I posted back in January regarding an issue with my husband's side of the family.
Sadly, I found out that he has posted something online which claims that I am the problem, I am very picky not his family i.e. parents and brother and wife. I am in shock and speechless. I feel sick to my stomach.
I realized I will never be on the same wavelength as his family and they will always be the good ones and I will always be the bad and second one. Is it wrong because I tried to create a relationship with people who never cared to ask me the most basic question? Do I have a right to be annoyed and no longer be willing to put in an effort to see his family? I must be really the problem here and stupid not to acknowledge it, right and they are just fine.
I must be crazy because I must be missing something.
After heated argument with my husband few days ago I said that I will divorce him (yes, I shouldn't of have said that). I just don't know anymore how to be "part" of a family moving forward who have no interest in me or my life. He is so close with his family and of course, how am I supposed to be part of this when people have zero interest in getting to know me? It has always been them talking about themselves. I will ask questions, my questions will be answered, and they will move onto talking about them and my sister in law family. Sadly, up to this day they don't know 2% about me as a person. They do not know the most basic things about me as a person who is meant to be part of this family.
Myself and my husband are meant to move to another country and we were discussing how it will be when his brother and wife come. I mentioned that it will be a strange feeling. I will not feel comfortable in my own home to have them, BUT for the reason that we do not have any relationship whatsoever. And for the other reasons that they do not know me as a person, they never cared to get to know me. He said if they are not allowed to come my sister will not be allowed to come. I do not have anything against family and friends visiting us, hosting them etc, BUT he does not understand the reason that we do not have a relationship.
My sister in law has refused every coffee offer that I have asked her. They live 5min away and how are we supposed to build relationships?
I just don't know what to do anymore. I care because every time we have to hangout with them I always get the anxious feeling and hate having to hangout with them because of the zero relationship part and trying to establish one.
My heart hurts because I made a massive mistake in my life and now I am paying for it by suffering and my own husband not seeing how hurt I am. Spending my days feeling miserable, crying, no family or friends nearby me, nobody. I feel like I am dying on the inside and I do not want to spend the rest of my life in such a marriage. I started seriously thinking about divorce. I do not want to go through divorce after a few months of being married, but I do not not know how to tackle the situation anymore. Just to mention that we do not have kids. And after all of the series of events, I started to convince myself I should not have any kids and my kids having to watch me suffer if nothing changes.
How long is too long to give a family chances or hoping that one day it will be better and change?