AIBU to stop sending gifts when none are acknowledged?

[Newbie2023]

I send my (mid-20s) godson b/day, Xmas, graduation, new job, etc gifts - cash inside cards, or items related to his hobbies/ /travels. I don’t hear back from him.

It is awkward as courier companies report they have delivered - but as the household are all out at work all day, I don’t know if the items have actually arrived. This means I need to contact my godson to check, but having to ask if he got a parcel makes me feel uncomfortable, like I’m fishing for thanks (although a quick text/thumbs up wouldn’t go amiss once in a while!).

Would it be unreasonable to stop sending gifts, given the lack of acknowledgment?

Not at all. You're not obligated to buy him them and quite frankly it's incredibly rude not to say thank you.
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He can’t be bothered to thank you. I’d stop the gifts immediately

He’s rude and plenty old enough to j who she should say thanks.

No, just he's in his 20's, time to pull back. I have done same with my godchild. I was getting a thank you text but he's earning now and I've never gotten anything back. Not looking for anything big, maybe a bottle of wine, card when I had a baby, etc. I I know we don't give to get and if I'm at a family occasion with him I'll buy him a couple of drinks but not a big christmas or birthday present.

Definitely rude. If he can’t be bothered to say thank you I would stop sending anything. He’s unlikely to ask about it.

Why awkward. If I don't hear anything I always ask if it was received. And then once the kids are old enough if I don't get a thank you, the gifts stop!

He doesn't even send a thank you text? If he can't be arsed to take 15 seconds to send you a thank you text I certainly wouldn't be arsed about stopping sending gifts. He's a bloody adult!!

Not even an acknowledgment?

Hell would freeze over before I sent the ungrateful brat anything ever again.

This! Now and again he might forget but if he never says thank you I would just stop now he is an adult. There is no excuse not to acknowledge the gifts and say thank you. Sounds like an entitled arse tbh

How bloody rude of him!

Are you in contact at all, otherwise? I mean, does he ever mention your gifts at all? Does he send you a greeting at Christmas?

Are you sure he still lives at that address?

I always think godparents should make an effort as long as they possibly can - but more than one unacknowledged present would lead to sharp words from me.

I wouldn't be phoning him, I'd assume if the delivery co says it's arrived then it has.

My aunt use to send me gifts, £20 here and there, small gifts etc. it got to the point where she was retired and didn’t have much cash, I’m earning a decent salary and I just felt reeeeally awkward telling her “please stop sending me stuff” the only way I could give her the hint was stopping to acknowledge the gifts and hope to god she would stop sending them! Maybe your godson is trying to send you a message too.

Very very good. Takes a second to text and acknowledge. I’d stop OP!

100% at address. I’m grateful for everyone’s thoughts and won’t be feeling so bad moving forward now - thank you so much :)

Doorstep theft is rife around his patch, otherwise I wouldn’t follow up.
I’m so grateful for everyone’s thoughts :)

Sunflower8848 - that is such a good point, thank you, I hadn’t considered this.

Absolutely stop - he is just rude. It's also completely standard to stop sending presents when the "child" reaches 18 or 21.

Definitely time to end it, I have a rule that I will go onto 18 without, but if there is still no written thank yous coming, or acknowledgements via text/message, then I would stop.

My aunt use to send me gifts, £20 here and there, small gifts etc.

But @Sunflower8848 did you never consider the pleasure she might have got from sending you those tiny gifts? Still being, in that way, a part of your life.

You must have drifted awfully far apart if you didn’t even feel you could tell her there was no need.

I’m a very loving aunt and would be painfully hurt if a niece or nephew indicated that I or my gifts were too lowly to be worth bothering with.

Id stop.
If he contacts you to ask where it is then you know he's just got no manners at all.

In our family all gifts stop at 18 years old. From then on just little gifts

I have recently stopped doing the same. Just go for it. There's been no gratitude and they're no longer a child.

I don't understand why you'd do this instead of just saying something, you were being well meaning, but now your aunt will just think you are rude and ungrateful if you didn't acknowledge her thoughtfulness

I send gifts freely and unconditionally, without expectation of thanks or acknowledgment. I wouldn’t chase to see if it was received, it probably has been.

My children do write thank you cards to others but I’d rather a gift I sent was just enjoyed by the child and they weren’t made to sit down and write a note.

@GreenMarigold surely at mid 20s a thank you would be nice? But that's lovely you don't mind