To wonder where they bloody are?!

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My DH gran passed away about 6 years ago and I dont recall anything happening to her ashes? I find it so completely bizarre that they just wouldn't do anything with them?

At least my dad isn't alone in this! Hopefully your not my sil as I changed some of the relatives /pets about

I find this really strange. A colleague was upset once because she had no where to go to 'visit' her brother as his wife still had his ashes and they didn't get on that well.
This kind of scenario must happen a lot.

So what happens to the ashes when your brother passes on? And the rest of the family?

I know quite a few people who keep shoeboxes of ashes in their wardrobes, what else are you supposed to do with them?

My parents have told me to just not collect them from the morgue once you die that’s it, there is no point in making a shrine.

Plenty of people want nothing to do with ashes. Some funeral directors retain them. After (say) 10 years, they will call the relevant family to collect or the ashes will be disposed of - known it 😪to happen more than once. Then a family may have ashes that they don't know what to do with. In my view, it's all meaningless, so I hope my ashes will be chucked in a bin immediately, so nobody has to deal with this issue.

It's quite a strange thing for you to be so concerned about given its your in laws and it's been 6 years since she died.

I'm probably the complete opposite to you. I have no interest in visiting a a grave or place where ashes are scattered. For me that's only connected to the bodily remains. It links to the death, not the life of the person.

Same here. We loved them dearly when alive- ashes do not matter at all.

We didn't collect my Dad's ashes. We asked the crematorium staff to just scatter them in the garden of remembrance. We didn't want to think of my Dad reduced to that