Son's school transport ASD

[SLeanne]

Our son is 12 and has ASD and ADHD. As such, the secondary school which was deemed 'most appropriate' to meet his needs is some 40 mins drive away. The council organise his transport there and back.

Last year he had a very nice older gentleman driver who worked for the council and drove a council minibus and collected other children on the way. No issues. He then retired.

Since then the council have outsourced to a local taxi firm.

We have had some concerns about the driver for a little while in terms of how he talks to us about our son at pick up and drop off times. We know DS is a chatty character, but the driver has said things like he 'gives him a headache' and 'can you give him a tranquilliser dart?' or 'I'm going to sedate him'. This you can brush off as a joke maybe, but he just seems a very odd character. DS has told us how the driver has told him how he's tried to commit suicide before and other personal details which we feel are not appropriate to be talking to a child about.

The final straw came yesterday when we found out that my father in law was on the phone to DS today and heard the driver telling him to 'shut the hell up'. We cancelled this morning's taxi and DH took him. We are not in a position to do this everyday as we have another younger child to take to a different school and DH doesn't work from home everyday.

We asked the council transport coordinator if he could be allocated a different driver, which they have organised, but now I feel bad for this bloke. By the sounds of it he has been allocated 'non school runs' so hasn't been sacked.

Was IBU?

It’s totally natural to feel a bit guilty as it sounds like he’s not doing it deliberately and just doesn’t ‘get’ it. But you have 100% done the right thing. You don’t want your DS learning to speak to people this way or feeling like his natural chattiness is an issue. There are ways the taxi driver could have communicated that he preferred quiet journeys, without being rude or making inappropriate comments. Bonus that he hasn’t been sacked so you don’t have anything to feel bad about really.

Speak to transport about it ,I wouldn't be sending my son with someone so inappropriate
my Lea,outsource a lot of school transport out to local.firms too.the qualiity of drivers and P; A,s we have had over the years have been variable to say the least .

Don't feel guilty, sounds like he just wasn't suited to school transport. Its quite different to ferrying adults around!

Thank you. I don't think he's a nasty person but probably not best suited to talking to vulnerable children. I also noticed a few days ago he took several empty coke cans and put them in our recycling bin. Not a massive deal either but surely that's not normal? Our son says he does it a lot. First I had witnessed it

Don’t feel guilty. If you can’t deal with chatty children then you don’t take a school runs role.

Don’t feel guilty he’s wildly unsuitable for a school run.

Don't feel bad at all.

We have a significant amount of issues with the transport teams that bring children to our SEND school each day.

Your issue is quite a small one compared to what I've had to deal with.

County transport go for the cheapest tenders they can. A quality driver/chaperone is worth their weight in gold.

Indeed they are but alas. They are few and far between my son is in year 9 and as been getting transport to his special school.since reception we have had a couple of cracking,PA,s ,most are mediocre ,and one or two dire Ones over the years

Sometimes I feel bad about complaining. But it must be said we apparently live in the most expensive council tax area in the country. And we don't claim for anything else. We got a tracker for our son when he first started secondary school, and it registered the driver had been doing 80mph in a 60 zone. And we complained about that too

I think you're only unreasonable for not taking this up with the LA before now.
It doesn't matter whether his comments and actions are not from a place of malice; he's systematically demonstrated that he's not a suitable adult to be transporting children with SEN and/or disabilities.
I wouldn't feel guilty, having let it go on to long aside.
I'd feedback what you've shared here to the LA transport team in writing.

Don’t feel bad when it comes to safety of children.

A man who discusses suicide, in any way, shape or form, is entirely unsuitable for a school run job.

His comments about silencing your son also make him unsuitable for it, especially a SEN school run as he has no idea what your child can understand or how he’ll interpret words.

Don’t feel bad. There’s no way he doesn’t know he’s been inappropriate multiple times. He made that choice.

I refused the offer of transport to school organised by the council. No way am I sending my vulnerable DD in a taxi with an unknown man. I take her myself, for now.

I think this problem lies with these taxis firms and the council trying to get as cheap a deal as possible. Now they have allocated him a 19 year old driver as a replacement. I'm not overly happy about that either. But I can't complain all the time!

You absolutely can!

If you have valid complaints then it doesn’t matter if you have 2 or 20 - you can make them.

I’ve had my youngest DDs driver changed once, but many years ago I had DD2s taxi driver changed 4 times in 6 months. She had one that smoked , one that made her and the other child late for school three times in one week because he stopped for fuel midway (it was cheaper than a local petrol station pre-pick ip), one that swore repeatedly (including calling another driver a fucking cunt when they pulled out in front of him), and one that repeatedly forgot booster seats (we weren’t allowed to provide them, the taxi company did).

The may have thought I was that parent, but they were all justified complaints.

A child that goes to my sons school.fell.asleep on transport going to school and neither the driver or P A noticed and got all the children off the bus at school apart from him and it was only when they were driving back to base and he woke up.they noticed !
He's non verbal and very vulnerable thankfully he was fine but that's my worst nightmare as my son is also non verbal and very vulnerable