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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Terrible class teacher causing concern amongst parents

303 replies

DodgyMcDodgerson · 01/02/2024 18:55

My son is in Year 2. To briefly summarise, his class teacher shouts at the class frequently, there’s alot of punishments both individual and whole class, alot of putting kids down and responding to them very abruptly.
most of the girls in the class are terrified of her (as in to the point some girls are crying coming into school, another little girl wet herself rather than interrupt the teacher to ask to go to the toilet. When the girls mother suggested her daughter had been nervous to put her hand up in case she got shouted at, the teacher completely dismissed this as unthinkable). There are a few boys in particular who she seems to really
single out to tell off, and these are lovely kids - not unruly or being disruptive. She’s telling one boy off for not understanding the work as an example. The kids are unanimous in their dislike of her. The parents in the class are unanimous in their dislike of her.Literally not heard one positive word about her.
one child has already transferred to a different school and there is talk of more
following.
bearing in mind that this is not even 6 months into a new job and in a class of 28 children there have already been at least 5 complaints (that I’m aware of) - is this teacher likely to remain at the school????

OP posts:
KillerTomato7 · 03/02/2024 10:34

adviceneeded1990 · 03/02/2024 08:55

@DodgyMcDodgerson if you are concerned about YOUR child, discuss with a member of senior management at the school. As a teacher, I strongly advise you not to mention anyone else’s child or opinion though…there’s a certain type of parent does this and the “but EVERYONE thinks” guarantees no reasonable adult will listen to a word you say.

She might well be a terrible teacher. She might have a difficult class who need a firm hand. You say these boys are well behaved with no way of knowing that unless you’ve been in class - many kids are great in school and awful at home and vice versa! The small things she sends children out for might be the persistent low level disruption that destroys educational opportunities for others!

If you are concerned for your own child, address those specific concerns. The rest is gossip from people who frankly don’t have enough to do with their time.

For all you telling the OP not to mention anyone else’s children, I’m curious how this system works for children with parents who don’t speak fluent English, are socio-economically disadvantaged, or simply lack the confidence to challenge an authority figure.

I guess those children just have to content themselves with being bullied? And this is putting aside the fact that a teacher constantly screaming at one child can be pretty upsetting for the others as well.

echt · 03/02/2024 10:38

KillerTomato7 · 03/02/2024 10:34

For all you telling the OP not to mention anyone else’s children, I’m curious how this system works for children with parents who don’t speak fluent English, are socio-economically disadvantaged, or simply lack the confidence to challenge an authority figure.

I guess those children just have to content themselves with being bullied? And this is putting aside the fact that a teacher constantly screaming at one child can be pretty upsetting for the others as well.

Relating other parents' accounts no matter what the issues are hearsay.

KillerTomato7 · 03/02/2024 10:45

sarahd29 · 03/02/2024 08:58

What has the other child wetting herself got to do with you? If the other parents got a problem with how they were told or what happened then it’s on them to speak to the HT. My son wet himself this year (Yr 3) and the TA came out and told me, other parents were there probably overhearing…in his case he’s a lazy little sod who didn’t want to miss forest school. The wet things had to be explained and it was no problem (other than me telling him off because he knows better) No other parent said a word, and I won’t say a word if and when it happens to them. It’s not my business.

None of this is your business unless it’s affecting your child. You’ve given examples of other kids being affected but not yours.

”Overhearing” and saying there’s no what’s app group and we are not discussing it is pointless you are obvs chatting with other parents about it somehow to know how they feel. You’re talking to another poster on
here to see
if it’s someone they know..what if
it is. The teacher was probably hired and referenced. You’ll go back to your group with more fuel. You want her out. it’s her
or you. Carry on with your campaign which will end when your child
moves up or leaves or the teacher goes.

If not, work with your HT not against them. Stay in your own lane and save the chats with the HT for when your kid is affected.

“What has another child wetting themself got to do with you.”

The phenomenon you are witnessing is known as ‘caring about the wellbeing of a child.’ Most adults do this even when that child is not related to us.

