Kids at wedding regret

[Eva90]

I guess this is more of a rant as I don't think I can do much about it now. But essentially my fiancé and I invited a few of our cousins kids to our wedding as we see them a lot, but only really wanted to the older kids to come (age 15, 9 and 6) but as they have younger siblings (babies) we felt like we couldn't invite one and not the other. Since then, 3 our cousins are due to have babies 2 months before the wedding so it will now be all of the original kids plus the x2 3 year olds PLUS the x3 newborns. Ahhh

I honestly didn't think they would want to bring their 2 year olds when we sent out invites but they do. Obviously I understand that the new borns will have to come and that's fine

Will the 2 year olds need their own seats at the ceremony?

Because people pay a fortune for a videographer and baby crying and toddler screeching cuts through everything.

Even if they don't have a videographer some people want a solemn or zen like ceremony. That's their choice. Screams and sudden shouting kills the mood

Disclaimer that I didn’t have a childfree wedding, but I don’t think any couple who is spending £20-30k on what is effectively a party and who wants an adult-only day is being unreasonable.

As the famous MN saying goes, “It’s an invitation, not a summons.”- no one is obliged to attend if it doesn’t work for them. If a parents can’t get childcare, the B&G should accept that’s a natural consequence of excluding kids from the guest list.

I think you either need to pull the invite now (change your mind to say no kids) or fully prepare for your wedding to be disrupted. Sorry, but the chance of someone crying or screaming or running around is highly likely so you need to mitigate this risk now. You can talk to the parents, but let's face it most are useless so even if they say they will male sure they are quiet there are no guarantees

So you thought families would come but just leave the 2 yo behind because you don't like 2 year olds?

Pressed send too soon.

What is it about the 2 yos you are bothered about? Is Aimee they'll sort on a mattress lap for the ceremony.

If it makes you feel any better, we really appreciated friends & family inviting our children to weddings when they were very little. We wouldn't have been able to leave them with anyone, and we made sure they weren't at all disruptive.

During the ceremony I'd expect to sit a 2yo on my lap rather than needing their own seat, but probably safest to check with the parents if it's important to know for working out the amount of seating needed. A 3yo would be more likely to need their own seat.

Aw I love kids at weddings. My wedding was full
of kids. They were no bother at all during the (short) ceremony and had a great time running around in the grounds outside. After that, I can honestly say i didn’t really notice what they were up to.

The day will pass you by in a flash and you’ll wonder why you wasted energy worrying about this, imo.

Or outside the ceremony room being hushed by a parent which was the case in my wedding… 🙈

@QueenOfWeeds that is a shocking idea OP please don’t do that!

If you are worried about young children making a noise the last thing you want to do is group them together doing an activity (that an adult is clearly then going to have to supervise otherwise they’ll be running up and down to show their pictures to mummy).

A colouring table would be SUCH a vibe kill!