AIBU to just want a hysterectomy and to be done with all this perimenopause bullshit?

[Opinuga]

I am 52. I haven't functioned properly for around three and a half years due to heavy bleeding. I've tried everything, it seems. Mirena - made me angry and suicidal. Never been suicidal before. Tried to cope with that by using oestradiol. Didn't work. Paid a private GP to take the mirena out because I couldn't see my own GP before I jumped in the river, then had to stop using oestradiol (didn't realise that before I handed over my 150 quid tho) and then hurtled straight into unmedicated peri, not sleeping, hot flushes 10x per hour, haemorrhaging what felt like all the time, an actual nightmare life. So went onto hrt, calmed down a bit but not really, upped the oestradiol, then upped it again, six months each time while I "wait and see", now coming to the end of this latest wait and see and I've woken up flushing, gone to the loo and yes I'm having yet another big bleed, so I already know that tomorrow is a write off and I am so sick of this. I can't do anything while I'm bleeding because it is so painful and so heavy. I honestly feel like I've tried everything and nothing is working and now I just want my womb out. It's serving no purpose and only causing me problems. Has anyone else experienced this and did hysterectomy solve it for you?

I think a hysterectomy sounds like an excellent idea for you. It's a relatively simple and safe procedure these days. What's the benefit of not doing it at this point?

What type of oestrogen and progestogen are you taking for hrt?

I'm on oestradiol 3 pumps a day and 2 utrogestan for 14 days out of 28. My GP surgery (who I only speak to by phone, erratically ) has referred me to gynae consultant - nine months ago so hopefully will come good soon. I really want to push for a hysterectomy. I don't think I would do so if I lived in a country where I could get consistent healthcare but as it stands I just fill in online forms and have the odd telephone conversation with people who do tweaks to my regime after which I wait for months to realise it's not working and then fill in another online form. Meanwhile I have more and more days that I write off to bleeding, more and more nights that I don't sleep.

Ask your GP for a choose & book referral to your nearest private hospital, the NHS pays. Tell the consultant you see exactly what you have posted here. You may have a fight to get a hysterectomy, you could also join Benenden & after 6 months you could get one done privately, it's £15 a month.

HRT won't necessarily help your bleeding issue. It sounds like you need a surgical rather than a medical solution. Even if you could speak to a GP/gynaecologist daily, it probably wouldn't make much difference.

At this point, what point does your uterus serve other than making you miserable? Your past having (more) kids age. And it only means you have to take more medication (the utrogestan) rather than just oestrogen. Getting rid of it eliminates the bleeding problem, not to mention the risk of endometrial cancer in the future.

So I say go for it. Tell the gynaecologist that's what you want at your first appointment and get listed asap.

I have been having much the same experience as you. Trying to control the bleeding hormonal/medically but only because I can't afford the cost of the hysterectomy (live in the US). The pills are definitely not working ☹️. I would ABSOLUTELY do the hysterectomy.....push for it!

An ablation is less major than a hysterectomy. I was back to work within a week of having one. While it was being done a fibroid which had not showed up on the pre-op scan was revealed.The surgeon removed the fibroid and then did the ablation in one operation. The bleeding problem was solved with only very light periods afterwards. The surgeon was fairly sure it was the fibroid to blame. I tried the Mirena too and was constantly in tears with it.

I could have written this post 😔

I am just so fed up with it. It's affecting every aspect of my life.

I cant take HRT . Am currently awake because my dry itchy skin is driving me crackers....

In the meantime go to a good naturopath and get some herbal supplements. It helped me considerably and moved the bleeding back into the normal range.

Have you looked into/discussed endometrial ablation? Less invasive, and hysterectomy increases the chance/severity of incontinence as you're removing part of your bladders support system.

look, i know you are pissed off at your uterus but it supports lots of other stuff in and around there and taking i out disrupts all the organs nested up against it.
like others have said request an ablation.
go private.

Sorry to hear you're struggling op.

I know this isn't the same, but I take hormone therapy drugs to kill off the oestrogen in my body as I have hormone positive breast cancer. I've had my ovaries removed too and I have been experiencing the awful flushes associated with menopause.

Someone in a cancer group I'm in recommend asking the gp for a drug to help with the flushes called Clonidine and I swear I hardly have a flush at all now. It took about 3 weeks to see some improvements but now I might have 1 flush a week.

I know it won't help with your bleeding and other difficulties but for the flushes it's made my life much more bearable. Might be worth a try xx

You don't want the hysterectomy, which is major surgery, pelvic floor needs to be separated, reattached etc. No driving/lifting for weeks and weeks. And sometimes hysterectomy leaves the ovaries, which means you still get the hormones, but not the bleeding etc.