And teaching is a profession, not a mystery cult. A few of you keep peddling this bizarre idea that parents are breaking a holy vow of silence by discussing the performance of the person charged with safeguarding their children. Nonsense: we are public servants, and they have every right to hold us accountable for their children’s wellbeing.

Diggin · 03/02/2024 10:48

Or perhaps the teacher is new and asserting her authority? Covid aftermath has created many unsocialised kids. Discipline and learning can be achieved in different ways. Maybe the teacher is newly qualified? Raise concerns by all means but do it without the ‘she must go’ agenda

Newsenmum · 03/02/2024 10:52

My experience of year 2 is that most kids love their teacher. This is unusual especially if they’re actually terrified 🥲 I’d personally be speaking to another member of staff - head of year perhaps.

HappydaysArehere · 03/02/2024 11:01

ScabbyHorse · 01/02/2024 19:17

Can you volunteer to read with the class once a week and see what she's really like?

That is the best idea. You will be doing something useful and you will get a better impression of what the classroom atmosphere is like.

sarahd29 · 03/02/2024 11:01

Rubbish, if another parent poked their nose in about a conversation a teacher was having with me it would be awful.

eastegg · 03/02/2024 12:23

It’s unfair and obtuse to say that OP doesn’t really know because she hasn’t seen the teacher teach. Well of course she hasn’t. By the same token parents would never be in a position to form a view about a teacher, ever. (She has heard her being gobby about another parent though, which is interesting).

What we have to do as parents is tread cautiously, use our common sense and judgment and yes, if that tells us there’s something wrong, complain. Of course don’t go off gossip, but neither should you stand back because you ‘weren’t there’.

eastegg · 03/02/2024 12:25

KillerTomato7 · 03/02/2024 10:45

“What has another child wetting themself got to do with you.”

The phenomenon you are witnessing is known as ‘caring about the wellbeing of a child.’ Most adults do this even when that child is not related to us.

And teaching is a profession, not a mystery cult. A few of you keep peddling this bizarre idea that parents are breaking a holy vow of silence by discussing the performance of the person charged with safeguarding their children. Nonsense: we are public servants, and they have every right to hold us accountable for their children’s wellbeing.

👏👏👏Well said

sarahd29 · 03/02/2024 12:30

No it isn’t, if the child’s parents have something to say then that’s fair enough but op isn’t the parent of the child. We all care about the children around us, but as the parents were there it’s nothing to do with her.

adviceneeded1990 · 03/02/2024 13:11

KillerTomato7 · 03/02/2024 10:34

For all you telling the OP not to mention anyone else’s children, I’m curious how this system works for children with parents who don’t speak fluent English, are socio-economically disadvantaged, or simply lack the confidence to challenge an authority figure.

I guess those children just have to content themselves with being bullied? And this is putting aside the fact that a teacher constantly screaming at one child can be pretty upsetting for the others as well.

I can’t speak for everyone but my school provides translators for EAL parents.

Can you go to the police and report a crime happening to another person? No, not unless you are a witness. Which this parent isn’t. As a previous poster said, anything aside from what this parent has seen and heard is hearsay. so she should absolutely raise any issues her own child is experiencing and fight for fair treatment etc, this teacher might be totally crap at her job! But how other children behave in class is none of her business!

Also, do you realise how insulting it is to imply that a socioeconomically disadvantaged person would have problems talking to a teacher? I grew up exceptionally economically disadvantaged and I am the teacher FFS! Plenty of poor people can hold perfectly coherent and confident conversations!

Coyoacan · 03/02/2024 13:42

Whoa. So now we are not supposed to speak up for a child being bullied unless we are their parents? Talk about divide and conquer.

I, individualistically, removed my child from a school because she was being affected by the cruelty of a teacher to her classmates. Other parents, more intelligently and empathetically, went and complained and got the teacher sacked.

TizerorFizz · 03/02/2024 13:46

Often parents who are not articulate lose their patience with a teacher and can be aggressive. Mayberry hard to be reasonable. The op isn’t going to be a difficult parent but she should advocate for her dc.

