neither of us care. We get a giggle at the variants.
Like I say, not a hill to die on. Think some of you are being very grave and egotistical about an easy mistake to make that has no actual impact or personal reflection on you at all.
Bet you've even misspelled someone's name yourself.
Chill.

I live in an old textiles village. The main mill is still here - it's called "Pheonox" mill, a historical misspelling.

My surname is Irish and has lots of superfluous vowels. It's fairly unusual, and is the most unusual way of spelling it. People at work still spell it wrong, to the exetent that they'll tell me my email address isn't working, they couldn't dive me in the Outlook address book, and they're glad I've got in touch.... FFS. I've worked there nearly 20 years!

@Kw1234hhggf how do you pronounce Katy? Is it different to Katie as I too would assume they sound the same

That would piss me off just say' my name is spelt this way '. ' every time they do it wrong
I've had to do it for my child at school and that pisses me
Off like you say makes me feel she's insignificant

Surely this is an autocorrect issue most of the time?

I have the same problem except my name is commonly spelt 2 ways with an extra letter and without, and people constantly spell my name with the extra letter even when they are emailing me - it’s so rude, it really winds me up and if I were my friends doing it I would tell them nicely but firmly

My closest friend of 15 years once spelt my name wrong on a Christmas card. We are no longer friends and while that isn't the reason it was yet another example of how uninterested she was.

I think this:

50% of people will be very detail oriented. They will take note of the spelling. Details are important to them and missing them will annoy them.

50% are big picture thinkers and details like this get lost.

Along the way people find ways to manage the issues that come up but sort of always default to their way of being.

So, I can see why it annoys you but I doubt it’s in any way personal.

The only thing you can do now is get one letter in the perpetrators’ names wrong, every single time. And watch them bristle.

Yes it's rude

My name can be spelt 3 ways - my way. Without an E or without an i

and often I get the i left out

Does annoy me

I really wish parents would use the traditional spellings of names.
Yes I know different countries have different spellings, I don’t mean that.
I’m talking parents naming their child Wensday for example. I’ve come across this.
However, I do make a point of remembering which spelling of a name my friends are. This includes Clare, Tracey, Gary, etc.
Regarding emails, how difficult is that? Just read the email.
When my mum retired from work after working there for 30 years, they spelt her name wrong. There are only 2 spellings of the name and they couldn’t even get the inscription correct.

I get this too. I have an extra letter in my name. People reply to me online with the spelling right there in front of them but still spell it the "correct" way. It drives me crazy. It's so rude!

I was on the panel for shortlisting and interviewing for a high level job recently. One candidate did himself no favours in spelling our panel leader's name wrong in his email greetings (turning it into an entirely different name) when it was there in her signature and email address, and even after she'd corrected him the first time!
it made us look further into his eye for detail etc, and basically cost him the job.