To feel as though I may have failed this woman?

[WorriedAboutDrunkWoman]

I am laying in bed wide awake as I cannot stop thinking about a young woman I saw this evening whilst on my way home from work.

She was absolutely wasted drunk, swaying all over the place, could barely put one foot in front of the other and was leaning against a wall practically asleep.

I’d just come out of work and the last bus home was 1 minute away, as it pulled up and everyone was getting on, I noticed a guy watching this woman and walking very slowly passed her, I hesitated before getting on the bus but saw he had gone far enough away to not look too suspicious, so I got on the bus.

As the it drove off I saw him approaching her and I felt sick to my stomach, jumped off the next stop and ran back down the road at which point they had both gone.

I am so worried about what might have happened to her and feel so guilty that my own need to get home clouded my judgement of the situation and that I definitely should not have got on that bus.

I ended up having to walk home as I didn’t have enough money for an Uber or another bus, so equally put myself in danger.

It’s just really playing on my mind and I hope and pray that she got home safely.

Both are responsible explanations, but I definitely don’t believe he was her partner they both came from different directions and you could tell he was a stranger to her.

"Maybe raped at most"

What have I just read 😭😡🤬

Sometimes people just don’t think.

Sorry ??? 😳😳😳 did i read that right??? You cant just type in casual tone and then throw the "raped st modt comment " in🤦‍♀️

You have nothing to go on except what you made up in your head, if you have genuine concerns call the police

The guy has probably had the same thought process as you did, walked past her and though woah can’t leave her like that and Turned back to offer her a safe way home.

write down the date and time now and absolute everything you remember no matter how inconsequential you think it might be.

give it to the police and tell them why, ask for it to be recorded with your contact details and then get it out of your head. Every time it pops in remember he is far more likely to have got her home safely.

when I was a teenager I got really drunk and fell out with my friends and walked home with no shoes on, crying all the way. A group of boys pulled over in a car and offered me a lift, I screamed at them to leave me alone. They kept circling back and essentially followed me the whole way home.

I told my brother about it later and said I was lucky they didn’t kidnap me. He called me an idiot and pointed out if they were going to kidnap me they wouldn’t have followed me for 45 minutes. Obviously they were making sure no one else kidnapped me.

That made me sad and my mind went straight to Jill Meagher here in Australia who was just walking home from the pub along with Eurydice Dixon who was walking home from a stand up gig here in Australia.

I think this is a good answer.

Oh well if she's only been raped, that's OK sure.

Fuck sake. Please could you think about how your words will affect other people.

My first thought would be that the man was similarly concerned and offered her help to get home safely. I have been sexually assaulted twice in my twenties and still I think the vast majority of men are decent so wouldn’t jump to any conclusions.

jesus christ. what even is this place.

OP I know this is going to eat you up. You did try to make sure she was OK at the time - in retrospect it's understandable you feel you could have acted more decisively. I hope this woman is safe and I hope you can make peace with it too.

I have also been sexually assaulted and do not believe all men are the same, so do hope she got home safe.

It played on my mind because usually I would never hesitate if I saw anyone in that state and would try to help if I could.
I’d had a long day at work and just wanted to get home, but as I said my stomach just sank as soon as the bus moved and I saw him approaching her.