I had a very sensible child and she certainly could relay very accurately what was happening in class. Observant articulate dc can and they do observe the distress of other dc. Y2 is perfectly old enough form opinions and have empathy for class mates.

adviceneeded1990 · 03/02/2024 14:07

@Coyoacan the teacher was most likely failing to meet the professional standards that we are contractually bound to maintain. This is why they were sacked. If every teacher with a parental complaint was sacked, we’d have empty schools 😂 but I’m sure the complainers felt great telling their wee pals they got someone fired 🙈.

Teachers are human beings. Some are rubbish at their jobs and should be doing something else, 100%. Most (not all!) are committed to education, have a love of children and want the best for everyone around them in their school community.

What I will say is that if people treated an employee of the local ASDA or Tesco the way some people treat teachers, they’d be in prison. Just something to consider.

Coyoacan · 03/02/2024 14:41

This is why they were sacked. If every teacher with a parental complaint was sacked, we’d have empty schools

So how do we get a teacher fired if we are only allowed to go in one by one and only with a complaint about how our own child has been treated, with no mention of what our children report to be happening in the classroom?

In my youth I was so much opposed to criticising teachers that I preferred to withdraw my child rather than complain. I admire and prize good teachers above nearly every other profession and, if it were up to me, teachers would be the highest paid profession. But part of the reason I prize the good ones is because the bad ones can cause such lasting harm.

TizerorFizz · 03/02/2024 19:22

@Coyoacan Parental complaints do not get a teacher sacked. It’s not your role.

What should happen is the teacher is required to have performance management goals set in consultation with the head. The head cannot have a meaningful discussion about goals if they bury their head in the sand. So they must know what’s going on in their own classrooms. This could be progress of dc, behaviour etc. Teachers are then asked to evidence how they have met the objectives. Pay increments are then given or not if applicable.

If the head is aware of issues with the teacher and their work is falling short of professional standards, a teacher is given help and mentoring to improve and the capability procedures are started. If there is no discernible improvement via evidence, a teacher will be required to leave or not quality. Clearly this is rare but it’s not for parents to get involved. The school will listen to parents but must have evidence the teacher is not meeting required standards.

If a school doesn’t take steps to improve the quality of teaching, it can expect parents to leave and complaints to Ofsted.

adviceneeded1990 · 03/02/2024 19:43

@Coyoacan if your goal in life is “so how do we get a teacher fired?” there’s really nothing left to say here 😂

Like @TizerorFizz has said, if a teacher is so poor at their job that they cannot meet their professional obligations or standards then they will soon find themselves unemployed.

However, in my years of experience, including working in management teams, nothing will ensure your complaint is filed under “shite, gossip, people with nothing better to do with their day,” faster than bringing other people’s children into it. Or worse, “well, EVERYONE thinks.” 🙈

If there is a problem being caused to your child by a teacher then by all means I’d encourage any parent to approach the school management team and advocate loudly for your child’s well-being. If you are calm, rational, and stick to discussing your own situation, you are much more likely to be seen as a caring and concerned parent who wants to work with the school to achieve the best outcomes for your child.

The only way I’d mention anyone else’s child to anyone was if I had a genuine safeguarding concern. Anything else is none of my business.

IgnoranceNotOk · 03/02/2024 20:12

How is your child getting on in the class OP? Behaviour wise and academically?

What were the previous teachers like?
Some classes have years of inconsistency with fluffy teachers who they love as they can get away with anything and expectations are low and behaviour is low level but not acceptable.

Of course, some teachers are awful and shouldn’t be in the job but this may also be a very challenging class whose attainment is low (or worse with the data being inflated when they are no where near that level.) or has high levels on unmet SEN needs.

If the teacher is following the behaviour policy then that is what you’ve signed up to.
A teacher cannot have children constantly disrupting even if it is ‘just talking’, not listening or them all thinking they can go to the toilet all time. Behaviour for learning is really important and that doesn’t mean sitting there silently but also engaging and contributing to lessons.

TizerorFizz · 03/02/2024 23:21

No behaviour policy includes shouting by a teacher. It is usually a fairly detailed document which is about encouraging good behaviour. Of course there are sanctions but class punishment won’t be one. Therefore if this has happened, the OP’s child is affected. She might also be unhappy at seeing friends unhappy. Did child wet pants in school? If so in y2 this is not what children expect to H
happen.

