Whoooo I'm just here venting I feel like my feelings are valid and I'm not asking for too much. But to start I've been with my boyfriend 2 years. I don't ask him for anything but to do the dishes/clean the kitchen occasional dates and flowers. Just something anything to feel appreciated.
I say appreciated because we don't do anything in the whole 2 years. But sit around look at tv have and have sex. I do so much and I have so many responsibilities but I pay all the bills and 75% of the cleaning cook all the meals etc. I don't feel this relationship is 50/50.
I don't feel like I'm asking for too much but when I say to him I feel old. I wanna go out I wanna do something romantic but every time he brings up why. "I'm tired" "I'm trying" and those words are ok. But when I finally asked him for help with 1 billion he complained about his check being short and asked if he could help at a later date and then turned around a purchased weed.
And I have been bringing up the dates and flowers for a year. A YEAR! and it may seem like I'm being unreasonable but he gets money and does what he wants and then I get upset because I'm telling you I want a little more. I'm exhausted from taking on all the responsibilities. And I also have 3 children so I'm stretched thin.
Then it's as if he makes me feel guilty by saying. He's in pain from work , he doesn't have much money. I don't either but if he asks for something he gets it. I feel fucking guilty for asking for the bare minimum. It's times his boss will call him in to work and he declines. He doesnt work 5 days a week. I get it people get tired. But now it's seeming lazy to me and because he's going through all of these things I need to be more reasonable.
I work 5 days a week I'm up Monday- Friday at 5 am and I don't hit the bed until after 10 pm. I work from 7-4. I have to cook I have to clean I have to grocery shop I have to help with homework and spending quality time. I'm so exhausted but I still give. Love , affection, time etc. but he expects me to just deal with what he's doing. He wants to take me out he wants to buy flowers but I've been hearing this for a year. He upset that I ask for flowers but every time he wants to get out the "dog house " he's quick to buy flowers. And in these 2 years it's only been 2x.
I feel like I'm not the woman he wants to do those things for. When I have sat here and gave my all. Worked myself tirelessly showing what type of woman I am. And this is what I get.