To find it so hard to look together

[Ineedamanicure]

Other women seem to manage it and I just struggle.

Like I leave the house thinking I look fine then I’ll catch sight of myself or notice something eg

• Loose thread on dress and hem coming down
• tights actually bobbly around the ankles and feet with grey bobbles
• two massive stray grey hairs on head
• hair growing out of chin
• nail polish on hands or toes chipping
• Heels ( I live in hot country so often have bare legs and feet) need exfoliating as hard and awful looking
• Mascara slid down face
• stain on clothes
• Hair frizzy despite styling
• Missed patch on knee when shaving leg
• Scrape mark on handbag

I can’t afford to go for treatments so need to upkeep myself and it’s just such hard work. I always seem to miss something. Had meetings this week with women who just looked perfect and I just struggle so much to look together.

Anyone else find it hard.

I used to be immaculately turned out pre kids and now I'm just like you OP. I simply don't have the time and money to look good any more.

I do make it to the hairdresser three times a year but that is it.

I have found OPI Nail Envy very good for making my nails look better without actual colour, so you can't see if it chips.

I keep tweezers and some basic make up in my glovebox and have a pair of nail clippers that attach to my keyring.

Double sided tape for sticking up a hemline.

Patterned tops don't show spills.

Clear nail polish will stop a ladder running in your tights.

@minipie Ive always carried hand cream, lip balm/lipstick and a mini hairbrush. I freshen up at lunchtime at work. That’s not uncommon. I don’t carry tweezers as I’ll do that at home. OP I either have bare or beige coloured nail varnish that doesn’t show chips. Keep work outfits simple and interchangeable and change out of it when home, repair if needed and hang up. Bit of effort on Sunday night to make sure all shoes clean etc.

Also in a hot country try thin palazzo pants and flat shoes. Cool, smart and no shaving required.

Nobody actually needs nail polish. I haven’t worn any in years because of allergies and it’s been very liberating to be free of it. I’ve also noticed how few women actually wear it.

I would spend some time thinking about what’s really important to you and then eliminate any unnecessary steps. Keep your nails clean, short and buffed and forget the polish. Get some nice ballet flats to wear with dresses or skirts so that you don’t have to worry if your feet are always sandal ready. Spend a bit of time figuring out a chic but easy style you can do with your hair so that you can look put together even if you’re having a bad hair day.

As others have said, the easiest way to make sure your clothes are in good order is to audit them frequently and repair anything broken and get rid of anything irretrievably broken or stained.

But also, some of it is just about recognising that there are some women out there who have the money/time/skills to always look amazing, but unfortunately we can’t all be those women and that’s just how life is. Looking perfect costs either a lot of money or a lot of time (usually both) and few people
are able to meet such a high standard.

I find it hard. I map out a beauty routine which involves hairdressers, trips to the beauty salon, etc. Then I decide I can't afford it and that I can do it myself then either don't (cos I'm lazy) or fuck it up.

I am typing with literally hairy fingers. I'm not joking.

You seem very defensive. @SanjayKarma didn't come across as rude or harsh. They said you are being overly critical of yourself and gave some suggestions.

Your response suggests you might generally be struggling. Is that the case

You sound so um...angry. It's really not at all unusual to carry a magnifying mirror in your makeup bag. I have a wee pouch. Hand cream, lip balm, hair elastics, spare contact lenses, eye drops, MAGNIFYING MIRROR, tweezers, plasters.

Lots of people do this. Why does this bother you so much.

@sanjaykarma was only giving you some tips in reply to your OP.

It's very hard to stay looking good all day - especially if you're living and working in a hot climate. It's a good idea to have all those things on you as standard if you want to feel presentable for meetings...you don't have to but you were expressing that you didn't know how other women manage it. This is how! It isn't easy and requires good habits and the right tools to achieve that level of maintenance.

Definitely throw out the bobbly tights. Find some good ones, stock up with at least 10 pairs, and then keep replacing them as soon as they start to wear. And find a better mascara - it sounds like you may have oily eyes which is making the mascara run. There are so many recommendations for better ones. I also recommend dermaplaning once a week - that'll catch any stray hairs and is a good way to keep your skin fresh and exfoliated.

It’s hard to look good all day every day op, and I bet very few people notice the things about you that you notice about yourself. That’s what I tell myself anyway. I do carry a few things round in my handbag for touch ups. Also a sewing kit in case of loose threads etc.
If you are in hotter climes, ditch the mascara and get your eye lashes dyed. Ditto hair if you don’t like the grey (I colour mine, others don’t care, whatever). Walk tall, stick some lippie on and don’t give a shit! Works for me.

I bet when you look back at pictures of your younger self you think “what was I fretting about”, you’re going to do the same in ten years time looking at photos of yourself from now.

I dislike grooming/maintenance only slightly less than I dislike looking a mess so I have a routine (list of what needs plucking, grating, oiling etc and I try to do it all within an hour at the weekend. I find trying to get it done quicker than the weekend before makes it more fun 😀

You sound so um...angry. It's really not at all unusual to carry a magnifying mirror in your makeup bag. I have a wee pouch. Hand cream, lip balm, hair elastics, spare contact lenses, eye drops, MAGNIFYING MIRROR, tweezers, plasters.

I agree. I always have those things, apart from tweezers, in my bag in a small make up pouch. I also bring a mini nail file in case I break a nail, which I often do.

You sound burnt out.

If you're in a job that requires such high maintenance then surely it pays a wage to outsource lots of this?

I'd only expect childless very high earning woman to adhere to those standards.

Maybe it's the culture you're in, Italy?