DC do need to move to working independently and also follow rules for toilet breaks and water - which will be laid down in policies. However this should never be a big jump in KS1 . It’s a gradual transition. I’m struggling to see how the OP’s child is not affected by a shouting teacher. Or other children being scared and upset.

sarahd29 · 04/02/2024 08:40

I’ve posted on here about this a couple of times because I was in your shoes and got it so wrong.

The teacher we thought was awful and who nearly left due to parent power and our complaints was actually having to correct behaviour from my son’s class reception teacher . She had the misfortune of Year 1 with them. The reception teacher let them
down not just educationally but teaching behaviour for the whole class. His new Yr 1 teacher had so much flack as she tried to sort out basic manners and class discipline that they put his old reception teacher in to cover the same class in Yr 2 because we all loved the kind gentle reception teacher but it all came out in the end that it was because they she hadn’t taught the basics when they should’ve been and were very very behind to the point the YR 2/ reception teacher left the week they did Sats.

The Yr 1 teacher got the brunt of everything she left behind in reception as she tried to sort out behaviour and we were vile.

Now in Yr 3 they are a grand bunch of keen learners. YR 1 did a great job but I wish I knew then what I know now.

Context is everything.

IgnoranceNotOk · 04/02/2024 08:50

sarahd29 · 04/02/2024 08:40

I’ve posted on here about this a couple of times because I was in your shoes and got it so wrong.

The teacher we thought was awful and who nearly left due to parent power and our complaints was actually having to correct behaviour from my son’s class reception teacher . She had the misfortune of Year 1 with them. The reception teacher let them
down not just educationally but teaching behaviour for the whole class. His new Yr 1 teacher had so much flack as she tried to sort out basic manners and class discipline that they put his old reception teacher in to cover the same class in Yr 2 because we all loved the kind gentle reception teacher but it all came out in the end that it was because they she hadn’t taught the basics when they should’ve been and were very very behind to the point the YR 2/ reception teacher left the week they did Sats.

The Yr 1 teacher got the brunt of everything she left behind in reception as she tried to sort out behaviour and we were vile.

Now in Yr 3 they are a grand bunch of keen learners. YR 1 did a great job but I wish I knew then what I know now.

Context is everything.

This!

As parents we have to remember we don’t know the dynamics of the class or how effective the teachers are.

I have this but my class are much older - they’ve had a range of poor teachers so have missed basic learning but also their behaviour has been appalling - I know as I’ve covered them for years when I came back from maternity and after they’ve then tried for a year with a new, inconsistent teacher (still learning) they’ve realised after me saying repeatedly that they need an experienced teacher with strong behaviour management.
Sometimes I wish I’d kept my mouth shut 😂 but they’re making progress and behaviour is so much better.
All the parents seemed happy at parents eve even though some of the children were worried about coming to my class - I just follow the behaviour system and I will not allow anyone to disrupt others’ learning!

RaraRachael · 04/02/2024 10:37

I wouldn't suggest going in to "help" with reading or whatever. We had to stop parent volunteers as they were gossiping about what level reading other people's children were on etc.

FindingNeverland28 · 04/02/2024 11:03

Never mind what the other parents are saying, if you feel that your child is being treated poorly by their class teacher then ask for a meeting with the head teacher to discuss it. If you are not satisfied with the outcome, then you can ask for the contact details of the chair of governors and write a letter to them.

EmeraldA129 · 04/02/2024 11:22

I remember being in P2 and thinking my teacher was horrible. We all did.

we also all liked her when she wasn’t our teacher & we were in P1 & P3 etc.

if you have a concern, highlight it to the head as others have done & let them review the situation.

Don’t take the views of the kids as gospel, they quite often have a limited view of how things are & this year will be a change to much more formal schooling with less play.

TizerorFizz · 04/02/2024 13:49

@EmeraldA129 This is y2. It’s not a play based curriculum. I would also expect my DD and this DD to be able to say what was happening in class and how they feel. We also know children should be listened to.