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For saying I liked the 'me time'

5 replies

Higgldy · 08/02/2024 05:16

Last night DH told me that he's going to the pub tomorrow night to watch a match. I said of course and in fact to take his time because I love having these nights in by myself, putting the kids to bed then watching my shows ok the big TV with a cup of tea.

Dh seemed offended. He isn't usually over sensitive or insecure. I said I hadn't meant it in a bad way, just that I don't get any time alone at all (I don't get a second- work full time in a full on job and have 3 kids). It's not like him to be touchy or anything but I thought my POV was fairly normal?

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Am I being unreasonable?

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You are being unreasonable
You are NOT being unreasonable
coffy11 · 08/02/2024 05:20

Weird reaction from your dh. I love my alone time, doesn't happen nearly often enough. When the kids were little, I would get dh to take the kids to his mums for a visit once a year so that I could have a few days alone time.

SilverBranchGoldenPears · 08/02/2024 05:21

I’ve said the same to my DH. His reaction is the odd thing.

KT8282 · 08/02/2024 05:21

Absolutely normal! Alone time with the tv sounds wonderful to me (currently unobtainable). Tell him not to be such a melon and enjoy his time out.

Noideawwhatsoccuring · 08/02/2024 05:33

I live alone time. My dad is the same. My mum hated it. She would get offended by it.

My ex husband hated that enjoyed my time without him there. Despite as he was self employed he got tons of alone time while I was out at work and enjoyed it. He really took it personally that I enjoyed alone time.

I known a couple of women that didn’t seem to like that their husbands were happy for them to go out, while the husbands had the kids, put them to bed and have the evening to themselves.

Personally, I think it’s an odd reaction. But not uncommon, in my experience.

You didn’t do anything wrong. His reaction is about himself and how he is feeling. Maybe he is feeling a bit insecure in the relationship. How I would deal with it depends on how good the relationship is generally.

Higgldy · 08/02/2024 05:36

He isn't normally insecure and is all for me going and getting away from the kids with a coffee or meeting friends. In fact, a few months ago he made me promise him I'll do more stuff for myself! Maybe its the way I worded it. He was v tired last night too.

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