What would you do if your child was scammed out of money?

[Bringonthesun24]

Basically as my title suggests, would you loan them the money until they could either pay it off or received the money back through the bank? Or would you just offer some kinds words and let them sort out their own issues.

The scammed amount would be less than 500 pounds and could be afforded by the parents.

I would definitely help out my DC in this situation

I would help my child yes, as long as I was physically able to.

I am sorry your parents are not supportive in the ways you would like them to be. I think people who have not experienced persistent lack of parental support when needed (whether emotional, practical, financial, etc) find it difficult to imagine how hurtful it is.

If I had the money to give them then I would, without hesitation. I wouldn't aak to be paid back.

To the poster who said most adults can afford £500, maybe some can, others definitely not, it's an unimaginable amount.

There's been other things going on eg. A family court case, my health.

I did have contingency money until I had to pay a large legal bill at the last moment. So now I don't have that

Have you told them you need help?

If it was my child whether or not they were an adult and I could afford it I’d give them the money. I look after my family as much as I can no conditions.

Hopefully they’ll choose me a cracking old peoples home 😁

@NoTouch "Some parents would help out, others would think it was an important lesson to learn.

Neither are wrong."

Well, the people who think humans learn best by being treated unkindly and punished are a^^ bit wrong....

Have you actually asked them for it? I would also assume that most adults in my family could easily shoulder a £300 cost without needing help, even though it is obviously shit.

I would lend the money on the understanding that it would be paid back especially as there are bills involved and a grandchild . I just think not helping where you can could lead to other money problems if bills cannot be paid .
Then there's the other issue of why not help out when it's needed instead of waiting until you die to help your children ? It makes sense to help where if can to me .

Unless you have asked to borrow the money I think you are being a bit unreasonable.

Etsy? Sadly I don't think there's much chance of retrieving the money, it's happening to loads of sellers atm especially new ones.

If the bank is going to refund you, I would imagine they would authorise an overdraft temporarily too - have you spoken to them?

I think you should ask them if you'd like a loan. They may not realise the situation.

Yes Etsy! I opened a shop up 4 years ago and didn't receive anything like this.i closed and reopened. I should have twigged really! Can't believe I fell for it!

The scammers on Etsy are sneaky because they send a message that appears to be FROM Etsy.

Etsy, in my opinion, haven't really done enough to protect sellers. Doesn't help much really - I don't know if your bank can help?

What makes you sure that your bank will definitely replace the lost funds?
Have they already told you that they will? How long do they think it will take? Can't you ask them to speed it up/ make you an emergency interest-free loan/ overdraft?

If this repayment is definitely happening, and you just need some money to tide you over for the next week or so, you could try asking your parents (or other friends/ relatives) for a short-term loan of £100 or so. It's unclear why you need them to pay the full cost of the scam.

How horrible OP, the scammers not your DPs, it depends if I could without going short myself, it would be a loan though rather than a gift. I do gift money to DS but if I did for this situation then less care might be taken in future, I would be the one suffering the loss. So a loan is OK as long as affordable but not a gift in this situation.

Yes I'd pay it . We all have shit times in our life when a little help would be appreciated.

I'm not sure it will be paid back by the bank

Yes exactly and because the app has changed since I last used it a few years ago I wasn't sure what it looked like when Etsy messaged you.

I would so give you the money if I were your parent. Because this is clearly a one-off case and you have learnt from it. I don't believe in loans in the family anyway, so I would either gift or not. In this case, gift.

I was the “child” in this story once, although I hadn’t done anything to be “scammed” my bank account was emptied. Whoever stole my money used it to purchase a series of flights. My parents did lend me the money which I paid back once the bank returned my money. Would the bank really pay back the money though if you willingly gave your card details to someone (even if it was a scam)? Has this been reported to the police?

Yes I've reported to action fraud and informed my bank too. Really not sure if I will get the money back or not. I've been loaned the money from my partner but obviously will pay them back.

I text my mum last night saying I've had a tough time recently and felt both my parents hadn't been there. She read the message and has ignored me.

"I text my mum last night saying I've had a tough time recently and felt both my parents hadn't been there. She read the message and has ignored me."

That's hurtful OP I feel for you 💐

It may be helpful to bear in mind that your parents cannot give you what they do not have. I don't mean money, I mean emotionally intelligent support.

Learning to moderate your (very reasonable!) expectations of other people can be a good strategy to reduce the emotional pain they cause you. Frustration and upset often stem from having hopes and expectations that are not met.