Danger or overreaction

[Thoughtswelcomehere]

At a monkey temple in Asia .
prior to leaving had agreed with DH not to get too near moneys due to Heb B/ rabies risk.

not to near means approx within a meter.

DH gets carried away with the hype ,
watches another person poke a monkey and then states the monkey was fine and tells our child to go up to it.

I dont Want them to.

Dh starts getting arsey as he ‘ has my own opinion ‘ ‘ it’s fine, I’ve made my own judgement’

discussion about monkeys being unpredictable and wild and possibly pissed off after being poked.

has no impact

child near monkey.

different monkey later jumps on child and tries to scratch at them and takes there water.

DH laughs.

I am concerned about possible broken skin.

DH says it’s ‘ too much, other families would just laugh’ ‘ why are you so angry’

Thoughts

We didn’t poke it

So the monkey that actually jumped on your child was not the one from the first discussion?

Was your child close to this monkey?

Honestly, the whole this sound dumb, you think the monkeys magically leave you alone if you are a meter away from them?

This! ^

This! ^

I have no sympathy for either of you if you think it's acceptable 'entertainment' to poke any animal.

I take it this is one of these temples where they feed monkeys in order to attract them for the tourists, rather than an organised experience with healthy, captive monkeys?

This is one of those places where the monkeys just live there in roam free right? I think they're used to people being around but if you don't want to be close to monkeys then don't go someplace like that.

that was big of you

I'd have been livid, too, OP.
Rabies is not to be 'risked' for obvious reasons.

I agree with people that if this is a place where the monkeys are roaming free then standing a metre away isn't going to be any guarantee of them not approaching you or your child.

Were there any signs up or anyone warning visitors not to approach/touch the monkeys? No one should've been poking them or winding them up certainly but it wasn't the "poked monkey" who approached your child - it was another one that was just being a monkey and likely could've done the same even if your child was further away.

If being around wild animals is that big a concern for you then perhaps select a different holiday activity?

exactly

and
presumably you would have removed your child from the situation?

not the op it would seem

Poking monkeys isnt very kind! Sounds like it needs to be toned down a bit.Respect for all creatures surely

I think you shouldn't have gone. Honestly not trying to be mean but i feel like this was always gonna happen. People don't normally go to these thing to not join in. I'm not saying anyone is wrong, you or him. I just don't think this day out was for you

You both put your child in danger by going to such a place tbh. Monkeys are fast animals, staying one metre away isn't going to achieve anything tbh, if a monkey wanted to get to you it would just jump as it did.

It sounds like a bigger issue than the monkey. But, if you don't want to risk your kids being near wild animals you shouldn't really take them to places like that as it is almost inevitable that they will get close. It's not like a zoo, those monkeys are wild and very very bold when stealing food/drink from tourists. That's the whole reason why they live in/ around the temple.

Where the hell did you go????

This in spades!

Your DH sounds like a massive dickhead by telling your child to touch the monkeys, but not because of any danger to your child - just because winding up wild animals is a cunt’s move and he shouldn’t be encouraging your child to behave like that.

You are being ridiculous for thinking that a) you could go to a monkey temple and avoid contact with monkeys and b) for stressing about a monkey taking a harmless swipe at your kid. ‘Stay a metre away’ - LOL. You and your husband know what a metre is, but here’s the thing: the monkey doesn’t. If a monkey wants to touch you, it will. They’re not going to observe social distancing.

The monkeys, in fact, are far more at risk in these situations than the tourists. Loads of human diseases can affect other primates and it’s not good for monkeys to be encouraged to hang out in busy places and for them to get fed with crap by tourists.

YANBU. Monkeys are wild animals it's not a bloody guinea pig. Also I'd have had a right go at someone if I saw them poking a monkey. Poor thing.

You're husband is a wreckless twat.

My ex was like this. My safety concerns were always disregarded as fun killing. He minimised all risk. Which of course made me even more concerned about safety when our children were little.

Some really shit things did happen too. Including an ambulance ride to a&e when he left the brakes off our 1 year olds buggy on a slope. Thankfully she was OK, but it could've very easily been a different story.

It was a type gaslighting I think, in my situation. "Oh you're so stressy", "you've got attachment issues", ""you're controlling". When actually i was trying to parent responsibly & keep our children safe.

Still gives me the rage. I should've trusted myself and I suggest you do too.

Hmm.

I'm in two minds. I have been to temples where wild monkeys live and they go where they damn well want. They tend to swarm around the food vans and the bins for obvious reasons.

However staying a metre away from them is going to make no difference if they decide to jump on/hassle your kid as they move really fast.

Personally I didn't like them (I'm not keen on wild animals generally - too unpredictable) but I found if you stayed away from the food vans and bins and with reasonable numbers of people they stayed away from you.

Your DH sounds a muppet though, poking them or being around someone who is poking them is asking for trouble.

I don't know where the OP went but most of the ruined temples in Cambodia (Angkor Wat) have lots of monkeys because they were basically abandoned and completely overgrown with jungle before being discovered and opened up for tourists.

If you were concerned about rabies and hep b, you really shouldn't have taken them to a tourist temple where they Argentine and yet continually under stress by stupid tourists. They can jump much more than a meter, so your distance rule was silly in the first place. Your husband taking a child beside one was silly to, so basically you were both daft, to go in the first place

I think your DH is an adult and can carry out his own risk assessment. I would hate DH telling me what to do.

your thread title should be reworded to

Dangerous AND underreaction