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Having a child stopped me being so socially awkward/shy and overthinking things

10 replies

Findingbeautyinwinter · 27/01/2024 20:40

At least, it *Seems to have 🤷🏻‍♀️

Pre Dd, I was a lot more relaxed in a different way, but I constantly over thought everything, analysed so many encounters at work, had low confidence at work and socially and was just very in my own head.
I still occasionally suffer a real lack of confidence/insecurity out of nowhere and have to work myself up to meet friends etc, but mainly it rarely happens now.
I also used to worry constantly about my parents, I don’t now, which sounds cold, I just don’t seem as emotionally invested in anything as much, I’m a lot more level headed.
Is it because a young dc just takes up all your time? I’m older and fatter, so would think I’d feel less confident, do you just not give a crap as much once you have children?
I hope it lasts 🙏

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Am I being unreasonable?

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Findingbeautyinwinter · 27/01/2024 20:55

No one else?

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Lammveg · 27/01/2024 20:59

I agree. I'd always worry about talking to other people, I'm quite socially anxious, but having DD has made me more confident in that i don't want her to be anxious like me!

However I am now more anxious about my own health whereas before I wasn't really bothered about dying.

SisterMichael · 27/01/2024 21:02

That’s interesting. For me that’s a worry, that my own shyness would hold any potential DC back. Glad to hear it hasn’t for you!

Findingbeautyinwinter · 27/01/2024 21:05

@Lammveg Yes, that’s true too, I’ve had to push myself more for her sake, plus she’s massively confident and sociable (no idea how that happened!)
I also agree about the health anxiety etc, I try not to think about it or it’s just too much

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Findingbeautyinwinter · 27/01/2024 21:05

@SisterMichael I think it’s just forced me to push myself more as it’s not about me anymore and that helps a lot

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Flockameanie · 27/01/2024 21:06

Total opposite for me. Before DC I was very confident outgoing and sure of myself. Since having them (DC1 is 10) I’ve gradually turned into someone I don’t really recognise. Far less confident, second guess most of my decisions (parenting and otherwise) and don’t really know who I am anymore.

StrictlyAFemaleFemale · 27/01/2024 21:07

I don't have the energy or headspace to care about a lot of things which has been quite liberated.

StrictlyAFemaleFemale · 27/01/2024 21:07


Findingbeautyinwinter · 27/01/2024 21:08

@StrictlyAFemaleFemale Yes, that’s it too

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Findingbeautyinwinter · 27/01/2024 21:09

@Flockameanie I do get what you mean by that, in other areas I’m perhaps less confident. I loved to travel before, would happily go to places alone etc, I can’t imagine doing that now, I barely even want to travel anywhere.

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