To move to a village as a mixed family?

[joonam]

Good evening,

we have been offered a property in a village, think 15 minutes drive from Brighton!

we lived in London for 20 years and now south Manchester (wilmslow) for the past 4. (For history) but want to be back in the south!

we are Muslim although not practising really, but my children have Arabic names. I am French and my husband is from Iran.

he is very excited but I’m sort of concerned that my children (5,2,1) will possibly be subject to racism? The school my daughter is in now, she’s the only non white looking one in her class, but it is a diverse area in general.

am I overthinking this? I remember having similar concerns when moving from London but I’m originally from here which made it easier but the new village I will know nobody at all.

Anyone

I live in a village OP and there are plenty of mixed race families here. There are many kids from different ethnic backgrounds at my kids school.

I work in primary schools including very rural, tiny ones and there are always children from different ethnic backgrounds. I have seen no signs of racism whatsoever.

Hi OP. I grew up in a village about 15 minutes from Brighton. This was the 80's we had a trans identifying man, a lesbian couple and an Indian family. Old fashioned conservative English villages are the most liberal places you can imagine. Go and visit, my guess is you will all be welcomed.

You can encounter assholes everywhere, but I’m an immigrant (though a white one) and have lived in rural villages for over a decade, like properly rural and old school. We have non-English speaking immigrants, a few folks like me who aren’t British but pass if we don’t open our mouths, a mixed family, last village we had a family who moved there from Burundi. I’m sure sometimes there are whispers but on the whole everyone seems quite welcoming.

This is reassuring!

I remind myself if my SIL can move to the middle of a tiny welsh valley in south wales and she is very practising and evidently so. I think we will be fine!

I don't want to come across also like I'm accusing villages of being racist as we experienced racism in a very ethnic part of west London too! From both white and Asian families.

It's just the unknown as I'm not familiar with the area at all

My kids went to a village school at one point and tolerance there was a million times better than the school in the next town (re ethnicity, religion, send, everything).

My dh thinks I'm being ridiculous worrying.

Ironically in her last school in London, she was getting bullied (in Nursery!!) by another Iranian girl and here in this school she has been so happy,
so I myself know that it's not a given even in a multi cultural area, it's just the fear of moving and the unknown.

But i'm also very excited!

Surely it depends on the village! I'd ask for a tour of the school and see how diverse it is.

Mixed family here similar mix to you middle eastern/ European. Very happily lived in a village area for 16 year with children. Children went/ go to small village school then local town for secondary. Never ever had an issue. We have lovely neighbours our children play with and a great community. I don't see why people are so worried about villages and diversity, we have local families of all sorts of ethnic backgrounds here, we all talk about the same things and moan about the same pot holes etc. Kids make friends and you get to know the parents.
Village life is often rather liberal. We are a very expensive area people are well educated cultured , we have a lot of old money and the saying as long as it doesn't scare the horses does rather apply. As long as you are a nice decent hard working family who smiles says good morning you will be fine.

To be honest it is the person not the place that is racist. If you have a nasty person it could be anywhere, Towns and villages. In my experience of living in a small village we welcome all new comers and I have never seen or heard any racist comments.
the majority of people in society are not racist but we sadly hear more about the nasty people who are. As I said in our village we welcome everyone so move and get involved with all the fab village community events. The ones in our village who seem to have some negative feelings towards them ( not racism ) are the ones who arrive and don’t try and be involved and be part of the community.
best wishes.

@Highfivemum absolutely agree. Our village is the same, and anyone who wants to be part of the community is welcomed.

Anyone who wants to actively avoid it is unlikely to feel welcome, regardless of their background.

It's probably better in the UK than in France tbh. And 15 miles from Brighton should be full of educated, open minded folk. Maybe go and have a look, see if the vibe seems tolerant. I'll be surprised if it's full of inbred types side-eyeing you for being incomers or different, even though some of these people still probably exist.