My sisters has been telling me that's it's totally unacceptable that I'm not planning to see my mum for Mother's Day, AIBU?
I live 1hr 40 from home and have my own toddler. I didn't go back last year and my mum totally understood and said it's our day now that we're mum's too. She saw my 2 DS who live right by her and their kids. She's always been a single mum over my life and it makes her so happy I have a happy family unit if my own.
My mum mentally isn't coping with life at the moment, she's physically unwell, hasn't worked for many years and is having counseling for issues from her past. I am supporting her as much as I can with messages and phone calls. We are her only support, she doesn't have any good friends but has started spending time with one of her neighbors recently.
I am going home with DC for 6 days at the end of the month, so would have spent lots of time with her less than 2 weeks before Mother's Day. Its not cheap to spend the fuel to go over and DH has bouts of travelling a lot for work, so we enjoy family weekends when he's home and I'll usually go to see my family for a few days when he's away.
Going home just for Mother's Day will use my fuel money for a proper trip home at the end of March or start if April.
Our other DS is planning to see our mum on the day. Other DS who's angry with me has a party in the middle of the day, she's feeling guilty about that as she thinks we're all obligated to have the day with our mum. She said I'm selfish because she sees my mum most weekends and we shouldn't have our own family mothers days.
To not drop feed my DH wouldn't want to all go over as a family because he has issues with other DS that's for a other day, plus we have a dog and that's a lot of travel in one day for her.