What you want is an oophrectomy - removal of your ovaries (& tubes). They produce the hormones, so you go into instant menopause - but not the stop/start of peri. It's day surgery, few days recovery and bonus is no risk of silent, ovarian cancer etc.

I had this done in 2015, and had 6-12 months of menopause systems, but not badly. Then been fine afterwards. I never had HRT, but that is an option for those who menopause symptoms are severe.

I know someone going through this right now who has had a hysterectomy previously. The only side effect she hasn’t complained about is the bleeding, which makes sense. I’m just throwing this out there to say that the surgery alone doesn’t stop the insomnia, rage, headaches and general symptoms for all, in case you’re expecting a fix all. Though hopefully it does if you go for it.

No driving/lifting for weeks and weeks

I was driving 2 weeks after my laparoscopic hysterectomy (which most straightforward procedures are), and back to the gym and work after 3. Yes, you do need to be careful with lifting, particularly straightaway, but it's really not that long a recovery period.

I had mine done on the Friday & was back driving within a week, I was back on the school run 10 days after having it done.

Another who could have written this post.

I had an ablation at 38 and it did solve the issues for a while. Last year at 44, I had a hysterectomy and it was the best thing I ever did. I am so happy with the results. They discovered endometriosis, which explained a lot. Surgery went wonderfully, zero complications. I allowed myself time to recover, that is important.

I would talk to your doctor immediately. Life is just too short for this. You have suffered enough.

I don't know if this helps. I had the dry itchy skin too and it was unbearable. I empathise completely with you. Couldn't sleep, was scratching myself alot. Honestly awful.

I read somewhere that being even a little bit dehydrated triggers menopausal itchy skin and it suggested upping water intake. So I tried it.

When I drink a lot of water in a day then it noticeably calms down/ goes away. Few days where I don't drink as much and it comes back.

Menopause is just a miserable nightmare.

Could have written your post. Horrific bleeding and pain caused by fibroids. Pills and Mirena did not work. Expensive private GP did not work. Could not get a hysterectomy on the NHS. Nobody took me seriously. Every month I lost a week to bleeding.

So about 2 months ago I went back to my home country, paid for private health care and had a complete hysterectomy taking everything out. It was laparoscopic. Best thing I ever did. I did take it slow in recovery but I was walking around after a week. Went back to work after a month though I can WFH. Only downside is my hot flushes have increased. Maybe I need to increase my HRT. Better than looking like I am in 'Carrie' though!

I had a hysterectomy at 45 due to massive fibroid. Luckily for me it was so large it was pressing on my bladder and they couldn't rule it out as cancerous so I had a hysterectomy within 3 weeks.
It was the best day of my life, including my wedding day and my 3 kids.
A lifetime (I started periods at 10) of pain, flooding periods every 3 weeks was over.
I had open surgery but was still back at work (desk job) 6 weeks later.
It changed my life.

I don't think you should jump straight to a hysterectomy (there's other less invasive things that you could try first).
Have a look at the nice guidelines.
I ended up becoming disabled after a hysterectomy, lost my job at age 34 and will never work again. People often say just have a hysterectomy without thinking of the consequences. I'm probably in the minority but it happens. I didn't have 6 weeks off work and go back to work, I retired in my 30s.
Look at all the options and think very carefully about what you want and what could happen.

I hear you. Seeing the gynae in 1 week and going to ask for the same. I would have had the ablation if I could but wrong shape/couldn't happen.

However, on your level of oestrogen the British Menopause society recommends a higher dose of Utrogestan to balance oestrogen and prevent uterus lining proliferation. So you should be on 200 daily or 300 for 14 days. I moved to the higher utro dose and the quantity of blood has diminished. Just not the continuous nature..(which I think is a fibroid)

So yes, ask for ablation or hysterectomy but also increase your progesterone

I am really sorry to hear that @Itwasfinetillitwasnt. How terrible.

I do think there is a dichotomy in medical thinking. In the UK, my gynie was very reluctant to prescribe a hysterectomy as she considered it too invasive and "barbaric". However, in my home country, many women do. My mum had one.

I can't tell you how liberating it was packing for a trip to Paris a couple of weeks ago, thinking "how many pads should I pack", then realising I never have to pack pads again!

It might also be worth requesting a scan. I’ve suffered for years with bleeding and pain. Tried everything but nothing helped. GP eventually referred me for a scan. I have been diagnosed with Adenomyosis and now on the waiting list for a hysterectomy.

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/adenomyosis/